should price matter?

LegacyUser

I got engaged few days ago and yesterday went out with friends for a drink. Everything was ok until I was asked by friends gf to show her the ring. Her comment was 'he didn't put too much of effort in it, did he?'.
Me being sort of idealistic person didn't really care much about price of the ring. It wasn't very cheap and it wasn't very expensive but it was given as a sign that we want to be together because we love each other. And quite honestly if it was simple silver claddagh costing 30 euros I still wouldn't complain.

Is it the materialistic world we are living in or are people really looking on the price tags of engagement rings this days? Should it really matter?

Beruthiel

ladyofthering wrote: »

It wasn't very cheap and it wasn't very expensive but it was given as a sign that we want to be together because we love each other. And quite honestly if it was simple silver claddagh costing 30 euros I still wouldn't complain.

That is the only attitude to have imo.
What a horrible biatch to say that to you and good luck to the poor bloke who gets her, cos she sounds like a gold digger who is only interested on how much someone spends in order to show they care.
There are many things to worry about in this life, the price of ring is not one of them.

Congrats on your engagement

Lil' Smiler

Whatever ring you like is fine I think. It's not to do with how anyone else thinks!

I have a friend who always makes comments like that, she can't be happy for anyone. Jealousy!!!

Mr. Incognito

She sounds jealous tbh. You displays of Love shouldn't be about materiality. I have a ten euro limit with my girlfriend for christmas because presents that you're oblidged to get don't matter. I like spoiling her when she doesn't expect it.

aniascor

Some people are just like that. I remember when I got engaged, quite a few girls said to me "Do you mind me asking - how much did he spend?" I thought that question was completely out of line, so I just replied "Actually I do mind - I don't think that's relevant." They seemed a bit miffed, but that's their problem.

Your friend's girlfriend sounds horrible...

Evil Phil

Lil' Smiler wrote: »

Jealousy!!!

That's what I was going to say. She's jealous of what you both have. And congrats to you both

Dizzyblonde

You have the right values in my opinion, my engagement ring wasn't expensive because we were saving for a deposit on a house and it meant no less to me. Unfortunately these days in Ireland the size of the rock means everything to a growing number of young women. (I read only the other day that when a baby is born a very expensive piece of jewellery is also expected - push presents they're called!)
I think too many people are more focused on how a relationship is perceived to outsiders than on how strong it is within.
Congratulations on your engagement and I for one am glad to hear there are still people with a good sense of values.

The Sweeper

Hahahah I can just imagine. Begrudgers, eh?

I have a simple rose gold engagement ring that sits next to my white gold wedding band. They're not everybody's cup of tea, but I love them. My engagement ring has a round, quarter carat brilliant cut diamond. It sits bedded flush into the ring because I needed something bomb-proof because I'm too hands-on for a clasp setting.

It wasn't cheap, it wasn't expensive. I love it.

The last office I worked in full time had this short, fat, scottish bitch as the finance director. I took my rings off in the kitchen one day while rinsing a mug, and she came up and had a nosey at them and said to me "Oh, do you have TWO wedding rings?"

So I said "Oh sorry, is my engagement ring not registering on your big fat vulgar rock rating scale?"

We didn't talk much after that.

Amazotheamazing

It's a well known technique to make you feel bad about yourself, to rob you of the joy you should be feeling.

The girl in question has her own pathetic reasons for asking that question, don't let her issues become your issues.

January

To be honest I would have told her to fvck off. I recently got engaged and my engagement ring didn't cost that much, but it was the first one I tried on and it was a perfect fit, so I believe it's the right one.

Not one person has said "oh he didn't make much of an effort", thank god, cos I would have ripped them apart. She's just jealous and wishes she had what you have hun.

Congratulations on your engagement.

ntlbell

ladyofthering wrote: »

And quite honestly if it was simple silver claddagh costing 30 euros I still wouldn't complain.

Is it the materialistic world we are living in or are people really looking on the price tags of engagement rings this days? Should it really matter?

Then why didn't you buy a 30e claddagh? or a 1 euro ring? or something out of a Barney brack? why did you feel you had to spend an inbetweeny amount.

It's a bit like a woman complaining that people who spend 10k on a ring are stupid when her own was 5k.

Regardless of all the do gooders here on boards the majority of people in "Ireland inc." are materlistic, and people who whine and moan about spending too much money are generally just peeople who can't afford it.

Like the woman on my street moaning how xmas is all about the latest computer etc and not about Jesus when the truth is she's just annoyed she can't afford to buy her kids the same presents.

The girl maybe jealous or she may think the ring was a bit bland and looked like he put little or no thought it in it maybe was not very unique and she spoke her mind.

LegacyUser

Thank you

and thanks for all the answers - good to know the world is still the same with just few minor exceptions

LegacyUser

ntlbell wrote: »

Then why didn't you buy a 30e claddagh? or a 1 euro ring? or something out of a Barney brack? why did you feel you had to spend an inbetweeny amount.

