Looking for a life coach

presotrader

Hi!

I was recently advised to book sessions with a lifecoach to work on my issues. Thought about doing it online, but somebody else told me I should have 121s in order to benefit from the whole experience.

Does anyone know a lifecoach in South Dublin? How does it go, they have cabinets and you need an appointment?

Thank you for any information you can offer.

Victor

Be careful 'lifecoach' can be at the smarmy end of the help market.

What is the nature of the things you want to work through.

presotrader

Thank you for your answer.
What do you mean by "the smarmy end of the help market"?

I seem to go around in circles in my life. More like fighting fire than laying bricks - some money issues, small earthquake on my work evaluation, gf not okay.... this kind of things....
I need to shake out of this and put some order, but no more DIY as they don't seem to work for me. Friend of mine went to counselling for a drinking problem, but I am not up for that now

DetectivFoxtrot

presotrader wrote: »

Thank you for your answer.
What do you mean by "the smarmy end of the help market"?

I seem to go around in circles in my life. More like fighting fire than laying bricks - some money issues, small earthquake on my work evaluation, gf not okay.... this kind of things....
I need to shake out of this and put some order, but no more DIY as they don't seem to work for me. Friend of mine went to counselling for a drinking problem, but I am not up for that now

The above doesn't tell me a lot but here goes:

- re money issues - go to your bank. Discuss the money issues and put a plan in place. be it a payment plan, consolidation of debts... whatever. If you have bad money habits (like spending money you don't have) - sort it, cut up credit cards, pull back on unnecessary spends

- Work evaluation? Do you mean your appraisal / performance review didn't go well?? If so seek feedback on the key issues and ask your boss for suport to help you improve in these key areas. Again, put a realsitic plan in place so you have something to focus on

- re the g/f, not enough info above to comment

IMO you don't need a life coach. and if you have money issues that's the LAST thing you wanna be spending you money on. Also i'm not aware (I stand to be corrected) of a Life Coaching qualification so how do you know you'll get good advice?

There's a line in a song that always struck a chord with me "Be careful of advice that you pay for, value advice that you get for free". Friends and family (i.e. peple who know you inside out) wll be the best advisors and helpers so ask them. Also they'll be 100% honest.

presotrader

sorry, I am partially blaming the ways I was treated as child for some of my problems. and I had enough bad advice from my family, no offense there, but it does not apply. it would also mean either discussing my problems over the phone or travelling a lot back and forth. got tired of this running back to mama thing, anyway.

it's not that kind of money problem I am talking about. no bank involved, and not overspending, more like the opposite.
and I don't prescribe myself any drugs when sick, so this time I will follow advice, just trying to get some directions here where to look for a professional.

low self-esteem and lack of focus in my life are just below the threshold of what makes it a counsellor's job, from what I understood. pub counselling is over its head in this, and I don't want to talk to the local ch****e bartender about it.

realistic plan aka "do this and that"? been through those, what good does it do? ever felt like you worked all day, but you had nothing to show for it?
how about every day?

DetectivFoxtrot

presotrader wrote: »

realistic plan aka "do this and that"? been through those, what good does it do? ever felt like you worked all day, but you had nothing to show for it?
how about every day?

reading your second post I' even more confused, sorry!

Maybe you're just having a bad day? If not, and it's an every day thing then I think you do need therapy - just even to talk things out. Sometimes it's not about making plans but I recommended that becuase your first post sort of suggested a lack of focus. Regularly feeling like you haven't achieved anything is not a good place to be in my friend so you need a counsellor imo

humanji

+1 that, To be honest, I don't really know what you want from your posts, and that makes me think that you just need to talk things through with someone. Even one visit will help you get a grasp on what you really want and set you on the road you want to travel.

eowyn_08

presotrader wrote: »

Hi!

I was recently advised to book sessions with a lifecoach to work on my issues. Thought about doing it online, but somebody else told me I should have 121s in order to benefit from the whole experience.

Does anyone know a lifecoach in South Dublin? How does it go, they have cabinets and you need an appointment?

Thank you for any information you can offer.

Hi, if you can't find anyone by word of mouth, try have a look at the website of the Coach Association of Ireland, there is a database of members of the association (under Find a coach). Some have a website and most say what their qualifications are:

http://www.lbcai.ie/

Hope it helps!

af_thefragile

Hey, check out the stuff by Anthony Robbins.
Google his name and should lead you to his website.

His stuff is excellent to get your life back on track. And you don't really need a life coach. First try helping yourself before you look for somone else to help you. You can do it yourself if you can take the initiative and its better that way. Thats what Anthony Robbins stuff is all about and it really helps!

