Would you be annoyed if this happend...? would most girls?

LegacyUser

I slept over at my boyfriends house for the first time 2 weekends ago. We were friends for a couple of months before getting together and we get on really well. But when we were having sex, we were fairly quiet. I did deliberately keep my voice low, as his best friend sleeps in the room next to him, despite the fact that my boyfriend told me that the walls weren't that thin. I was speaking to him earlier and he said that his flatmate had heard everything word for word. I'm so embarrassed, as I was talking fairly dirty to him. And it was the time of the month too and we were talking about other intimate things. I feel so humiliated.
He's been living in the house since last year... surely he knows if a normal volume of voice can be heard (as his flatmate talks uses skype sometime anyway in the room next to his). Sorry if this sounds silly. I just wonder did he get some kick out of it or something. His best friend/flatmate could have said something after the 1st night... but instead decided to not say anything for 2 nights. And to think that they were talking about it.
He's almost 3 years younger (20) than me... I just think why on earth did he say it to me in the first place??? how on earth did he think I'd find that funny when it's something so personal? (and I have a very dark sense of humour and rarely get offended about anything, but this just really gets to me). I don't know what to say to him. I just feel disgusted. I'm just looking for some advice, as tbh, I'm not very comfortable going back there...it's just the thought of his flatmate listening... and then I can picture them having a good old laugh about it. I really wish he didn't tell me and say 'word for word'.

funk-you

heheardit wrote: »

I slept over at my boyfriends house for the first time 2 weekends ago. We were friends for a couple of months before getting together and we get on really well. But when we were having sex, we were fairly quiet. I did deliberately keep my voice low, as his best friend sleeps in the room next to him, despite the fact that my boyfriend told me that the walls weren't that thin. I was speaking to him earlier and he said that his flatmate had heard everything word for word. I'm so embarrassed, as I was talking fairly dirty to him. And it was the time of the month too and we were talking about other intimate things. I feel so humiliated.
He's been living in the house since last year... surely he knows if a normal volume of voice can be heard (as his flatmate talks uses skype sometime anyway in the room next to his). Sorry if this sounds silly. I just wonder did he get some kick out of it or something. His best friend/flatmate could have said something after the 1st night... but instead decided to not say anything for 2 nights. And to think that they were talking about it.
He's almost 3 years younger (20) than me... I just think why on earth did he say it to me in the first place??? how on earth did he think I'd find that funny when it's something so personal? (and I have a very dark sense of humour and rarely get offended about anything, but this just really gets to me). I don't know what to say to him. I just feel disgusted. I'm just looking for some advice, as tbh, I'm not very comfortable going back there...it's just the thought of his flatmate listening... and then I can picture them having a good old laugh about it. I really wish he didn't tell me and say 'word for word'.

He probably didn't hear "word for word" and your bf didn't say anything because he knew you wouldn't do anything if you knew. He was just trying to make you feel relaxed. I also do think they're laughing at you. I've heard plenty of my mates and they've heard me. It's not like his mates are your parents or something.

-Funk

Canis Lupus

Ah relax about it. It's nothing we haven't all heard before word for word or not.

Oriel

Learn to laugh it off.

JuliusCaesar

heheardit wrote: »

my boyfriend told me that the walls weren't that thin. .....................
he said that his flatmate had heard everything word for word. ...
surely he knows if a normal volume of voice can be heard ..............
I just wonder did he get some kick out of it or something. ............
to think that they were talking about it.
He's almost 3 years younger (20) than me... I just think why on earth did he say it to me in the first place???

weird. Either he knew the walls were thin or he didn't. He's been living there a long time so he knows they are thin, but told you they weren't.
I'd guess:
1 he's immature so
A he told you a lie so that he could 'impress' his flatmate
B he was embarrassed to tell you in the first place and now his conscience has kicked in

Either way, I'd be feeling the same way as you. There are things you just don't want to share with the wide world. That's why they're called intimate.:o

LadyJ

Sure it's embarrassing but this kinda thing happens to people all the time. Plus your boyfriend was probably so concerned about having sex with you that he really didn't think twice about whether his mate could hear anything or not.

I'm sure he didn't do it as a cruel joke or anything. Maybe it was a little insensitive of him but men don't think with their heads when they're aroused. Just do it in your gaff from now on if you're uncomfortable with the situation.

LegacyUser

It's normal, it happens to everyone.

My brother once walked past my room one morning after my girlfriend had stayed over and shouted in "Good morning animals", we laughed it off.

People have sex, people say dirty things, his flatmate probably had a ****.

LegacyUser

he probably told you nobody could hear anything because he knew you wouldnt relax before and youd get like this.
if his flatmate was slagging anyone, he was slagging your bf, whos telling you this because he probably forgot the above, becuase its not a big deal.
your not the first couple that have been heard and you wont be the last.

John Mason

LOL, you would hate my house so - we and my housemate here every single details of the sex

we just slag each other about it in the pub

aranidirlíon

seriously it happens to people all the time. my ex-house mates practically shook the house when they used to have sex. another time a friend of mine walked in on me having sex. morto!

you shouldn't let this get to you so much, relax and enjoy, hehe!

LegacyUser

Thanks, it's been interesting to read peoples replies.
Last night, after I had wrote that out (and before it actually appeared on boards), my bf texted just saying goodnight. I decided to reply saying that I felt humiliated about his friend knowing very intimate things about me etc and then we had a conversation... he said he couldn't sleep until it was sorted. We spoke for a while and the more it continued, the more ridiculous I told him it was all sounding...and I eventually saw the funny side to it! (although I did tell him I wish he never told me... it was something I could have done without knowing tbh... but he had said he thought we could 'share things like that'... I'm open and honest with him etc, but I think it's good to know when to shut up sometimes!). I then made a joke about the whole thing. So I think everything is ok now.
I'm actually really glad as this is the first sort of argument we had while going out so far and even though I was upset, I told him that I wasn't mad at him, just at the situation etc. And he was very understanding. We managed to sort it out by talking. The last guy I went out with could never deal with any sort of confrontation and he'd just let stuff build up, which is why I couldn't go out with him. I prefer to sort things out straight away if there's ever anything up when going out with someone... I'm glad my bf is the same... as some people will ignore each other etc and let things spiral (a situation I would never like to be in). JuliusCaesar- yeah, that's why I was annoyed, as being intimate with my bf was something I didn't want anyone else to be listening in on (as the whole reason it was special, was because it was just the 2 of us...)... the main thing is it's all ok now.

tbh

a happy ending nice one OP, sometimes it's hard to get a bit of perspective on situations like this when you are in the middle of them. One thing I've learned is never to say anything when I'm "thick" that I might want to retract when I'm calm. Things always look better in the morning. You played well, fair play.