Breakdown in front of doctor - Nearly suicidal and doctor forgets it- HELP

LegacyUser

Hi,
I have been suffering from really bad depression for the last few years. I only got help in August and finally went to a doctor. The reason I went is because I got to the stage that I would prefer to be dead. I think before that I was always in denial. I finally went to the doctor and nearly broke down in front of him explaining the way I was. I explained how I cannot concentrate when people are talking to me and hence cannot understand them…how difficult work can be etc, no social life etc. He diagnosed me with depression. I was happy when he prescribed me medication for this and have been on it now since August. I have visited the same doctor numerous times since to extend get prescriptions and to see if the medication is working well. I have to say it has definitely made a difference. I still don’t fell normal though.

I have been reading up on various other conditions for the last few days and have been thinking about my visits to my doctor. I was diagnosed with ADHD when I was younger and as I was reading up on it I learned that in many cases it continues in adulthood. I now realize this is what I have and maybe perhaps this triggered the depression as I get down that I’m not like other people and the way I act and say things without thinking and lots of other things.

The strange thing is now that thinking back by doctor never explored anything else with me (like bipolar disorder or ADHD). In fact I said to him that I had ADHD when I was younger the first time and he dismissed that saying that I have grown out of it. When I had my first appointment with the doctor I explained that I feel like dying. I remember then in the third appointment or something he said something to me like (you never really had suicidal thoughts or anything did you-you were never really that bad or something along those lines and I just said “well never really bad – meaning making a plan to commit suicide”). He had forgotten about what I said to him.

I am still on anti – depressants now which take the edge of depression so you can cope with life but I still have the ADHD. I don’t want to go back to the same doctor again. (no way). It was so difficult for me to initially go to that doctor(and nearly breaking down in front him was very tough). I really don’t want to go to a doctor like him again. Why the hell did he not explore other options with me? He did say in the initial appointment that I may need to see a physiatrist but never mentioned that again. I think the reason he never mentioned it again was because I made abit of an improvement starting off on medication. How will I find a right doctor?

Thanks for listening

t_ucd

Unfortunately there are people like that who should never have become doctors, I've been to see a few of them myself. The way I found a good doctor was through reccommendations by friends and family. Do your friends and family know you're seeing a doctor? That's the only suggestion I have for finding a better one, sorry I can't be of more help.

LegacyUser

Use google, or a phone book, or the yellow pages to find a different doctor.

I'm sitting here in a wheel chair, i haven't walked in 10 years and you're depressed because its hard to focus in work and you've no social life.

I understand you're not well but seriously, look how much worse off you could be.

I hope you find a good doctor.

tbh

with respect, all problems are relative. This is a physical condition, telling someone to cheer up is like someone asking you to walk. with respect.

katieboo

^^^ what that poster said. Mental illness is just as serious to the sufferer as a physical disability would be to another. OP i lost my brother to suicide nearly 12 months ago because he didn't look for any help. Why not not do a google search for some of the suicide prevention groups and ask them for a reccomendation for a doctor who has experience dealing in this area.

punchestown

Unless you have suffered with depression, I would leave your advice aside. As tbh said all problems are relative and to dismiss a condition which is the greatest killer of young people in our society shows a degree of ignorance which I would not expect from someone who also suffers a debilitating afflicition.

In relation to finding the right doctor, may I suggest you seek out the right counsellor. You can go and see any number of different ones, at cheaper rates than your doctor and they would be in more of a position to advise re the ADHD. Whatever you do, keep fighting your corner and dont go it alone. The help is out there, keep pressing and you will find the right one.

JuliusCaesar

Is the doctor you're attending a GP or a psychiatrist?

LegacyUser

Fair enough.

Good luck OP, hope you find the help you're looking for.

Victor

I wouldn't read as much into everything that has been said between you and the doctor. You say you "nearly broke down in front of him" but it may in fact have been relatively minor, we all get emotional at times and it is difficult to gauge things.*

What you can do is seek a second opinion and ask for a referral to a psychiatrist and / or a counsellor. Realise there may be some moments of pain, but they will pass, you will survive.



