Dont know how to feel

LegacyUser

Hi Guys,

Just looking for a bit of advice on this one... Me and my bf broke up last yr and although a messy break up we remained good friends and would always have a bit of craic on nights out etc

Just before summer I felt we had both changed and I thought if we gave things another chance we would be great together however he said too much had gone on and he felt differently which is fine, I gave it a shot. We have the same circle of friends so we see each other all the time. Eventually he started seeing someone else as did I, nothing serious. And even though it was hard I was extremely friendly and welcoming to his new girl. He went away then for the summer and they finished. I also finished with the guy I was seeing and went away for summer aswel.

So now we're both home and over xmas me and the ex have been getting on brilliant.. we have been having such a laugh and even had a xmas kiss a few nights.. he lead me onto believe that we might be able to sort things out.

We were all out and he was being his usual touchy feely self and flirting like mad and all of sudden the girl he was seeing turns up and it turns out he is back seeing her again. He was all over her in front of me and I was really upset. He actually slagged me in front of her.

Now tonight is one of my best friends bdays and shes having a huge party and the two of them will be there . And I just dont know how to feel.. I know its going to break my heart. Obviously I would never be mean to the girl but I really dont want to see them there in my friends house together !

I dont know what advice I am looking for I just dont know where to go from here. He completely played with my emotions and when I asked him about it he just said it come natural to him to flirt and look after me.

Thanks for reading altho I'm sure you are all bored to tears..

Toots

U poor thing OP, pretty much the exact same thing happened to my best friend when we were out one night. Her ex was all over his new girl like a bad rash and she was really upset, which is understandable as she thought they were going to get back together.

My advice to you is go and enjoy the party, if ur ex is being very 'affectionate' with the new girl, then move to a different room. I know it sounds thick but do your best not to let it get to you. Also, try to watch what you're drinking, cos if you get totally langers it may end up that you get into a row with your ex and say something you don't want to. (Saw this happen with my mate and it made things lots worse:rolleyes:)

Have a good time tonight, and hopefully ul find urself kissing some handsome stranger at midnight so that'll take ur mind off things:p

Einstein

Sorry to hear that OP. That's a bit of a sh!tty thing to happen. I'm a bloke and I can't even figure what he's thinking....
Toots hit the nail on the head tho, enjoy the party as best you can...hope it works out for you.

keep us posted

D

Leon11

He was just using you while his other half was away. Get over it not worth all the emotional hassle.

Wibbs

Who broke up with whom in the first place?

Cathmandooo

He was just making you jealous by being all over her, my ex did it to me and i even saw him look over at me while snogging some bird. It's fierce petty and pathetic. Take toots advice, dont drink too much tonight, enjoy yourself, be yourself and if he starts acting up just walk out of the room with your head held high. The last thing you want is to run out of the party crying or shouting at him. be the bigger person and take it on the chin. Hope you have a good night

spinandscribble

i agree with Cathooo. im guessing you broke up with him or he feels bitter. noone that wants a bit on the side would try to make you feel that uncomfortable.

go to the party. laugh and whispher to a mate if he looks at you while he's cuddling her. dont hook up with a randomer, your ex will imagine you're playing into his game. be friendly if the gf speaks to you, he wont know what to think. most importantly have fun.

WindSock

Avoid them like the plague at this party, and meet new people. Talk to as many nice guys as you can and try to have fun. Act as if they aren't even there. If your ex comes up to you, tell him plain and simple you don't want to be played and to not come near you again until he has made his mind up.

spinandscribble

made his mind up? she wouldnt seriously go back to him now?

wolf lover

I say just ignore them both when he talks to you give him the cold shoulder you never know he might miss you

dr_manhattan

I'm gonna jump to a conclusion here and say he's a ****ing pig, and you've been burned badly, so don't ever trust him again:

I'd qualify that by saying "it works for me" but actually I keep letting them back in and they keep stomping me. Same difference: it's the truth ;-)

maybe he's a lovely guy, but you know what? I've seen such poor behaviour from *both* sexes toward myself and others in the past three weeks that my new year resolution is "no more benefit of the doubt".

As for the party... start with 20%. Every other person at the party who is not you, your ex or his ex, adds 2% to your total. The result is your likelihood of having a great time and forgetting about them both. Watch the booze, and don't take anyone home just for the sake of it, and you should be fine. hell 20 people gives you a 60% chance...

Damn... new year's dumpings, mind games... lots of people have had some awful treatment this year.

What galls me is, the people dishing out the hard knocks all seem to love themselves, have no problem with it at all...

Christmas has been taken over by nasty, nasty people. It's like they wait all year for their chance to take a swipe at the vulnerable. Hell, it's like they spend all year positioning their prey to *be* vulnerable. Then armed with mistletoe and good cheer and plenty of booze... they strike.

I'm gonna become like an emotional Batman of christmas LOL: From next year onwards, those mistreating their loved ones are gonna wind up dumped outside city hall, badly beaten and with a big red batboot print in their arse... it's time we took back our city from these people.

davyjose

Divers wrote: »

Sorry to hear that OP. That's a bit of a sh!tty thing to happen. I'm a bloke and I can't even figure what he's thinking....
Toots hit the nail on the head tho, enjoy the party as best you can...hope it works out for you.

keep us posted

D

He's getting on with his life. Sorry OP if you thought he was misleading you, but if you look at it from his point of view, then you mislead him. You said you were willing to be friends, and well ... that's what you are. Sorry.