First Date...

LegacyUser

sorry

I`m goin to be goin out with a girl my friend knows in the next few weeks, and i dont know much about her, but he said were quite similar, and from the things hes told me, it seems like we are. shes kinda "weird", and seems quite unique, and i myself am slightly "weird" (from what i hear ) and i really wanna get to know her. so i was just wonderin if someone could suggest one or two general questions to ask her, but stuff unlike "hows college goin?" or general things like that, just stuff that will get her talkin about herself. Goin to the movies, and need more to talk about than "that was great/terrible" . I keep just thinkin bout hobbies but wanna go past it too.

biko

"You look really nice, where did you get ....(item in question)?" - This will give the person a chance to think and talk about it and tell you the details plus s/he would be happy at the compliment.

"Have you seen any movie recently? How did you like it?" - They will definitely like to talk about the movie s/he liked and can talk in detail.

"What kind of music you like?" - This is an opportunity for her/him to share the interest which might be interested for you too.

"What interesting things did you do this weekend (week)?" - Another opportunity to talk about the fun things being done and people usually love sharing the fun part with everybody.

"What do you normally do for fun?" - Obviously getting a chance to talk about hobby and one is passionate talking about it.

"Do you have any pets?" - Start up of a lively conversation because people love their pets and love talking about them even more. If they don't have any pets then just move on to something else. Or, you could ask, Really? Why not?"

"Have you ever....?" - Ask about something that you are knowledgeable about or enjoy doing. This is a good way to find out if you have common ground. If they do have that interest in common with you then you can talk about it a little and then move onto something else.

"Do you like sports?" - Both men and women are passionate about sports and all enthusiasts enjoy talking about them. May be you both enjoy the same sport and then why not buy tickets and go to a game for your next date?

"Have you ever been to....?" - Ask them if they have ever been to a local hotspot that you enjoy. Maybe it's a club, restaurant, or amusement park. If she hasn't been there, then this is another great way to get a second date.

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LegacyUser

biko wrote: »

"You look really nice, where did you get ....(item in question)?" - This will give the person a chance to think and talk about it and tell you the details plus s/he would be happy at the compliment.

Personally I WOULD NOT ask that, if a bloke asked me where I bought an item of clothing I would be kinda worried...

If the dates goin well I always find a (moderatly tame version of course..) game of "would you rather" is fun, ye can start it off by sayin u n ur mates were discussing some before...

Miss Fluff

biko wrote: »

"You look really nice, where did you get ....(item in question)?" - This will give the person a chance to think and talk about it and tell you the details plus s/he would be happy at the compliment.]

Erm no. In fact NO WAY should you ask that question OP.

Be yourself, find a really good movie to go to and keep questions to non monosyllabic answer questions, get her to talk about herself. You will be fine.

briantwin

Ask her "how would you eat yours?"
the usual response being about cadburys creme eggs.

once she's finished describing it, look at her with disgust and say "i was talking about your first born.........jesus christ!"

King of Kings

GET DRUNK and let her yap. ask questions and appear interested. it helps a great deal if you are actually interested.

it worked for me at the start of dec and still going strong.
But i had met her once with my mate and his wife - who set us up - Id be afeared of going on a total blind date.
Maybe for first time bring your mate and his gf along so not too much pressure.

dar_cool

DO NOT I REPEAT DO NOT go to the cinema on the first date..its the most awkward thing ever..haha
i agree..go have a few drinks..maybe have a can or 2 before so you will loosen up but dont go up to her locked..haha:D

thecheese

Yeah if you have never met the girl, I would definately suggest going for food/coffee before the cinema as the cinema alone can be quite an awkward first date.

Daithio

Don't go in to it with learnt off lines or particular questions to ask. Just ask her about herself, and listen to what she says, take an interest in her. Try not to talk about yourself too much. It's very easy to do when you're nervous but it doesn't come across very well. Of course if she asks tell her about yourself, but try not to bring the conversation back to you too often.

Also I'd recommend not going to the cinema, I find it a really awkward place to go on a first date. Much better off going to a bustly enough pub with a bit of atmosphere, but that you can still talk in. Have a couple of drinks and you'll be fine then. If you don't hit it off you don't hit it off, it's not the end of the world.

EDIT to add, remember she'll be just as nervous as you are too.

Robbiethe3rd

Have a really interesting week the wek before the date, do loads of things you maybe wouldnt normally do.
this way you actually will naturally have loads to talk about (just be careful it doesnt give a false impression!)

MattKid

Tell your funniest most embarrassing story about yourself. It will

1. Make her laugh
2. Show you're not perfect, making her feel more comfortable
3. Show you as being confident enough to show your flaws and be ok about it.
4. Encourage her to share about herself.

Ask open ended questions and make statements. It makes it less like an interview.

If you are going to complement, complement something personal, that she has some control over, rather than just being lucky in the gene pool lottery.

Handlestash

Why do you think you'll need topics going in?
Seriously, if you're that much alike you'll got on great. Even if you're not you'll still have a good time (unless you have nothing in common and the conversation just dies).
Just start with hello, move to the college thing or what ever and see where it goes from there.
It's just a conversation like any other.
Don't start with something like 'you smell good' for god sake.
You need to find out if your interested in her and vice versa before you move onto that kind of thing.
Although something like 'I like your coat' won't hurt but again, not first thing.
Start with hello. Girls love a bit of hello.
Good luck man.

Wilba

Yep,

I went to the movies with this girl before but the thing is we fooled around and got to know each other for months prior to going to the movies. So when we watched the movie, it wasn't that awkward.

What you could do is get a quick bite to eat first (doesn't have to be a restaurant), it can be hotdog or an ice cream, that way you both have had enough time to relax and to know each other a little bit.

Once you have done so you can approach the cinema. good luck with it.

slemons

dude,
say hi, how are you?
And thats it...

If you actually listen to her reply and the tone she says it in, a conversation will spring up right away.

Now at the start you might have to talk a lot until she warms up to the conversation. Dont expect her to talk a lot at the start. But if you jabber on for a bit then soon she will start to open up.

Everybody has something in common with someone else. They all share emotions. You might not have done the exact same things as someone else but you have felt scared, thrilled, happy etc.

Base your conversations of feelings not actual expierences and you're sorted.

In general Dont ever ask questions starting with "what", "who", "when", "where". Instead use "how" or "why". Basically dont ask questions that one word can answer. And let her answer the questions dude.
Dont barge in and answer the question yourself for her.

Dont push your opinions on her. Dont say "that was a great dinner, wasnt it?" Ask "how did you find the meal?"

Good luck

Ps - Eye contact is crucial. Body language and tone of voice is equally as important. What you say is almost irrevelant compared to how you say it. You could tell the funniest joke ever, in a father stone voice and no-one will laugh. Or you could tell the worst joke ever, in a humorous way and everyone will laugh.

That may be a bad example, because you shouldnt ever "perform" for a girl. Unless you're a rockstar, she'll just think you're a clown. But i hope you get the point about body language and tone