How do i get over this girl?

Wasy

I am a 26 year old fella who up to last year had no interest in going out with anyone and was only interested in going out with the lads. There was one girl i fancied but i thought she'd never fancy me. Then amazingly last christmas she came on to me and we got together. I was over the moon and for a few weeks we got on great. Then coming up to her 21st i noticed a bit of a thaw in relations and a week before it we split up. I was gutted but gradually began to get over her when about a month later i met her and she wanted to get back together. I was after a few drinks and had a cut of her. I immediately regretted doing so and apologised but she did'nt seem to accept it. We talk since and i have gone on hoildays and weekend's away and have been with loads of other women but i can't get this girl out of my head. I live in a small country place and i see her most weekends and keep regretting how i let her slip. Has anyone any ideas on how to forget about this girl? I think if i just salute her and not enter in to a conversation it might help.

togster

well do you really want to forget her or do you want to get back together? Decide that first. If you want to get over her then you will.

Cathmandooo

Yeah if you want her back then try your hardest to get her back. Be romantic and try win her over. I'm sure she can understand that most of us say things when we've had a few drinks on us. You've apologised so there's no need to grovel anymore about it. Give it your all anyway if you want her back. If it doesnt work out then take your own advice and acknowledge her but avoid making conversation.

Saruman

Just treat her as a friend, since you can not avoid seeing her. To get over her, stop moping around and go find someone else. at the end of the day she is much younger than you... As a result she does not want to be tied down to any one person and wants to have fun.
Maybe in a few years when she matures things might be different, however do NOT wait for her... if it happens, fine.. but get on with your life.

I was in the same boat... a 20 year old, i was 24 and ready to settle... broke up.. first real love and all that.... im happily married now to someone i have known a LOT longer than i knew that girl.

Feelgood

Drugs or alcohol usually works with a few sorrowful tunes, try listening to Pearl jams Nothingman.....:)

Seriously though, if you really really really really regret it, I mean if its getting to the point where your lying in bed regretting it then go after her you fool. I've said this about 1.76 million times in other threads but life is way too short for regrets my man...

You need to act now, if you think she is the girl for you then bite the bullet and go after her and stop pricking about on internet threads. DO IT NOW...
Tell her you've been the biggest plank on the planet and do something to surprise her and win her back.

The fact that your even here asking how to get over her indicates that you don't really want to and want her back. Just talk with her, tell her you have been thinking about her non stop and you really want to work things out, but dont come across as a bit soppy git...

JCDUB

Wasy wrote: »

I was after a few drinks and had a cut of her.

Wtf does that mean??
You were with her or did you lose the head with her?

Wasy

I did tell her how i felt and she said she was'nt interested. I have kissed her since but that was only a drunken kiss. I have been with loads of other women and i thought i was totally over her but recently for some reason i have started thinking about her again and i feel akward when i see her out. I really need to get a grip.

JCDUB

Nah fook it man, tell her that you wanna give it a go.
At least if she says no or if you do try and it doesn't work out you can say "at least I told her" or "at least we gave it a try."

You could spend ages thinking "what if?" etc. etc.

Life's too short, get in touch with her.

Good luck.

Wasy

JCDUB wrote: »

Wtf does that mean??
You were with her or did you lose the head with her?

I was talking to her and i said a few nasty things.

aye

you sure you're not just thinking of her again cos it's christmas and you go together at christmas last year?

inverted_world

Wasy wrote: »

I did tell her how i felt and she said she was'nt interested. I have kissed her since but that was only a drunken kiss. I have been with loads of other women and i thought i was totally over her but recently for some reason i have started thinking about her again and i feel akward when i see her out. I really need to get a grip.

Unfortunatey, it's not as simple as being with loads of other people. You need to learn to feel happy and comfortable with yourself. I know it's cliché, the whole "loving yourself" notion but I'm speaking from experience here, going out, doing things for yourself, learning new things - taking up a new hobby maybe? Something that doesn't involve drinking, anyway. It makes a huge difference.

I know it's hard, especially if you can't avoid seeing her regularly, but at the end of the day, taking control of your life and happiness is vital, whether you are in a relationship with someone or not.

Wasy

aye wrote: »

you sure you're not just thinking of her again cos it's christmas and you go together at christmas last year?

You could be right, i suppose it being close to christmas does bring back memories, hopefully this time next month i will be feeling better.

cudman

Plenty of other posters will probably be pouncing on this now but my advice would be lots and lots of casual sex. Eventually you will meet someone to take your mind off her and you'll enjoy trying anyway;)
You and your mates organise weekends away from your home place every now and again. Hate to say it but any bird that tells a fella she has no interest in him then comes along and kisses him anyway is a prick tease. She more than likely knows the hold she has over you and enjoys it.