Need motivation

MIN2511

Guys,

I am going through rough times in my family and it's taking it's toll on me. I recently started a new job which is equally tasking and requires a lot of hard work and dedication. I am a strong individual but then i go through periods when i am sad and nearly depressed and it's sad. I have a very active life e.t.c. i like to hang out with my mates and basically just have fun. The thing is i have a final year project to finnish in April, i am ****e at programming but i decided on a programming project and i have to say i have my days with it. I enjoy it somedays and others i hate it.
The thing is i am supposed to work on it in the evenings but then i find myself avoiding it. I also noticed i avoid things that seem tasking. Am sure people do but my project is due soon and in as much as i want to concentrate on it my mind isn't on it especially with the things going on with my family.
I don't know if i am looking for advice or what, i am not even going unreg for this but i don't know what i want anymore and it's upsetting. I wonder what is of higher priority now; my family or my degree

watsgone

Wow,

this sounds so familiar to me, It could have been me talking.
My advise talk to your college explain the situation, ask for help. It will come.
Lecturers will be helpful and point you in the right direction project wise

You can knuckle down till end of april, focus on that. I dont know your family situation but maybe they need time to sort out their issues for themselves

Sprouts

Not quite sure what it is your asking? Yes family are important, but theres only so much of yourself you can give also. You haven't said what the family issue entails but if it's affecting your studies it can't be good.

MIN2511

Nope won't mention the family issues but it's terrible atm and sometimes i want to escape from it all but i have to be strong for everyone....

Not sure what i am asking either, i know family is definitely more important but i don't want to have to carry the burden and i can't ignore them. Sometimes i escape by switching off my mobile e.t.c. but then when i do turn it on i feel guilty for doing that


Am so tired some days. Like i should rewind the days e.t.c. and i go why me?

Sprouts

No you shouldn't feel you should carry the burden, nor should you neglect your studies. All clouds pass, don't give up, and it's a fact the wildest white water rides don't last long, good luck.

Overheal

MIN2511 wrote: »

Guys,

I am going through rough times in my family and it's taking it's toll on me. I recently started a new job which is equally tasking and requires a lot of hard work and dedication. I am a strong individual but then i go through periods when i am sad and nearly depressed and it's sad. I have a very active life e.t.c. i like to hang out with my mates and basically just have fun. The thing is i have a final year project to finnish in April, i am ****e at programming but i decided on a programming project and i have to say i have my days with it. I enjoy it somedays and others i hate it.
The thing is i am supposed to work on it in the evenings but then i find myself avoiding it. I also noticed i avoid things that seem tasking. Am sure people do but my project is due soon and in as much as i want to concentrate on it my mind isn't on it especially with the things going on with my family.
I don't know if i am looking for advice or what, i am not even going unreg for this but i don't know what i want anymore and it's upsetting. I wonder what is of higher priority now; my family or my degree

#include <motivation> // ?

Ohh get rid of the #pragma once: you will be wanting to include multiple instances of motivation.

Umm this is no big secret but your degree is important on paper....

but Im in a similar situation so I'll bite. Short story is I'm a foreigner doing a degree here in Games Dev. Now, when I started it was a convenient setup. By the end of first year I was out here on my own after a family death so now the family wants to pull me back stateside even though I cannot get a qualification unless I finish all 4 years. Im into my 2nd year now. So far what Ive decided is that the risk still outweighs the reward (costs, immigration complications <gardai I hate ye!>, work, rent, exhange rates, etc) so in the face of my family's doubts I have told them I am committed to this this 100%. Is it the truth? No; I often have my doubts; the course has its glitches and the material is frequently frustrating; and theres always personal issues: girls that want to end you, friends that want to kill eachother over milk, sleeping, I love sleeping, so I'll say 80% committed... but I know that if I didnt have this course and something to strive for Id have sweet **** all and Ill have to start my life over again.

No matter what you decide, your family will respect your decision. So its a win either way; but I think its a big win to come home with the degree. In direct contrast, picking my family over my degree feels like a defeat.

If your family issues still throw a wrench into this outlook, do give me a PM.

MIN2511

Thanks Overheal... am also a foreigner... hehehe

Thanks guys, i woke up this morning feeling better but i still have the same problems.. Really appreciate your replies....

Marksie

MIN2511 wrote: »

Nope won't mention the family issues but it's terrible atm and sometimes i want to escape from it all but i have to be strong for everyone....

Not sure what i am asking either, i know family is definitely more important but i don't want to have to carry the burden and i can't ignore them. Sometimes i escape by switching off my mobile e.t.c. but then when i do turn it on i feel guilty for doing that


Am so tired some days. Like i should rewind the days e.t.c. and i go why me?

Sometimes we all say why me?

But why do YOU have to be strong for everyone? That is a fallacy and do stop kidding yourself

Its a fact, and i ahve seen it myself, that families will rely and keep piling the pressure on members who are always there. Blissfully unaware of the affect they are having.

It then becomes not the exceptional behaviour but the expected behaviour.

I think personally that you have to explain to them how difficult you are finding it and can they find an alternative for some of it and you have to not feel guilty about it.
Your not being selfish, but if you are feeling the strain, then self preservation kicks in

As for the degree well, can you talk to a supervisor? they are not all monsters .

I think you actually do know what you want, its stress that is causing this.
Any chance you could just go away from everything for a day or two to clear the head?

MIN2511

Thanks Marksie, i really considered before posting this. Yes i do know what is require of me. I need a break! I went shopping today and i have booked tivkets to go on a break next weekend, it's really too much for me my problems. Hopefully my family would understand that i can only take so much.

cheers guys i really appreciate your comments

AARRRGH

You can't control your family situation, but you can control whether you pass or fail your project. You have one and a half months to finish your project. That is enough time to get it done (or at least, to scrape a pass.)

The month and a half is going to happen whether you like it or not, so you can either choose to complete your project or not.

If you choose the latter option, you're just going to get more and more stressed as the days pass. And I'm assuming if you fail your project you have to repeat the entire year.

I am absolutely certain if you get your **** together and work hard on your project over the next few weeks, a lot of the stress and sadness you're currently feeling will go away.

Maybe break up your project into a set of tasks and start on #1 tonight. At least when you go to bed tonight you will see you've made progress.