* I practically ran away after my niece's funeral, physically and socially.

Canis Lupus

dis.with.doctor wrote: »

I have been reading up on various other conditions for the last few days and have been thinking about my visits to my doctor. I was diagnosed with ADHD when I was younger and as I was reading up on it I learned that in many cases it continues in adulthood. I now realize this is what I have and maybe perhaps this triggered the depression as I get down that I’m not like other people and the way I act and say things without thinking and lots of other things.

Have you been reading doctoring for dummies? Or maybe physcology for beginners? Cos funnily enough you're better off not diagnosing yourself although it's good to be educated on subject matter nevertheless.

He had forgotten about what I said to him.

How tragic.

Last paragraph

Why are you asking us and not your doctor about what your options are?

Failing that run a google search for depression help in Ireland or for the cheapo cure get Sky and watch Paramount Comedy a few hours a day.

LadyJ

OP, with regard to the doctor forgetting about what you had told him,
I don't think doctors really listen to problems that carefully, they just tick the
boxes and diagnose, then they treat.

If you want someone to really listen to you then see a therapist. You can still
take medication but talk to a therapist too, it can help more than you realise.

Victor

Canis Lupus wrote: »

How tragic.

Harsh dude, harsh.

But in a way, very true. Doctor have perhaps several hundred patients. They can't remember everything.

pinkypinky

Try contacting Aware (www.aware.ie & 1890303302) who could possibly help you. They have support groups and may be able to get you a list of accredited clinical psychologists. Medication is great but you need to work out the underlying issues so you're not stuck on pills for ever. Good luck and don't give up.

*Page*

I know how hard it is to be lost and not knowing who to turn to. I'd just keep trying different doctors. It took me a very long time to find one who was right for me who understood what i meant.

But there is something at points in my life (usually when i was preocupied with greater things) I forgot the most important thing, my doctor isn't physic.

I have to remind my doctor each time what my last issues where, and some times where we left off...

I have only 1 doctor where he has many paitents.

Advice for going into talk about your feelings
~write it all down
~read what you wrote, this way its easier to keep composure~keep your notes for future refference.
~keep a diary


good luck in your search

chump

there are many doctors who are just bad doctors

try someone else

Semele

imagine being a doctor, seeing a new person every 15 or so minutes every day...and then being expected to remember every detail of that 15minutes a month later when you see the person again. Yes, its important to find a doctor that takes you seriously but do try to remember tht it is their job and they have no personal investment in your situation. Medical practice these days tends to be very patient-centred compared to a few generations ago when the doctor acted like he was God, in other words, the patient is given more control over directing the consultation and has responsiblity for bringing up matters that they want explored as opposed to being interrogated. If you want to ask about your ADHD then do- by not correcting him when he said you had prob grown out of it all you did was agree with him. He's not a mind reader, if you want an opinion on something, ask for it. Best of luck

LegacyUser

Semele wrote: »

imagine being a doctor, seeing a new person every 15 or so minutes every day...and then being expected to remember every detail of that 15minutes a month later when you see the person again. Yes, its important to find a doctor that takes you seriously but do try to remember tht it is their job and they have no personal investment in your situation. Medical practice these days tends to be very patient-centred compared to a few generations ago when the doctor acted like he was God, in other words, the patient is given more control over directing the consultation and has responsiblity for bringing up matters that they want explored as opposed to being interrogated. If you want to ask about your ADHD then do- by not correcting him when he said you had prob grown out of it all you did was agree with him. He's not a mind reader, if you want an opinion on something, ask for it. Best of luck

Heh, yeah your right actually. i was being a dumbass expecting him to read my mind.

b3t4

OP, a GP is not the crutch you are looking for right now. He has given you the medication for that. He has fulfilled is part of the bargain.

You need to get in contact with a therapist/counsellor (your GP will be able to recommend you one). It's their job to listen to you for an hour or so and get to the bottom of what's going on in your life. They will be able to give you the time you need right now to work things through in your head.

Best of luck,
A