Girlfriend on a hen...

DonMcC

Hey, dunno why I'm getting worked up about this but my girlfriend (of a year) is on a hen weekend and I haven't heard from her since Thursday...Should I be worried????

Oryx

DonMcC wrote: »

Hey, dunno why I'm getting worked up about this but my girlfriend (of a year) is on a hen weekend and I haven't heard from her since Thursday...Should I be worried????

Probably not, shes on the razz with her mates. Give her a call if youre really uptight?

briantwin

Probably not. Jesus its only saturday. send her a txt saying like "hope you're having a good one. Behave yourself :P "

Nothing serious just a little hello. now go watch the rugby and have a few cans with your mates!!

seamus

Don't worry about it. As KtK says, she's on the piss, having a bit of fun. She's probably too hungover during the day to ring you and then by the time she's feeling better, they're at dinner or something. She probably doesn't want to be standing there chatting on the phone while they all wait for her.

Give her a buzz at some point after lunch but before dinner. That way you probably won't be disturbing her and it doesn't look like you're checking up on her.

Sherifu

DonMcC wrote: »

Hey, dunno why I'm getting worked up about this but my girlfriend (of a year) is on a hen weekend and I haven't heard from her since Thursday...Should I be worried????

Only if you don't trust her, in which case why are you with her?

Balmed Out

Id say no unless shes the type that likes to be in contact several times a day.

babydoll2008

dont worry about it boy she's on a girly weekend getn in the horrors! relax about it! go watch the rugby match and have a lads weekend!
But if your really bothered just send a texting saying hope your having a laugh and not missing me too much :P [make a joke of it though].

SarahSassy

briantwin wrote: »

Probably not. Jesus its only saturday. send her a txt saying like "hope you're having a good one. Behave yourself :P "

Nothing serious just a little hello. now go watch the rugby and have a few cans with your mates!!

+1

CiaraT80

briantwin wrote: »

Probably not. Jesus its only saturday. send her a txt saying like "hope you're having a good one. Behave yourself :P "

Nothing serious just a little hello. now go watch the rugby and have a few cans with your mates!!

+2

SarahSassy

babydoll2008 wrote: »

send a texting saying hope your having a laugh and not missing me too much :P [make a joke of it though].

Actually this si better.

JMCD

Im going to say the opposite to nearly everybody else and say ring her!

Not even to make sure she is behaving herself but to make sure she is alright and safe. Would she usually leave it this long without contacting you?

cowzerp

If there is nothing wrong with her its pretty selfish of her not ringing to say she was o'k, she obviously is not that close to you..

JMCD

cowzerp wrote: »

If there is nothing wrong with her its pretty selfish of her not ringing to say she was o'k, she obviously is not that close to you..

Thats what Im thinking.........a quick call at or at the very very least a text. If I went anymore than a day without hearing from my gf I would be worried unless we were fighting! And this girl is gone away.............!:eek:

AARRRGH

How often do you normally communicate with each other?

I find it a bit odd she hasn't sent a text to say she's OK etc...

Dudess

Where's the hen? Is there a possibility it could be in an area with poor mobile phone coverage?

funloving

cowzerp wrote: »

If there is nothing wrong with her its pretty selfish of her not ringing to say she was o'k, she obviously is not that close to you..

+10

Jack B. Badd

cowzerp wrote: »

If there is nothing wrong with her its pretty selfish of her not ringing to say she was o'k, she obviously is not that close to you..

I'm surprised she would have gone away without you at all actually. Does she not realise that when people are in relationships they spend 24/7 with their SO and if for some reason (presumably life threatening) they must part temporarily they should make contact on an hourly basis? Realistically, of course, if you're in love with someone you'd never last a whole hour without talking about them.

[/sarcasm]

OP, just give her a quick buzz to see if she's having a good time. She'll probably appreciate the fact that you're thinking of her.

Rb

It really depends on how much you communicate in general with her, as others have said.

My own girlfriend and I are almost in constant communication, email at work, text/calls outside work and then we live together (and we're together a year too), so I'd certainly want to know what the story was if I didn't hear from her for two or three days. If you've tried to contact her already and she hasn't replied then there'd definitely be cause for concern but as someone else said above, in general if you haven't heard from her in such an amount of time then you're really not as close to eachother as you might think tbh.

Barlow07

DonMcC wrote: »

Hey, dunno why I'm getting worked up about this but my girlfriend (of a year) is on a hen weekend and I haven't heard from her since Thursday...Should I be worried????

