Quickies....

rocky25

A woman who had been married twice and divorced twice was fed up.
Her first husband beat her, and her second husband ran away with another woman.
Plus, she couldn't find a new lover who could satisfy her
sexually, so she put an ad in the classifieds:

Wanted: A good looking, single guy who won't beat me, won't leave me,
and is good in bed.
About a week later, her doorbell rings.

She opens the door to find a man with no arms and legs on her front porch.

"I'm here about your ad," he says.
"You must be mistaken," she says.
"Let me explain," he says. "I can't beat you, I don't have any arms.
And I can't run away because I don't have any legs."
"But," she asks, "How do I know you're good in bed?"







"I rang the doorbell, didn't I?"
_______________________________________________________________

A blonde was shopping and came across a silver Thermos. She was quite fascinated by it, so she picked it up and brought it over to the clerk to ask what it was.
“That’s a Thermos,” the clerk said. “It keeps some things hot and some things cold.”
“Wow” said the blonde. “That’s amazing. I’m going to buy it!”


So she bought the Thermos and took it to work the next day. Her boss saw it on her desk.
“What do you have there?” he asked.
“Why, that’s a Thermos. It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold,” she replied.
Her boss inquired,”What do you have in it?”





The blond replied, “Two popsicles and some coffee”.