Advice Please

aoife123

Hi,

I'M looking for a little advice, a few weeks ago I split up from my partner of three years, it was to say the least a complete surprise to me. The week after we broke up I also found out that I am pregnant, which has turned my life upside down. I spoke to my ex and basically he doesn't want to know. I have been trying to way up my options and see whats best for everyone. I also have looked into abortion but i'm so confused I can't decide how I really feel about anything. At some stage in my life I do want to have children but i don't know if this is the right time. I am in my late 20's and have a good job etc, but I am so afraid of making the wrong decision. Has anyone gone through anything similar?

Miss Fluff

I haven't OP but you should probably make an appointment with these guys and have a good talk through it all. www.positiveoptions.ie I hope you come to the right decision for yourself OP.

littlefriend

I don't know anyone who regrets having their child - I know a lot of ppl who regret having an abortion. I kind of think that even if 1% of you is considering keeping the baby then you should go ahead and keep it. Forget the father - he's made his choice. I'm sure being a single mum isn't the easiest thing ever but it is possible.



[BTW I am not anti abortion]

Marksie

Ok folks. Due to the contentious nature of these types of threads, we will be monitoring them closely.

Any emotive appeals, name calling or dragging off topic will result in the post being deleted and ensuing warnings, infractions and bannings.

LegacyUser

You poor thing, what an awful experience and shock! I know this may seem unhelpful but is there any chance he doesn't believe you about the pregnancy? That he may think its an extreme form of emotional blackmail to get him back? After 3 years he should show you more respect than to say 'he doen't want to know'. It seems very strange. I wouln't make any rash decisions for the moment. An abortion is something you can't take back, and I do believe in personal choice but just make sure you are doing the right thing for you. Definately get some professional advice and maybe speak to him again once you are sure what you want to do. Look after yourself.

spinandscribble

you poor thing OP. please talk to some professionals, you're heads in a spin now and you need to talk to someone who has no emotional involvement in this. if your ex doesnt want to know then i'd forget about him. this is all about you and what you want, whats best for every body is a funny thing to say as whats best for you and this possible baby might be two different things. if you've got a secure job and have good friends and family then maybe keeping this baby is an option.

aoife123

lost love wrote: »

You poor thing, what an awful experience and shock! I know this may seem unhelpful but is there any chance he doesn't believe you about the pregnancy?

no he believes me alright, this is the worst thing in the world for him. He's planning on moving abroad if i go ahead.

cjmcork

he shouldn't be a factor in your decision

Marksie

Aoife123. I think its vitally important you do not go through this alone.
Go to independent professional advice or talk to someone you can trust.
here is a link to our stickies page:

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=833337&postcount=2

spinandscribble

after the shocks set in he might change his mind. jesus though, moving aboard to avoid this potential kid? is that to avoid helping you out or in a weird way to blackmail you into getting rid of it?