She is gone for the weekend, where's the trust? I wouldnt worry, when she walks in door if she looks or acts guilty then id start to worry :rolleyes:

Gyalist

Actually, I'm wondering why *she* hasn't been ringing to see what you were up to while she's been away. Seems like she took your balls with her.

Toots

Ah that's mean! Like Dudess said she may just have no coverage. If she went to NI or abroad and didn't have roaming her phone wouldn't work anyway. If it was me though, I'd give my BF a quick call just to say hello and let him know I'm ok.

fuzzywiggle

Give her a ring or a text.. just to say you were a bit concerned.

Whether drunk, hung over or just out and about it's no excuse not to give you a quick text...AT LEAST!

Jack B. Badd

Gyalist wrote: »

Actually, I'm wondering why *she* hasn't been ringing to see what you were up to while she's been away. Seems like she took your balls with her.

Yes, god knows a man isn't a real man unless he's cheating on his girlfriend while she's away O_o

greenkittie

Jack B. Badd wrote: »

I'm surprised she would have gone away without you at all actually. Does she not realise that when people are in relationships they spend 24/7 with their SO and if for some reason (presumably life threatening) they must part temporarily they should make contact on an hourly basis? Realistically, of course, if you're in love with someone you'd never last a whole hour without talking about them.

[/sarcasm]

I dunno if what you said sarcasticly is totally wrong, my parents have been together a very long time and this is actually the way they act and they are probably the happiest couple ive ever met. The amount of contact you like to have with your partner is different for everyone.

On the topic, even if she is off with her friends i think you are right to expect at least a message just to check in and say hi.

Gyalist

Jack B. Badd wrote: »

Yes, god knows a man isn't a real man unless he's cheating on his girlfriend while she's away O_o

I suppose that is one interpretation of what I wrote. However, that is certainly not what I meant. What i meant is that a man should have so many other interests and activities that the temporary absence of his wife/partner/girlfriend shouldn't be a cause for alarm because he has other fulfilling things to take care of.

scoot on

TBH I think it's fairly inconsiderate not to txt or phone to say that you arrived ok or that you're still alive. I'd always make sure to txt or phone my bf just in case he'd be worried about me.

Mike...

If she comes back walking like John Wayne then signs are she had a good weekend..

Jack B. Badd

Gyalist wrote: »

I suppose that is one interpretation of what I wrote. However, that is certainly not what I meant. What i meant is that a man should have so many other interests and activities that the temporary absence of his wife/partner/girlfriend shouldn't be a cause for alarm because he has other fulfilling things to take care of.

Well, in that case I actually agree with your sentiments but tbh your post came across as meaning something very different.

WhiteWashMan

Has she made contact with you so far, or have you talked to her?

Personally, it would be a very very very rare day where I did not have some sort of communication with my wife. Even if its a single text at bedtime to tell her I love her when she was on the other side of the planet for a month. But usually, we arent out of communication for more than about 12 hours at a time.

If youre like that, it would be odd not to have communication.

Of course, if you go a few days without communicating, then it sounds normal. although, with all the drink thats consummed, id say that when she is drunk, thats usually a good time for people to text their partners and tell them they miss them.
perhaps she doesnt miss you?

or perhaps she home already. who knows. tell us whats happened.

scoot on

WhiteWashMan wrote: »

Has she made contact with you so far, or have you talked to her?

Personally, it would be a very very very rare day where I did not have some sort of communication with my wife. Even if its a single text at bedtime to tell her I love her when she was on the other side of the planet for a month. But usually, we arent out of communication for more than about 12 hours at a time.

If youre like that, it would be odd not to have communication.

Of course, if you go a few days without communicating, then it sounds normal. although, with all the drink thats consummed, id say that when she is drunk, thats usually a good time for people to text their partners and tell them they miss them.
perhaps she doesnt miss you?

or perhaps she home already. who knows. tell us whats happened.

If I was the OP that's actually what would worry me. Normally when I go out or go away with the girls it's i'll annoy my bf with drunken txts or drunken phone calls. It's the dreaded "I wish I left the phone at home" kinda communication but it's still communication of some sort.

Seraphina

really? cause im the total opposite.

when i go out without a partner when i have one, i usually take it as an opportunity to have some fun and get some space. when you're away with your mates i dont see the point of constantly being on the phone to someone who isn't there, especially as when i have a bf i would often see them more than some of my mates. he'll be there when you get back, why the need to text/call tell him you miss him/let him know whatever menial ****e you're at right now.

i'm of the opinion that if i'm bored enough to take out my phone and start texting someone, i'm not having a good time.

