Problem please help

LegacyUser

Hello,

I have recently started going out with a fantastic girl, my problem is in the bed. When we sleep together sometimes its over if a few minutes and other times it might last longer thats without drink but with drink it lasts a long time. I just dont understand why i cum so fast during sex most the time.

We were just lying down beside each other the other night and i leaked it was like all slimy stuff over the top of it, She didnt know but I did I just dont know is this normal?

I love this girl and she loves me but sometimes im afraid of doing much foreplay in case I cant last long in bed. I dont want to lose her and she told me she doesnt mind but I do. I want to satisy her both in and out of bed.

I know a few things can be done like masturbating before but i did that the other night and still i only lasted a few minutes. I want to last longer and I was just wondering if anyone has any suggestions. Or is there a problem with me or is this normal?

Any information is aprreciated as im not very well educated in this.

thanks.

gamblitis

Pretty much a the same problem this other guy.Check out these solutions.

Hopethese help

And that "slimey stuff" is just precum, dont worry about that.Just shows your really turned on.

Marksie

When you say you are afraid of doing much foreplay is that her to you or you to her?
You appear to be totally focussed on penetration as the sole means of pleasuring.

Foreplay is a misnomer as it indiactes it comes before something. It doesn't it can be made to last for hours and can be equally as satisfying if not more so than penetrative sex.

So for a start you can work on satisfying your girlfriend that way. You can take it in turns if you wish, acting as giver and receiver respectively and what you do is only limited by your imagination, remember you have the five senses to work with and very tactile hands and a tongue.

So put aside thoughts of your ownn pleasure for a while, dont worry it will be returned, and simply concentrate on learning your lovers responses and every shape and curve of her body, and every erogenous zonee, not juts the genitals.

As for not lasting: well there are ways of overcoming this Strengthening the PC muscle is one way, leraning to relax and breath deeply is another (when you approach orgasm you tend to breath shallowly and quickly and tense the body).
Verying rhthym position and speed may helkp, thiough be aware you have juts hit the spot with her and she may not want you to stop as she is approaching a climax. but slow deep positions alternating with shallow can bbe very good. You dont need to make muhc movement and of course you can focus on all her other parts as well once your body moves to its own rhythm.


Anopther way is the stop start technique, You can practice this solo by bringing yourseelf to the point of no return and then clenching teh PC breathing and squeezing to stop yourself from tipping over.
With practice you will find that you will be able to do this while making love and it will both prolong and intensify your orgasms.
It is also possible for the two of you to do this tiogether where she works you manually and you tell her to stop and so on and so forth. it is very arousing to do this.
If she is of a wicked mind she can actually prolong it by fast then stop and the durantion between each will narrow to less that three fast strokes follwoed by a stop. You will then feel the control you have. If she is really in control she can do this til one on and one off. Then finish you. But watch out it tends to spray lol.

As for the slimy stuff? maybe precum poerhaps but if you notice it again go to your doctor

edit: one of my favourite postiions is crossing the T. though it known by quite a few names. Its ideal if you are hair trigger as ther isnt the tightness. Basically you lie side on your side forming the bars of the T. She opens her legs and flips them over your hips and her body forms the tail of the T. you then enter her. Your hands can then stroke her clitoris as you move or she can do it. If you do the stroking gently and hold the position while thrusting gently you can mantain it pretty much as long as you want. If you want a tioghet sensationat any time, slip onl of her legs between yours and pull her towards you while moving.

Its an excellent gentle resting position as there is no weight on her and you can juts rock and rotate

LegacyUser

thanks for all the information,

Marksie much appreciated there also.

I am considering going to my doctor if i precum much more as im not sure if that is normal.

How do i give her a orgasm and how do i know if she is about to climax? there the same thing right or is a orgasm more?

I really want to try stuff out with her and we talk about most stuff we'd like to do or try and shes always up for new experiences, but im just not that well educated in this and I want to try everything out with her especially giving her a orgasm.

thanks a lot.

Marksie

reg0005 wrote: »

How do i give her a orgasm and how do i know if she is about to climax? there the same thing right or is a orgasm more?