If you can't do it yourself, its unlikely someone else can do it to a great extent either.
You don't need a life coach. Learn to motivate yourself.

Check out the movie "The Peaceful Warrior" and watch it all the way to the very end. Its a brilliant movie and should give you something.

presotrader

Thank you all for your answers and support.
First of all, for DetectivFoxtrot - I am quite aware of the nature of my problems following the discussion with the HR consultant, who actually has a counselling practice as well.
He gave me this recommendation, hence my thread.
Humanji, thank you for your objectivity.
Eowyn - I took your advice and *** I HAVE AN APPOINTMENT ***. Apparently this is an "introduction session", it will not cost me anything but one hour of my time, and mainly will try to assess if I have the right expectations regarding this process. Right....
af_thefragile - thank you for your advice. I have tried to "help myself" and I accept that my results are rather poor. I will look for the movie. You scared me a little, to be very honest: "If you can't do it yourself, its unlikely someone else can do it to a great extent either." - I learned English with a teacher but French alone. Which do you think produced better results and higher confidence?

If I get any meaningful feedback from this session I will return here to post about it.
Otherwise probably I will just give up on this as well, sooner or later.

Victor

presotrader wrote: »

What do you mean by "the smarmy end of the help market"?

Some of the Life Coach types that I have come across are salesmen, they are selling confidence. This will last a certain amount of time.

What is probably more needed is a solution to the problem, not a band-aid that merely hides the problem.

That said, sometimes what people need is confidence.

af_thefragile

^Hey, i didn't mean to demoticate you or anything.

What i meant to say was, there's a lot you can do yourself before you start looking for others to help you out.
A lot of people don't do their homework properly and then give up saying they can't help themselves anymore. Now a life coach will come and tell you the exact same things you've herd a million times before only difference would be this time you'ld do your homework cuz you'ld be scared to not piss the lifecoach off.

Now if you instead focus on why you're not doing your homework properly and try to work out to getting your homework done, you won't need a lifecoach cuz you'll start getting results yourself.

There are two ways of getting through your problems/issues here. There's the long hard way of going on a journey of self discovery and figure out whats wrong with you, working it out yourself and getting results. Then there's the short cut route of finding someone else who can do it all for you.

Now the life coach will difinitely help and speed things up. But i'ld like to think the life coach should be the last resort. There's a lot you can do yourself before you'ld really feel the need of the life coach. And in all fairness, its expensive and not easy to find a good life coach who'll suit you and your needs.
I was going through some bad times a few months ago and i wen't to a counsellor a few times. In all fairness i doubt he helped me much. What got me through it was my own constant persistance to make my life better.

But anyway good luck with it.

And remember. Don't give up!!!
A lot of people will tell you about things you can't do cuz they couldn't do it themselves. Don't let that take you down.

I like this analogy. How many times would you let a baby fail at learning to walk before you let him give up on it?
Well, i guess the answer is you don't give up until the baby learns to walk!
Adults forget this and learn to give up too early.

__plec__

i could recommend a great coach based in dun laoghaire if you want.

Went to them with massive confidence problems, and it helped me so much, am actually in control of my life now. The thing is be open minded, but id certainly recommend a consultation and then you can make up your own mind whether to take this route or not.

all i can say is it certainly worked for me

Lola123

A life coach usually helps you to focus on what you want out of life.... eg, career, health, money, etc. It should be noted that they are not trained as counsellors, but people who've come out of counselling generally find the services provided by a life coach can be beneficial.
Some life coaches are only career coaches, so do your research first.

Susannahmia

DetectivFoxtrot wrote: »

Also i'm not aware (I stand to be corrected) of a Life Coaching qualification so how do you know you'll get good advice?

My aunt does life coaching through the net and telephone in America, she defiantly did some sort of course in it and added to that she is a qualified psychologist. I'm not sure if that is the norm however.

Hellm0

Hey, be very careful of the whole "life coach" thing. I know a few guys who got into that(as coaches) and I wouldn't trust them as far as I can throw them. Alot of the guys I know who went into it after having done weekend workshops with so called "seduction" experts and the like and are little more than NLP robots trying to convince you that they are in some way superior to you enough to fix your problems.

If I were you I would seek counseling for any emotional issues you may be having as this will be much more rewarding. As for the financial/professional issues that is something you will need to sort out personally or with the aid of a certified financial professional.

Marksie

DetectivFoxtrot wrote: »

Also i'm not aware (I stand to be corrected) of a Life Coaching qualification so how do you know you'll get good advice?

I am investigating Lifecoaching at the moment and you do get qualifications at the end. But i am looking at accredited courses which lead to that qualification.

And the advice depends on whether the person wants to take it or not, because thats wht it is in the end. Like advice in threads here, it is up to the person to make the relevant lifestyle changes.,

But hey i dont have one yet so i dont know what i am talking about .