St Bill

Hi OP, if it's a thing that she normally does keep in regular contact, well then give her a ring to see how she's doing. Maybe the hen party has a 'no talking to the other half' policy! They're out for a girlie weekend, and it's not a proper girlie weekend if you're on the phone to your boyfriend

DonMcC

Hey guys, thanks for all the replies. Texted her last night just to say I hoped she was having a good time and she rang me after. Just having too much of a good time ! I know I shouldn't have been worried, was in a wierd mood or something. Thanks again...

cowzerp

DonMcC wrote: »

Hey guys, thanks for all the replies. Texted her last night just to say I hoped she was having a good time and she rang me after. Just having too much of a good time ! I know I shouldn't have been worried, was in a wierd mood or something. Thanks again...

No, you where right to be worried-that imo was very selfish of her, you did not come into consideration because she was having a good time!!

SarahSassy

cowzerp wrote: »

No, you where right to be worried-that imo was very selfish of her, you did not come into consideration because she was having a good time!!

Ah hello, where is it written in the bible that you have to contact your boyfriend when you are out of his company for more than 24 hours.

OP, you sound possessive, maybe she needed a couple of days break from you.

funloving

cowzerp wrote: »

No, you where right to be worried-that imo was very selfish of her, you did not come into consideration because she was having a good time!!

+1

..the thought of you didn't even cross her mind....:(

Jack B. Badd

cowzerp wrote: »

No, you where right to be worried-that imo was very selfish of her, you did not come into consideration because she was having a good time!!

Do you ring your parents when you're away having a good weekend? Your siblings? All your mates? Not ringing any of these people, who presumably are a big part of one's life, could be construed as being selfish if you're inclined to think that way. Though if you do think that way, you'll probably spend most of your life on the phone rather than actually living it.

scoot on

Seraphina wrote: »

really? cause im the total opposite.

when i go out without a partner when i have one, i usually take it as an opportunity to have some fun and get some space. when you're away with your mates i dont see the point of constantly being on the phone to someone who isn't there, especially as when i have a bf i would often see them more than some of my mates. he'll be there when you get back, why the need to text/call tell him you miss him/let him know whatever menial ****e you're at right now.

i'm of the opinion that if i'm bored enough to take out my phone and start texting someone, i'm not having a good time.

Oh I wouldn't be on the phone to him constantly. If I was away for a few days though and was on the lash with the girls I would phone him once a night though just to say hello and let know i'm ok.

St Bill

I think it's healthy to have time apart (with no contact if that's the way it turns out, as in the OP's case) from your partner i.e. as in a weekend. Otherwise you're just living in each other's pockets.

Rubens

DonMcC wrote: »

Girlfriend on a hen...

As long as she's not on a c*ck you're alright.


Boom Boom
Sorry its worth the ban ...

Fishyfreak

Hi i would be worryed to. If my boyfriend was away i would expect a phone call every day. even just a hello.

cowzerp

Jack B. Badd wrote: »

Do you ring your parents when you're away having a good weekend? Your siblings? All your mates? Not ringing any of these people, who presumably are a big part of one's life, could be construed as being selfish if you're inclined to think that way. Though if you do think that way, you'll probably spend most of your life on the phone rather than actually living it.

I dont talk to all them everyday but i do talk to my partner everyday, i would contact her at least once and would expect the same from her, im very close with her and we are together 8 years, i dont think we have gone more than a day without talking at least once..when im away i contact family as often as i would when at home!

Jack B. Badd

cowzerp wrote: »

I dont talk to all them everyday but i do talk to my partner everyday, i would contact her at least once and would expect the same from her, im very close with her and we are together 8 years, i dont think we have gone more than a day without talking at least once..when im away i contact family as often as i would when at home!

In that case, you seem to be holding the OP's romantic relationship to the standards of your own. Since the OP hasn't indicated his usual level of contact with his girlfriend it's a bit soon to be judging her (or him, since as far as we know at the time of his first post he hadn't called or texted her either) as selfish for not initiating contact.
Some people are happy to take some time away from their partner, whether it's time with their friends or on their own. In some cases, that means no contact by phone either. It depends on the relationship. Just because you talk to your partner every day doesn't mean every one does.

In any case, the OP got in contact with his girlfriend and all is well so the issue is pretty much academic now...

cowzerp

well he had a problem with it so thats telling you something.