Oh my Op there is an essay there lol. Well lets assume its just a genital orgasm you are talking about rather than the other types so lets not confuse the issue. But you will know ash she will exhibit all sorts of physiologival cahnges as well as apparently "losing" it. It may not be what you see in porn films, they are faked anyways, but if you aer tuned to her body you will feel the movements and lsiten to the sounds she makes. It amy be simple mmms or yesses, or tensing or hips moving. For example of someones hips start moving against my nose when giving mouth magic. its is almost ceratinly a sign she is building. but thats because i knwo thhe persons resonses.
But who can tell you about her responses...she can... she can even show you by masturvating in front of you, then you will have a direct line to what turns her on.

reg0005 wrote: »

I really want to try stuff out with her and we talk about most stuff we'd like to do or try and shes always up for new experiences, but im just not that well educated in this and I want to try everything out with her especially giving her a orgasm.

You have your own answer there!!!!!!!!!!!!. open communication and a willingess to explore. We can only talk to you about it, its up to you two to get down and dirty and enjoy practicing...it IS whats it all about. So juts play and forget the penetration aspect.
Dont take it TOOO seriously, remember if it goes belly up at times dont get upset its all alearning curve whihc never stops. You may miss the mark a few times but evetually you will get the gold, then it will be how higher and further :-)

LegacyUser

thanks mark,

well last nite i did quite a bit of foreplay with her but yet again i precum before she even when down on me. but then after quite a bit of foreplay we made love and it lasted ages. But thats not my problem my problem is not lasting long unless she masterbates me just before sex.

I told her last nite I will go to the doctor over this as i dunno if its normal or not, she told me its not all that with her but I still want to satisfy her. thanks a lot for all the information it is working but this whole thing of precum is really starting for frustrate me.

thanks again

Talliesin

Okay. Firstly, forget about the precum thing. It's meant to happen, it neutralises the pH of the urethra as urine can raise or lower it too much for sperm and lubricates the penis and the movement of the foreskin.

Now. What happens if you have "foreplay", have intercourse, then have more "foreplay" (which of course isn't foreplay any more), maybe have some more intercourse, maybe not. Maybe chill out for a bit in each other's arms or sitting back a bit so you can enjoy the sight of each other's bodies and drink some water to replenish fluids, then have more "foreplay" and/or more intercourse?

Stabshauptmann

Unreg 00005 wrote: »

thanks mark,

well last nite i did quite a bit of foreplay with her but yet again i precum before she even when down on me. but then after quite a bit of foreplay we made love and it lasted ages.

if you go to the doctor he will laugh at you. Precum is natural/essential thing. You should not go to the doctor about it.

Secondly, your at the same stage most ppl are at starting out. Like anything else, practice will make perfect. Youve already discovered the two best tricks for lasting longer already (alcohol and a bj during foreplay). You can also try a thicker condom but Im going to go out on a limb and guess you're using durex extra safe already.

You are a normal, healthy person. Just relax and have fun.

aye

Kaptain Redeye wrote: »

if you go to the doctor he will laugh at you. Precum is natural/essential thing. You should not go to the doctor about it.

if he laughs at you, sue his ass.
go to the doctor if you feel you should, it will relax you about it and he will give you advise on it.

Stabshauptmann

aye wrote: »

if he laughs at you, sue his ass.
go to the doctor if you feel you should, it will relax you about it and he will give you advise on it.

This is bad advice. Its like going to the doctor to ask why is there hair starting to grow under my arms or why has my voice deepened. Why waste €50 for the doctor to tell him what he can find out from google or any sex ed book.

Unless Im misunderstanding the post due to terrible grammar and he is using precum and premature ejaculation as synonyms, which he shouldnt.
I realise the poster is concerned about the latter as well; though neither warrent a trip to the doctor

estebancambias

Am I the only one who thinks foreplay is disgusting?

Nerin

Am I the only one who thinks foreplay is disgusting?

yes?

estebancambias

Seriously? I would be suprised to be honest.

Esel

estebancambias wrote: »

Am I the only one who thinks foreplay is disgusting?

Probably not. Am I the only one who thinks you should be banned from here? Definitely not.

OP - relax. Things will settle down soon enough.