Sick Note

hearto83

Funny story, a mate got horribly drunk last week and needs a sick note for work. trouble is that as he was suffering from a hangover due to a good old wednesday night binge, the note is going to have to be a fake.

I tried to google them but didnt get anything.
Has anyone got any tips on what to do???
Was thinking along the lines of doing/writing something absolutley rediculous on it as he is leaving the job this friday and just wants the note to get paid

aidan_walsh

Dear [name]'s Boss,

[name] was absent from gym class on Thursday because he had a sniffle.

[name]'s Mom.

xzanti

Just tell him to go to the doctor and tell them he's stressed/tired or whatever and they'll give him a sick note...

stevoman

lets say im close to the whole cert thing. if you get a note complaining of stomach troubles its very broad and the employee has no right to go any more into the subject as you could have a normal tummy ache, yet it could also be a lot more presonal nature.

godtabh

You only need a sick note if you've been off sick for 3 days or more done you? Thats what it its been every placed I've worked

Trojan911

kearnsr wrote: »

You only need a sick note if you've been off sick for 3 days or more done you? Thats what it its been every placed I've worked

Ya, you can self certificate for up to two days, think you need a sick note on the third day though.

Dirty Dave

hearto83 wrote: »

Funny story, a mate got horribly drunk last week and needs a sick note for work. trouble is that as he was suffering from a hangover due to a good old wednesday night binge, the note is going to have to be a fake.

I tried to google them but didnt get anything.
Has anyone got any tips on what to do???
Was thinking along the lines of doing/writing something absolutley rediculous on it as he is leaving the job this friday and just wants the note to get paid

If you are going to go down the route of forging a doctors signature, make sure you do it right - if your friend gets caught, he will most likely be sacked on the spot.

Senna

go to the doctor, tell them you have a pain in your side (or whatever) you had it last week but it went away but its came back over the weekend.
ask for a note to cover last week.
they charge you for notes anyway, so cant seem them refusing.

Mossin

http://ie.youtube.com/watch?v=M9QN3tl8W_M

Archeron

Explosive diarrhea is the answer to all your problems.

muppetkiller

A sick note for work ?
What does he do work in the school tuck shop ?

hearto83

muppetkiller wrote: »

A sick note for work ?
What does he do work in the school tuck shop ?

how did you know?

hearto83

Dirty Dave wrote: »

If you are going to go down the route of forging a doctors signature, make sure you do it right - if your friend gets caught, he will most likely be sacked on the spot.

we r in OZ and he's finishing up on friday anyway, so we just thought it would be funny to try and get away with it for a bit of a laugh!!

Burp Bleugh

hearto83 wrote: »

Funny story, a mate got horribly drunk last week and needs a sick note for work. trouble is that as he was suffering from a hangover due to a good old wednesday night binge, the note is going to have to be a fake.

I tried to google them but didnt get anything.
Has anyone got any tips on what to do???
Was thinking along the lines of doing/writing something absolutley rediculous on it as he is leaving the job this friday and just wants the note to get paid

:rolleyes:

Quality

Write the note and say that he is suffering from a severe case of Vasocongestion....

:D:D

IanCurtis

Yeah, just go to a doctor with stomach problems. He'll give you a note no worries...

No worries!...class

Quality

MEDICAL CERTIFICATE


This is to certify that in my opinion

Mr/Mrs/Miss/Ms

Name:.......................................................
...............................................................
Address:...................................................
..............................................................
..............................................................
..............................................................
Is/Was Suffering From:................................
and is/was unable to attend work/school
From:...................... DOCTORS STAMP
To:........................

Signed: ...................
Date:.......................



this is the normal format...

Serious the vasocongestion means blueballs go for that one:D

hearto83

Quality wrote: »

Write the note and say that he is suffering from a severe case of Vasocongestion....

:D:D

Nice...this is the sort of stuff i'm looking for, especially seen as its a guy that its for! Or maybe Gulf War Syndrome or the plague???!!!

kizzyr

Go to your doctor say you had the winter vomiting bug and you'll get the cert no problem. It ususally last 36 hours and you have to be (where I work anyway) 48 hours symptom free before you're allowed back to work.

humberklog

Forge a doc note saying it's the worst case of malapropism he's ever witnessed. Originally the dr.diagnosed metamorphication til it dawned on him that the malapropism was contagious. At present both patient and dr.are in seclusion and having to communicate through 'speak and spell'boards.

Mr. CooL ICE

Tell him to say he is suffering from severe hypochondria and is on strict placebo medication for it