A random girl that wont go away

LegacyUser

Hey There,

The title isn't what you think it might suggest - quite the opposite really.

I was out last Wednesday night and I scored with such an attractive girl and we talked a lot but I was a bit drunk, well no really drunk I think. Basically I'm getting a lot of flash backs as the days go on now, and it seems we talked a lot. Unfortunately I left her go without getting a number and I'm really upset now because of this.

Right, before I go further - I'm 21 year old male in 3rd year college doing a computing course. This has not helped with my confidence with girls and at the moment I am feeling really lonely. I had a girlfriend when I was 16 but that was just a friendship. I'm in a lot of need of someone to care bout me. My class at college is very small - and we don't get out much but I did move into an appartment with my old friends that I've had most of my life.

They are constantly telling me to go out find a girl - that I'm attractive enough , but I just don't approach girls. I've so little confidence when approaching a girl. Any girl that is attractive and that I find there is a potential chance of getting together - I ruin it by either not going up to them saying what I think or making a fool of my self.

I am not a big drinker at all and don't go out that often due to the long hours in college. I am beginning to think though that drinking is the only way that I will be comfortable enough. I feel that life is passing me away and things are getting more difficult all the time.

But back to this girl, she seemed really nice and she told me her name, where she works etc. (It is about a hour drive away - she only came to meet her friends out and she isn't going to college - she taking year out.)
She was the one that approached me first, got me to sit down and talk and then she waited around until the end and I scored with her outside. I could have scored with her inside too but I cannot remember - because of the drink

It took about 2 days to realise what a stupid mistake I've made - not getting a number. I wish I could have gone back and asked but I guess it is too late now. Then I remember she told me her name and where she worked so one evening bored I decided to google search her on bebo and i find her - I wish I didn't now as she is so beautiful looking and she looks so genuine. Now I am getting worried that I'm some sort of bebo/online stalker or something.

She is even on MSN (it on her bebo page) - but I won't contact her because I'm scared on how she would react. Amnt I right in thinking that she would go crazy and think I'm some sort of stalker? I really do wish I didn't find her page as I cannot stop thinking of her now - Its driving me crazy and distracting me a lot.

It has woken me up on why I've being down all these years - its because I need to feel loved. I just want someone to care for me and have someone to talk to and be happy and proud with.

I wouldn't have written this, only I was reading a previous poster's thread there - "I am a social disaster" or something - and well It seems like I wrote it. Then I looked at the Seduction School thing on youtube that one of the following posters posted and well - it seems unreal what they seem to think is acceptable - like going up to a girl/complete stranger in the day time, touching them by the arm and asking them their name.

Am I over thinking all of this - do girls not get freaked so easily.

I just had to write this somewhere to get it off my chest.

By the way I'm a virgin as well - no wonder :-(

Thanks so much for reading if you did.

Esel

I don't think she would think you were a stalker if you contacted her to say "Hi, remember me?". If you persisted, that would be a different story.

Miss Fluff

Stop being so hard on yourself OP! Contact her through bebo, tell her you regret not asking her for her number but you was hoping you might find her on bebo. If shes doesn't respond just leave it but I think its fine to at least give it a try. It would only be weird if you then kept contacting her if she doesn't reply. Good luck:)

m83

add her as a friend on bebo, if she accepts then ur well in! go for it or you WILL regret this! and don't dilly dally, gott strike while the iron is hottttttt!!!! rrraawwwrrrr!!

Nerin

Stop being so hard on yourself OP! Contact her through bebo, tell her you regret not asking her for her number but you was hoping you might find her on bebo. If shes doesn't respond just leave it but I think its fine to at least give it a try. It would only be weird if you then kept contacting her if she doesn't reply.

Do it... now!
Relax, play it cool, start chatting to her. if you do try it on and it doesnt go anywhere, its not big enough to worry about.
You sir are a worrier, and thats ok, dont let the worry rule you though.
Plenty more fish etc etc but totally make her your number one target.
(puts up shield from ladies who think my language is to cold and clinical)

kev_s88

what do you have to lose if you contact her???

look at it this way....you have 3 main outcomes:

1.you dont contact her and you let it slide and everything gets forgotten and you've possibly lost the love of your life.

2.you contact her and she tells you that shes not interested.at least you have closure and you know you're not missing out on anything.

3.you contact her and things go well.you meet up and you really like eachother.you get what you wanted and find someone to care for you and love you.

outcome 1 is the worst because you're left wondering.my advice is to just add her on bebo.if things dont work out then at least you know.if things do work out then you're sorted

good luck with whatever choice you make

starlight07

As another poster said, just add her as a friend... ahhhh go on!! Sure what have ye got to lose... let us know how it goes

GAAman

Man go for it whats the worst thing that can happen? She says no, calls the cops for stalkin, they crash through your front windows ala die hard etc, possibly riddle you with bullets from some cool lookin automatic weapons.........