__plec__

The person i seen has a business degree in dublin, life coaching qualifications from the US, and is a qualified hypnotherapist, amongst other studies.

I know qualifications dont mean everything, and i was slightly skeptical in starting, but it changed my life.

anyone else i seen previously seemed to just tell me their way was the correct way, while with this i was encouraged to embrace the idea of positive thinking, read about other people, even go see comedians (anything to put you in a positive mood) and was shown how to just relax and enjoy life. Also showed me that i was in total control of my life, even those things i thought i wasnt.
With my job, which i used to struggle with, ive been so happy, getting great projects, and my salary keeps getting better, my relationships with others are alot better etc etc, the list goes on

I can see why people will question it, and i think people should, but all i can say is that for me it worked so well, and i think it would benefit anyone, and i know others will tell you to stay away from it, but i dont think there is any harm in just investigating, see how you feel about it then.

Bluebells

Just be carefull to check qualifications (im not sure what to be looking for btw). Im sure theres a lot of people who genuinly care and want to help get peoples lives on track but im wary. I know someone who charged 100 euro an hour to lecture a client in a hotel lobby. They cancelled when they liked and insisted on talking for 2 hours instead of 1 at a time (so they would get double pay I assume). They also told the person to go off all medication immediatly (antidepressants and sleeping tablets) and for someone who was very depressed at the time, it did not go well. Some of the things they said were very odd (they said they had made a previous client wear fairey wings to prove he'd go along with what he was telling him?) It was very very strange, even stranger that this person was recomended.

presotrader

hehe - this forum helped me - I did my homework, searched several places, met a few coaches and finally got into sessions with one of them.
I had to commit to at least 4 sessions (which sounded like strings attached first), but it proved the right thing to do. Ended with 12 or 13 (first was sort of introduction), and I have an open door now - can come back every couple of months to realign my priorities and such.
The results were absolutely great - job goes well (I have an interview for a higher position this Monday - right on!), life is good, thought of some nice investment ideas and overall I feel better about myself.
I would strongly recommend it - it helped me become a better person without any tricks involved.

Thank you all for your advices.

miss no stars

I hope it works out for you, OP

As a general warning, I for one wouldn't go near them with a barge pole! We've one in the family and tbh, she's the saddest thing going. Her life is a mess, I'm not joking. She has literally managed to screw up almost every aspect of her life (and no, she hasn't sorted it out and become a life coach because of sorting it out!), yet she has the gall to tell others how they should live their lives!!! :eek:

mikemac

Maybe you want to meet a coach but another option would be buy one the tape programs.

Some cost hundreds but you can get them on ebay too.
I've the Anthony Robbins stuff, it's very good actually. He'd be the most well known but there are others.

Yeah, it costs thousands to go the seminars and stuff but it's free to check out a few videos on youtube and only a few quid on ebay

Marksie

DetectivFoxtrot wrote: »

IMO you don't need a life coach. and if you have money issues that's the LAST thing you wanna be spending you money on. Also i'm not aware (I stand to be corrected) of a Life Coaching qualification so how do you know you'll get good advice?

There are several courses as i am investigating becoming one myself. Some are accredited some aren't and lead to qualifications

presotrader

I thought I was writing the epitaph on this thread, and look....

Just some feedback here, given my newly found "wisdom"

A lifecoach that is not in control of his life is not worth going to... simple signs are the way your first call is handled (if they hurry you, if they don't explain, if they rush to discussing the price or force you to accept crazy hours for appointments), the way he/she looks (not the fashion police case, but professional and well put together), whether they are punctual or not.
I refused seeing a few after such examples.

Checking for accreditation was a good idea I took from this forum - my coach has a FETAC diploma in life and executive coaching and a psychology degree.

For people here recommending books, tapes, dvds, sessions in the pub, talking to strangers or solving your problems on the forums - with all respect, you are referring to something else. This is a 121, result-driven process, under the guidance of an expert who happens to have strong empathy as well.

I paid once and it pays back every day, probably for the rest of my life.
And I am proud that I took everything in and become another person.

cwynnes

Beautiful results presotrader, what a slap in the face for all the non believers

Notice how they have all gone silent now

presotrader

in fairness, some people have a life and surprisingly this might explain why they don't spend time on forums on Friday evening. although some of us check our e-mails when we get home

Nevyn

Life coaches in this country are for the most part non accredited and non regulated so be careful who you enguage to help you make changes in your life.

cwynnes I suggest you read the rules for posting in this forum before posting again.
Abusing posters will get you banned.

presotrader glad you found something that is working for you.
I am locking this thread now.