Childhood lost - Could a hypnotist help?

LegacyUser

Hi

Long time member etc etc....

But, my head is wrecked to say the least.

I'm 28 and though things have been relatively ok for the last while, I still feel a certain uneasiness in myself.

Have had some ****ty relationships (haven't we all?) but also some ****ed up stuff with my parents.

Basically, my father died a couple of years ago and my mother, I sometimes think, is on the way out too. (She was on death's door at the same time as my father but now is a little better, but for how long, no one knows)

But the reason for my posting is that I'm worried about my recollections of my childhood and teenager years.

I remember very little. And that's my hang up.

I remember the last 2 years ok but my childhood is a mesh or patched quilt of memories and I'm wondering is this for a specific reason or is this common?

I have some concerns about a certain neighbour of mine touching me in certain places and me feeling very uncomfortable about that at the time.

But I don't want to make certain things that I have a vague recollection of to be what they're not.

And I will say that certain things that my parents did to me (not physically or sexually) still do leave a mark on me to this day but at the same time they grew up in a different era to me, but I do have a large resentment towards them as a result.

Basically, what I'm asking is, is it possible for a hypnotist to "drag" these sorts of things out of a person?

My father is dead and my mother more or less want's to be but, I would like to try and find these things out for myself, as opposed to a person who is in need of some sort of revenge against his parents.

Sorry if this makes no sense.

Marksie

I am not sure a hypnotist would be the right way to go per se.

A professional counsellor or therapist may be the best, though they may use hypnosis.
the reason i say this is that if a memory is dragged up you are going to have to deal with it.
In that case you may want to have somene there who can help you deal with it and who is qualiified to do so.
I have had situations in my oown practices where i have jhad a memmory come through or a repressed feeling (e.g. grief over a lost loved one). I had to explore and work through it.
In your situation, with so many possible negative memories its best that you have somene who can help you deal with them.

Miss Fluff

Regression therapy may be an idea BUT I'd be very careful about the therapist you choose.

Odysseus

Just concurring with the above post, go to a good therapist there is a lot of controversy about "revovered memories" under hypnosis. A lot of people say the they remember little of their childhood when the enter therapy, but find that through the process of working through what they do remember their memory expands significantly. Best of luck with it.

Esel

As an adult, you should consider talking about these issues with your mother. She may remember more than you, or may be able to help you fill in the blanks so to speak.

Also, you might be able to resolve some issues you have with her.

Writing a letter to your father might help also. Obviously you won't be sending this, or showing it to anyone else. It may help you achieve some closure on issues you may have with him.

JuliusCaesar

Odysseus wrote: »

Just concurring with the above post, go to a good therapist there is a lot of controversy about "revovered memories" under hypnosis. A lot of people say the they remember little of their childhood when the enter therapy, but find that through the process of working through what they do remember their memory expands significantly. Best of luck with it.

this is recent reputable research on the 'recovered memory' question.

http://crimepsychblog.com/?p=1590

They found that spontanaeously recovered memories were generally found to be true, but that 'memories recovered' in therapy could not be corroborated at all.

My own childhood memories are patchy - much to the dissapointment of my mother. My childhood was happy and yet I only remember a few incidents. I don't remember any birthday parties for example and yet they happened & the photos are there to prove it!

Odysseus

Hi Julis, when you say therapy do you mean hypnosis, as oppossed to talking therapies in general? Cheers for the link I'll check it out later. My own experience of 5 years of analysis and of others is the more work one engages in the more you come to remember. Then of course there is the whole notion of screen memories but I know your not a fan of Freud;)

JuliusCaesar

I'm not a fan of hypnosis as a technique in 'recovering memories' as there are a lot of studies showing that that in a state of trance, the hypnotised person will confabulate in order to please the hypnotist. Look up studies showing eye-witnesses and hypnotism, where people will 'remember' the licence plate of a car even though they didn't see it and couldn't have seen it from the angle where they were. They will even 'remember' car accidents which never happened under subtle hints from the hypnotist. Like 'cold reading' it's a murky field. The Skeptics forum will have lots on this.

Sorry for deviating from the topic. Will stop now!

Xhristy

This post has been deleted.

LegacyUser

Thanks for the replies folks.

I suppose it makes more sense to go a professional therapist as opposed to a hypnotist. Will probably do that if at all.

Whatever about the neighbour having done anything to me, I think another reason I may block things out from my childhood is having seen my mother constantly crying and in and out of hospital since I was born. She has chronic depression which started off as post natal after having me. She's had it bad for all that time with the occasional good streak but mostly down. This culminated in a series of suicide attempts in the last few years.

But seeing her that way was painful for me and maybe I'm blocking out my childhood as a result of that but I don't feel I'm doing this consciously. In fact, maybe I've not blocked anything at all but what I remember from my young years pales in comparison to my friends.

Thus, I might go to a therapist/counsellor and investigate if further. Though I will have to think about that seriously.

Thanks for the suggestions and help.

tbh

All fall wrote: »

I remember very little. And that's my hang up.

I remember the last 2 years ok but my childhood is a mesh or patched quilt of memories and I'm wondering is this for a specific reason or is this common?

If it helps, I had a happy childhood, and I'm like that too. I have snapshots in my head, but I couldn't tell you what I was like or what I was into when I was 14-15-16 etc. I'm 33 now.