Nah but seriously go for it man even just say you were lookin across bebo and came across her page all innocent like i cant count how many friends from way back i have found on bebo

http://i73.photobucket.com/albums/i233/rachel1919/funny%20stuff/you-can-do-it.jpg

aye

OP, i had a similar situation a few years back.
pretty much the same thing, this was before bebo tho.
i knew where she worked, so i just rang the office and asked for her.
she was a bit shocked but pleased i rang, and followed up.
i got the date and we ended up going out for a while.

point is you wont know until you try.
if you dont try, you'll always wonder.

CrazyNoob

OP just send her a SHORT email, a novel wont work or confessing you love her or are thinking about her for ages no no no
Here I'll do it for you


Hiya X here from the other night (name of place), I had a great night, sorry I forgot to get your number, I was wondering if you'd like to go out some time?
Sure send me your number and I'll ring and ask you out properly


At the very least you'll get your answer
if she sends you her number RING her dont txt like a knob at the very least it shows confidence and you know you already have it in the bag!
Good Luck

Overheal

You have already gotten through the hurdles here of finding a girl and your going to let yourself continue getting stuck on the first hurdle of saying 'Hi'?

*smack*

To the bebos!

Niamho!

Yeah i say do it.
People know how easy it is to be found on Bebo and other such sites. so she'll understand.
i'd be the same if i remembered some Hottie's name! i'd have no hesitation in having a quick look to see have they got a page.

jdivision

she snogged you cos she liked you. Get on with it.

Rattlehead_ie

I'm 21 year old male in 3rd year college doing a computing course. This has not helped with my confidence with girls and at the moment I am feeling really lonely.

Why does being in a computer course not help your confidence, be a nerd and proud of it I am ........................ kinda :cool:

As the rest of the posters said, there is no reason why you can't add her to your bebo friends and even say hello. Go for it dude and let us know how you get on.

Cianos

Bebo and other social networking sites are seen as fairly normal methods of communication at this stage. People are generally getting over the stigma surrounding the interweb as a means to initiate interaction with someone. So, as far as I see it (and I'd bet she would think the same), there's nothing wrong with finding someone via Bebo....it's the same as looking them up in a phonebook.

And just say something along the lines of;

'Hey, this is XXXXXX from (whatever bar or club it was). I had a lot of fun hanging out with you and for some unknown reason forgot to ask you for your number! Hope you're keeping well'

(I'd also try a playful/jokey reference to her profile picture or something)

(don't ask her out in the first message as someone above suggested...you have to build a bit of comfort first. In your 2nd or 3rd message you should ask her out, or ask her for her number...don't leave it longer than that because you don't want to make her feel that you are trying to get to know her over the internet)

Also, make sure you have a really good photo of yourself on your profile!

Good luck.

P.S Don't leave this any longer...send the first message ASAP

geminilady

I think u should bebo her! sure whats the harm! at least u can say u tried!

Lollipops23

Add her on bebo!!!!do it!think what you could be missing!!!

LegacyUser

Thanks so much for all your replies!

I really though I would be seeing negative replies but not even one there, amazing.
I sent her an email via Bebo just saying a little Hi. I hope she sees it now and reply.

You have really waken me up - I am such a worrier and tend to over think about things and drive myself insane. I cant wait to see the outcome even if its a bad one - at least I tried

I will let ye know how I get on.

Thanks once again!

Placebo

scored with her ? what lingo is this ?

anyway was it in crawdaddy ?

Susannahmia

Miss Fluff wrote: »

Stop being so hard on yourself OP! Contact her through bebo, tell her you regret not asking her for her number but you was hoping you might find her on bebo. If shes doesn't respond just leave it but I think its fine to at least give it a try. It would only be weird if you then kept contacting her if she doesn't reply. Good luck:)

+1 good advice.

Cianos

AmIWierd wrote: »

Thanks so much for all your replies!

I really though I would be seeing negative replies but not even one there, amazing.
I sent her an email via Bebo just saying a little Hi. I hope she sees it now and reply.

You have really waken me up - I am such a worrier and tend to over think about things and drive myself insane. I cant wait to see the outcome even if its a bad one - at least I tried

I will let ye know how I get on.

Thanks once again!

Great. Hope it goes well, good luck;)

kev_s88

congrats.hope it goes well for you

keep us posted on the outcome

LegacyUser

Hey there,

She replied and well she can't remember me well (drink!) but she talking way - never know i guess but I'm happy now.

Thanks for all the help people.