I didn't choose the ring. My (then)bf bought it and offered it to me. I haven't seen it until he proposed.

Cathmandooo

my god, what a cow! Cheeky rip to come out with that! you definitely have the right attitude! Congrats to you and your OH

K_P

ntlbell wrote: »

Then why didn't you buy a 30e claddagh? or a 1 euro ring? or something out of a Barney brack? why did you feel you had to spend an inbetweeny amount.

It's a bit like a woman complaining that people who spend 10k on a ring are stupid when her own was 5k.

Regardless of all the do gooders here on boards the majority of people in "Ireland inc." are materlistic, and people who whine and moan about spending too much money are generally just peeople who can't afford it.

What a ridiculous thing to say! Of course people are materialistic. But it's possible to appreciate the more expensive ring and treasure it without turning into a mindless consumerist zombie.

No one should ever say something insulting about an engagement ring. "Speaking your mind" is often just another slightly more acceptable way of being a b*tch. It was jealousy, pure and simple and I'm sure anyone else who was there was pretty shocked at what she said. She's made herself look bad, and no one else.

Incidentally, based on this, don't be surprised if she tells you you look minging on your wedding day!

Overheal

just remember Homer proposed with an Onion Ring and look how good their marriage is!

Cathmandooo

ntlbell wrote: »

Then why didn't you buy a 30e claddagh? or a 1 euro ring? or something out of a Barney brack? why did you feel you had to spend an inbetweeny amount.

It's a bit like a woman complaining that people who spend 10k on a ring are stupid when her own was 5k.

Regardless of all the do gooders here on boards the majority of people in "Ireland inc." are materlistic, and people who whine and moan about spending too much money are generally just peeople who can't afford it.

Like the woman on my street moaning how xmas is all about the latest computer etc and not about Jesus when the truth is she's just annoyed she can't afford to buy her kids the same presents.

The girl maybe jealous or she may think the ring was a bit bland and looked like he put little or no thought it in it maybe was not very unique and she spoke her mind.

The majority of us are materialistic but it doesnt give us the right to be downright rude! That's what this girl was by 'speaking her mind'.

sunnyjim

Oh (wo)man, of course price doesn't matter.

I hope that you are only questioning the whole 'price' thing because your friend did. How could price matter anyway? I'm assuming that he's not Scrooge or anything!

I get the feeling that it really doesn't matter to you, and I hope I'm right.

Go enjoy being engaged!!

BoozyBabe

Well, from a discussion on another site, it does seem that lots of women want a rock & want it to cost the earth so they can show it off.

They seem to forget the real meaning of getting engaged.

My attitude is exactly like yours.

I would honestly be happy with a ring from Argos!!!!

& I wouldn't want my partner to spend more than €500 for a ring. In fact, I'd be happy with a lot less.
I think there are so many more useful & important things to spend money on.

A piece of string tied around my finger would say every bit as much as a €10k ring imho!

Congrats on the engagement

TomMc

Congrats OP,

Don't mind the silly cow - A lot of people out there only value themselves by what they own. They have no sense of self. They are usually stupid enough to think life's affectations will compensate for voids in their lives or that they can buy into dignity.:rolleyes:

There is a saying that the poorer you are the more you value your possessions, the lower your self image the more important they become.

Hopefully that auld handbag will be left on the shelf, where she belongs.

---

Anyway, Less is more !

Afterall, it's what it represents that counts, not what it costs.

LegacyUser

It is a materialistic world. I'm getting married next year and I'm so sick of listening to people that I'm buying my wedding band in argos

Solarball10

ladyofthering wrote: »

Everything was ok until I was asked by friends gf to show her the ring. Her comment was 'he didn't put too much of effort in it, did he?'.

Uggggggh!! What a complete cow - even if she thought that, I can't believe she said it to your face! I admit that I've thought that about a couple of my friends' engagement rings - but I would NEVER say it! You always coo over it and say it's lovely

muboop1

ladyofthering wrote: »

I got engaged few days ago and yesterday went out with friends for a drink. Everything was ok until I was asked by friends gf to show her the ring. Her comment was 'he didn't put too much of effort in it, did he?'.
Me being sort of idealistic person didn't really care much about price of the ring. It wasn't very cheap and it wasn't very expensive but it was given as a sign that we want to be together because we love each other. And quite honestly if it was simple silver claddagh costing 30 euros I still wouldn't complain.

Is it the materialistic world we are living in or are people really looking on the price tags of engagement rings this days? Should it really matter?

strikes me as complete gold digger... you op have the perfect attitude...

it is a sign of love, it dont matter the cost...

LegacyUser

Yeah apparently 15K is the minimum that should be spent on an engagement ring and it should be changed every few years...and you know who told me that? A girl from Donaghmede. Ironic or what.

whiskeyman

The only price that matters is the one your boyfriend put on you.... priceless! So much so, he wants to spent the rest of his life with you.
Many congratulations!

LegacyUser

Most girls just want to feel special and while they know their boyfriends love them, they want to be able to boast to their friends about the ring they got...and that's fair enough in my opinion...but you won't see me spending 15k on a wedding ring...

