Can't see baby

maryoshea

Hi just looking for some advise here.

My friend met a girl in xmas 06 and she ended up pregnant. They were getting on well together until she asked him to move in with her, my friend moved in with her for awhile but felt uncomfortable living in the area as he had bad memories of the place. So he moved back home to save for a better location and she went back to her mams house.

She then had the baby and he was there for the birth and all of a sudden she won't answer his txts and gets smart with him. I would like to know has my friend any rights to see his baby? They are not married. He would love to see his little girl and he would be a good dad.:)

I think its terrible anyway.

Miss Fluff

He probably does but surely this is an issue for your friend and his ex??????

gerTheGreat

Hi this spells it out fairly clearly:
http://www.citizensinformation.ie/categories/birth-family-relationships/unmarried-couples/access_to_children_and_unmarried_couples

By law in Ireland, unmarried mothers are the sole guardians of children born outside of marriage. Unless the mother agrees to sign a statutory declaration an unmarried father must apply to the court in order to become a legal guardian of his child.
A father may apply for access whether or not he is a guardian. He can do this even if his name is not on the child's birth certificate, and even where his application for joint guardianship has been turned down.

maryoshea

Yes it is an issue for my friend and his ex (if he could talk to her) In my opinion i think she used him to get pregnant and he can get lost after that :mad:

I feel sorry for my friend because he has only had 1 relationship before and he ended it because the woman had a drink problem and wasn't willing to change. My friend and his girlfriend are in their 30s.

KdjaCL

Its ireland Dads have no rights to anything, he can go to court but he will lose.


Unless he has a batman suit hes ****ed.


kdjac

Chinafoot

maryoshea wrote: »

In my opinion i think she used him to get pregnant and he can get lost after that :mad:

No offence meant as I'm sure you're just concerned for your friend but you really shouldn't go down the road of saying things like that unless you have hard evidence that this is the case.

You don't know the ins and outs of this so my advice would be to point your friend at the citizens information centre and let him sort things out himself. Be there to listen and support him by all means but you should probably avoid voicing your personal opinion of this woman.

humanji

I agree with Chinafoot. Get your friend to get legal advice, but stay out of it after that. You don't know anything other than what your friend has told you. Just be their fro your friend, but let them decide how to proceed.

King of Kings

KdjaCL wrote: »

Its ireland Dads have no rights to anything, he can go to court but he will lose.


Unless he has a batman suit hes ****ed.


kdjac

not true.
The courts have coped on recently - you only hear the bad results, nobody published the happy ending stories from the family court

The Corinthian

He has bugger-all rights by default. Fortunately this is changing and unless he is a serious nut-job he will be awarded guardianship and visitation rights if he brings her to court. Enforcing this, of course, is another matter; a father who fails to pay maintenance will get locked up, but a mother who denies a court order on visitation will only get a stern talking to.

The exception to this is that if the father is a legal guardian and the mother attempts to take the child out of the state without his permission, she will get arrested for abduction even if she's in another country.

Ultimately, no matter what happens there is a good chance that he may end up in a running battle with the mother for years to come, with repeated court appearances and endless mind-games.

Chinafoot wrote: »

No offence meant as I'm sure you're just concerned for your friend but you really shouldn't go down the road of saying things like that unless you have hard evidence that this is the case.

Unfortunately this is all to common in Ireland - which is sometimes referred to as the Mammy State by family law solicitors. The number of ticking thirty-something women out there go looking for a sperm doner is actually scary.

siouxie sue

Hey Mary you should tell your friend to count himself lucky at least he is not landed with a screaming kid. He will meet someone else and his ex will be left holding the baby.

The Corinthian

siouxie sue wrote: »

Hey Mary you should tell your friend to count himself lucky at least he is not landed with a screaming kid. He will meet someone else and his ex will be left holding the baby.

There's nothing lucky about his scenario. If he was a woman he could put that screaming child up for adoption or even preemptively terminate it - and would have a constitutional right to be given abortion information and travel for the purposes of said. As a man he has the right to pay, and that's about it.