Marksie

cowzerp wrote: »

well he had a problem with it so thats telling you something.

Take it to PM.

WhiteWashMan

Seraphina wrote: »

when i go out without a partner when i have one,.

no offence, but when i see a statement like that, I tend to think that youre probably not the type of person who really commits themselves to a partner at this time of your life.

and thats fine. there is no problem with that at all.

But if you are in a committed relationship, I think its a little bit different, and your thinking is different.

SarahSassy wrote:

Ah hello, where is it written in the bible that you have to contact your boyfriend when you are out of his company for more than 24 hours.

OP, you sound possessive, maybe she needed a couple of days break from you.

its not written anywhere. on the other hand, if you can show me where you dont have to contact them, then I reckon you will have a valid point.

Some people like to have contact. there is nothing wrong, and it doesnt make you possessive. Thats just simply a silly thing to say. Looking back over this thread, youve just tarred the majority of posters as obsessives. Which is clearly untrue. Im not possessive, but i call my missus when im away simply becuase I love her, I want to hear her voice and I want to catch up with her.

Doesnt mean you expect a time check every 30 minutes and an update on who she is talking to or doing.

Besides, I actually dont enjoy going out without her much. I'll go out for a few beers, no worries, but on a big night out, I actually feel as if im missing something if my missus isnt there, simply becuase we share so much, and we enjoy each other company.

Jack B. Badd wrote:

Do you ring your parents when you're away having a good weekend? Your siblings? All your mates? Not ringing any of these people, who presumably are a big part of one's life, could be construed as being selfish if you're inclined to think that way. Though if you do think that way, you'll probably spend most of your life on the phone rather than actually living it.

not the same type of relationship at all, but as it happens, a lot of people are like that, which I suppose doubly invalidates your point.

as for living on the phone instead of not living your life, well, horses for courses. Unless youre going to start giving lifestyle lessons, I reckon people are allowed to do as they wish.

Jack B. Badd wrote:

In that case, you seem to be holding the OP's romantic relationship to the standards of your own.

romantic? whats romantic about communication? I dont see your point here.

Jack B. Badd wrote:

Since the OP hasn't indicated his usual level of contact with his girlfriend it's a bit soon to be judging her (or him, since as far as we know at the time of his first post he hadn't called or texted her either) as selfish for not initiating contact.

I dont see him judging the OP, you are. the fact that the OP felt that something was wrong is enough surely. You seem to be mixing his views on it, up with yours...

Marksie wrote:

Take it to PM.

on the contrary, its a good discussion point, and its on topic.

Xavi6

Fishyfreak wrote: »

Hi i would be worryed to. If my boyfriend was away i would expect a phone call every day. even just a hello.

Every day? That's a bit clingy to be honest. What if there's a big time difference or there are activities he is taking place in that don't give him a minute to ring? A holiday is meant to be a break from the norm. Every 2 or 3 days is sufficient. A quick text fair enough but not a phone call. I wouldn't expect my gf to ring me every day either.

Victor

Rubens, behave.

LegacyUser

OP, I would get a little worried if I didnt even get a text off her tbh....

I was with some savage bride-to-be there not too long ago in Club M, after that I kinda started thinkin "if I can score some cracker thats gettin married very soon, there must be problems in the world of wimmins!"

She was English and wanted a last night of freedom etc yadda yadda....

So I of course gave it to her, and gave it to her good!

Food for thought....

evry1sm8

The above post makes me sick!
How can someone be so committed to a person they are willing to marry them, and still cheat ruthlessly on their hen night????
Im shocked.

JackieO

I think it all comes down to the established level of communication in a relationship. If this guy is used to speaking to his GF every day then he is right to be slightly concerned about not hearing from her in a few days.

If he doesn't speak to her every single day then she probably felt it unnecessary to call him. And remember there is the whole thing of girls slagging off each other for being on the phone to their BF's on such occassions. You also have to wonder if he is a little bit more insecure having not heard from her simply because she is on a "hen w'end". I'm sure if she was on a religious pilgrimage for the weekend he wouldn't be quite so concerned.

If this is early days in the relationship, I would also say that she is possibly playing him out to see if he would contact her first - her idea of a test I would think.

My BF (of 5 mths) would not go away without contacting me at least once a day. But that was his choice. In the early days, I would tell him he needn't bother calling say if he was away on a lads weekend or night away. I think because of me saying that to him he ended up wanting to call me even more!!