I am a weird boy!

LegacyUser

Hiya guys.I am a 20 year old guy.Having been seeing ky girlfriend for the last two monts.The sex has been good but I haven't orgasmed yet I can thorugh oral sex.I really don't know why this is happening.It has also happened with all my previous lovers.

Dudess

Not remotely weird. Different types of stimulation produce different types of results. And different people get turned on by different things and in different ways.

Miss Fluff

How often do you ****? Might be an idea to put a stop to that for a while so you'll be in dire need of shooting your load when next with your GF.

john_aero

Miss Fluff wrote: »

How often do you ****? Might be an idea to put a stop to that for a while so you'll be in dire need of shooting your load when next with your GF.

yes this is a big prob, stopping for a while makes a huge diff for both

Fauldy Banny

I agree, give up spanking the little fella for a while and in no time you'll be wishing you could last a little longer. Obviously there's nothing physically wrong with you because you can cum when getting a blow job.

john_aero

well i am the same, sometimes happens way too quick and bj takes longer,everone diff too.i can last pretty long or may only last 30sec, best thing is not worry about it, can always have sex then finish with bj

marthaclark

This might sound weird but is it that you aren't ready for the intimate face to face sort of sex?

I mean, when she's going down on you.. you can sort of relax.. the pressure is off you.. Whereas with full on sex you might be in more of a position where you have to perform.. and maybe even take the lead? Maybe I am reading into this too much.

I just thought it might be akin to performance anxiety and maybe you weren't comfortable enough to let go yet.

Overheal

Theres more than one way to stimulate a clitoris: you may be using the wrong muscle. Try the fingers or tongue.

Dudess

The OP is saying he doesn't orgasm through penetrative sex.

Talliesin

Edit: This is all wrong since I read the OP backwards. Leaving rather than deleting, but I'm back in the right direction two posts below.

There are four things that will have a big effect here.

One is a matter of how good your lover is at doing it. Since you've had several lovers and found the same thing, this may not be the most likely thing going on here.

Another is how you about felatio. E.g if part of your mind feels that orgasming in a mouth is disrespectful you may then be over-worrying about trying to avoid that, and hence blocking yourself from orgasming.

Another is a wider aspect of the above, which is how good you are at receiving - since a lot of the more popular positions for heterosex tend to make more activity the man's perogative it's easy for men to not be very good at letting go.

A final one is simply that we all react differently to different sexual stimuli. Personally felatio would definitely hardest way for me to acceive orgasm.

Dudess

I thought the OP was saying he orgasms through oral sex, but not penetrative sex?

smoc

at least your not a virgin :rolleyes:

I used to have your problem in a different sense. As strange as it sounds I found it was me not being positive enough and not the other person and now I regret breaking up with her.

Talliesin

Oops. Yeah, I read the OP backwards.

Well, the last point of what I said still applies - it's just a different thing that he finds least good at bringing him to orgasm, but the basic point that some of us have things that bring us a lot quicker than other things still applies.

The other points similarly correlate. How you feel about a particular type of sex will have a big effect on how much you can release to it.

One question is do you find penetrative sex to be physically tiring, and hence get too tired to get to the point of orgasm? Taking a break from penetration and doing something else (since fellatio is a winner for you, so to speak, that's an obvious thing to put into the mix) and then going back to it may do well.

IRISH RAIL

Have you talked to your gf about this ? she is probably feeling very inadequate about it. Ive been like you for years it could be 101 different things. from being scared you will get her pregnent to something from being a kid your sub concious remembers,
Im still like it now some girls think its great at the start but then think you dont fancy them etc.
maybe some sexual counselling (I know thats not what its called but you know what I mean) also do the not having a play for a while and most important relax foreplay get really worked up that you explode
have fun trying to cum

Bottle_of_Smoke

This hapened to me the first few times I had sex. Same with the oral too. Once I came during intercoure for the first time it was never an issue again. So probably just psychological.

I think with oral you can relax because it's less close. And certainly less complicated for you. The tongues is sometimes more sensitive,especially with condoms. There's no pregnancy fear with oral, which is quite a phobia at 20.

Before you know it you'll be on the other side of the spectrum, relax.

Marksie

Talliesin wrote: »

One question is do you find penetrative sex to be physically tiring, and hence get too tired to get to the point of orgasm? Taking a break from penetration and doing something else (since fellatio is a winner for you, so to speak, that's an obvious thing to put into the mix) and then going back to it may do well.

IRISH RAIL wrote: »

Have you talked to your gf about this ? she is probably feeling very inadequate about it.

Now these two are excellent points and interrelated.

It is entirely possible that penetrative intercourse will not make you orgasm for a variety or reasons. Whereas other forms will, because you can let go.

Its important to realsie that in all aspects you are responsible for your own orgasm. But your g/friend may very well think its her fault..its a common fallacy.
That is where communication comes in.

Plus why should your inability to orgasm be an issue in penetrative sex? Penetrative sex isnt about the race to an orgasm but about the journey.

Both of your journeys..you havent mentioned whether she has an orgasm or not.

Now i dont quite think the same way, in that penetration has to lead to my ejaculatory orgasm (there are many other kinds..but i ahd to get that in didnt i lol). It may and may not. But i communicate to my lovers and frequently we move onto another form and if i decide to ejaculate that way i will.

Its a distinction in that you are freeing yourself from teh constraints on both of you that cumming through penetration is the only way to "do a good job" for teh lack of a better term. That also means that a certain amount fo self pressure is off both of you.
1). in the fact you know you dont have to worry that you must come inside her
2) that she feels that something is wrong with her because you dont

when you lift those pressures the whole thing goes a lot higher, deeper and more intimate