DundalkDuffman

I always had the notion that it was a months salary was appropriate for an engagement ring, couldn't agree more with the most of the posters. That girl was a right beeatch. It was a horrible comment to make.

seahorse

OP, first off congratulations on your upcoming marriage. Here's my engagement story in brief: I got engaged in late '99 and my ring was fairly expensive; it had three emerald cut diamonds that weighed over a carat all together. I loved the ring and the bloke who gave it to me, but his drinking got heavier and heavier until it got to the point where I knew marriage would have been madness and I had to walk away.

Don't let anyone else talk crap in your face about rings. You're far better off with what you have; a more modest ring and a fiancee who'll actually make it with you to the alter.

K_P

cheesedude wrote: »

Yeah apparently 15K is the minimum that should be spent on an engagement ring and it should be changed every few years...and you know who told me that? A girl from Donaghmede. Ironic or what.

15k??!! :eek:

Who the hell has that kind of money to be spending on an engagement ring? Especially a ring that will be on the scrapheap in a few years? This is all just an extension of some people's obsession with weddings these days, wanting a millionaire lifestyle for one day and to hell with the marriage.

OP, you have exactly the right attitude. I never mentioned it in my first post here, but of course congratulations on your engagement.

Oryx

OP congratulations. You and your Mr sound well suited.:)

Your friends gf is a little jealous and a lot tactless. Disregard that kind of silly comment and be happy.

ntlbell

Cathooo wrote: »

The majority of us are materialistic but it doesnt give us the right to be downright rude! That's what this girl was by 'speaking her mind'.

one person's rudeness is another one's honesty.

I don't believe in buying HUGE rocks, but I do believe the ring should mean something and if you're not going to put a lot of money into it you should put a lot of thought time and effort into it.

now if he just went in to any aul shop and bought what he could afford and gave no other thought then maybe that's what the ring looks like a run of the mill no thought given ring, and if it is the case and the girl is a good friend, her words seem like an honest assessment to me.

being rude will happen when she out does her at the wedding

Rb

OP: Should have just asked where her fiancee was. Obviously a stupid cow and definitely not a friend.

As far as I can tell there's not a huge amount of emphasis put on engagement rings, it's something I deal with quite regularly and the average price seems to be about €3k, with the wedding bands averaging about €500-€1200.

Out of all the people I've dealt with (which is a huge amount) about 5 people have had engagement rings worth €10k+, so I really wouldn't worry about it.

slade_x

ladyofthering wrote: »

Is it the materialistic world we are living in or are people really looking on the price tags of engagement rings this days? Should it really matter?

Of course it shouldnt on a purely materialistic level

Some people may think that if you are given a very expensive engagement ring that financial security wont be a problem for obvious reasons, which has ties to what are now old fashioned traditions of a kept woman. Me i think the pressure of getting expensive engagements rings, etc. has more than likely left people without financial security.

I'd rather put the money to better use, after all you eventually will be starting a family, if you have not done so already.

An engagement/ wedding ring is probably a social symbol of status now, i suppose the old fashioned way of looking at it is a promise. the very nature of jewelry is materialistic however

skelliser

cheesedude wrote: »

Yeah apparently 15K is the minimum that should be spent on an engagement ring and it should be changed every few years...and you know who told me that? A girl from Donaghmede. Ironic or what.

jesus.
traditionally the price of an engagement ring is equivalent to one month of the guys wages, whatever job he may have.

Evil Phil

ntlbell wrote: »

now if he just went in to any aul shop and bought what he could afford and gave no other thought then maybe that's what the ring looks like a run of the mill no thought given ring, and if it is the case and the girl is a good friend, her words seem like an honest assessment to me.

Oh come on, if it was the ring pull of a can of bavaria your good friends wouldn't say something like that. They might struggle to say something flattering but struggle they would and manage to say something nice. That girl was being a bitch.

sodrisc

Definitely jealousy! And a complete lack of class too....

blah

Overheal wrote: »

just remember Homer proposed with an Onion Ring and look how good their marriage is!

I'm going to do this! (And let her pick a nice real one)

axer

ladyofthering wrote: »

I got engaged few days ago and yesterday went out with friends for a drink. Everything was ok until I was asked by friends gf to show her the ring. Her comment was 'he didn't put too much of effort in it, did he?'.
Me being sort of idealistic person didn't really care much about price of the ring. It wasn't very cheap and it wasn't very expensive but it was given as a sign that we want to be together because we love each other. And quite honestly if it was simple silver claddagh costing 30 euros I still wouldn't complain.

Is it the materialistic world we are living in or are people really looking on the price tags of engagement rings this days? Should it really matter?

Congratulations on not wasting a fortune on a useless piece of stone that is only expenive because of the marketing put into it. I will do the same and spend only a small amount on the ring when it comes to that - I don't know why people don't just spend the small fortune on a massive holiday or something that will give ye memories or something practical instead. Your girlfriend is just showing herself up so forget about her.