is his ex going to ruin our relationship???

LegacyUser

Hi there i feel as if tis will turn into a rant so i therefore give advanced warnings.

i’v been with my bfd for over 7months. We get on really really well. Its so brill!, we met each others families, hang out a lot etc(e drives a sexy car so that really helps lol) in 18 es 19 this i prob my first serious relationship but it is not his.

E was wit this girl for 2 and a half years, it ended badly. They were each others first everything . ...girl to bring home, loves, sex...u get the idea..

She went to college a year earlier than him..my bfd.. behind his back she met sum1 else(“mark”), met up on the quite and were sleeping wit each other. So that ended that.

I feel e went into a depression s e grew es hair, listened 2 different music etc...

Now were together but about a month and a bit,”mark” who lives near both of us as me wud there b any chance of us ever getting together. I wasn’t havin any of it, i told him where to put his notitions.E kept this up 4 a while ur bfd could’nt satifiy es last girl i hd 2 do it 4 em and so on..

I never told my bfd tis as e wud love 4 nothing more but a reason 2 lay into “mark”.

My bfd often spoke of es ex , but v rarely by name usually just her, she, it, dat one, dat bitch etc.

3-4 months into our relationship, we wer messin up in mine 1 nite, simple harmless stuff when it turned nasty. E called me “Claire”. I felt so hurt and destroyed because earlier that same nite we hd did more stuff than we hd done b4. All i cud keep thinkin was hd e kept thinking in his mind was that tis was er that was **** em off???

We hd a heart to heart and i told him about i felt hurt and soon, that i understood thatshe had been a major part of es life and because she ended it wit him that it didn’t mean that e hd felt the same way. And so on

E said e didn’t she meant nothing to him anymore e was soo much more happier wit me that e hd ever been wit er. That e luv’d me etc.. (he had been in other relationships since they broke up and before we got together)

Last nite it was es birthday so we went out as wit our groups. When we wer out e saw “Claire”. E told me did e said she was in a blue dress and i know she saw me out of the couner of her eye. E went on sayin known tat she was out hd ruined es nite, and she was only out because she knew it was his birthday.

I was only stayin till 12 so i wasn’t going to the niteclub but e was e said hoe e was going to hv 2 look at er all nite now and that it had been ruined on em etc. E got clingy for him in public and we soon left that bar to go elsewhere before we did e told our group that that bitch was out 2 nite.

We havnt had sex and i don’t intend on for a long time wit him, but we hv done a lot .
he is one of those people who only say and write LUV and only fully mean LOVE until they hv had sex wit that person.

I am of the different opinion that u LOVE a person and feel u know them etc and u express this by havin sex. E knows i feel like this but i don’t want to bring it up because i feel as if i wud b forcing him to same sumat e may not full mean.

Am i being too understand?? Or sud i just get over this and deal wit i cos every relationship is like this???

Sorry bout it being so long (thanks for reading this tho!!)

And comment left i thank you for!! If tis was any other relationship i wud consider ending it but i reallllly do love him and care so much for him but i feel as if its ending up being all giving on myside of the relationship and es doing all the takin


Any advice on what to do?????????????????

Marksie

OP: i got totally distracted reading that post with the text speak. Could you please not use it.

sharkie2008

OP i tried reading but couldn't understand it, try writing properly as text speak isnt allowed and is difficult to understand

Mixedup

I just about understood that OP but the text speak hurt my eyes!

I'd be annoyed if i were you, seven months into a relationship with someone i wouldnt like to think that the sight of an ex would get to them that much, i think that an extreme reaction, positive or negative, would indicate that they arent really over them yet..

I think you're right on the sex thing tho, you're very young and you should have you're first time with someone you are in love with, and who is in love with you. You don't have to have slept with someone to know how you feel about them so don't be pressured into anything.

JavaBear

possible troll but anyway..

for those that couldn't read it:

the real problem was that the OP feels like the bf should be saying "love" instead of "luv"

loloray

Argh couldn't finish it, the text speak was too awful.
But is this a joke? The OP has an issue with the spelling of love???

*dolly*

what exactly is upsetting you OP?
that he called you by his ex's name?
that she still has the power to upset him?
did he actually say or hint at the fact that he couldnt be in love with you til you had slept together?
do you think he doesnt love you?

colly10

loloray wrote: »

Argh couldn't finish it, the text speak was too awful.
But is this a joke? The OP has an issue with the spelling of love???

No - "E called me “Claire”"

help0909 wrote: »

Any advice on what to do?????????????????

Yes, don't use text-speak

Wagon

Well, I think he seems worried that the same thing that happened with his ex could happen with you. Then again, i don't speak the language you just typed Try posting again, this time in English?

sharkie2008

i would be worried about being called by his ex's name, it sounds like he isn't over her to me and after seven months of being with you he should have moved on. if he talks about her often it would ring alarm bells with me

SarahSassy

help0909 wrote: »

e drives a sexy car so that really helps lol

Yeah this is the best basis for a mature relationship :rolleyes:

The post was too difficult to read as it was in textspeak.

Marksie

OP: no one is able to read your post. I am locking the thread and you can repost without using textspeak