Trying to Read Her Mind

LegacyUser

Hi all,
Recently I moved into a house sharing with three girls and a guy. I'm there about a month.One of the girls in the house I fancied her from the start(call her "Sarah"). We do get on very well together but I presumed that she never fancied me.

However last week, a friend of mine came up to stay. the girls in the house were impressed by my friend, sure hes a good-looking man.anyway we went out a few nights. Now myself and my friend were together chatting most of the night and "Sarah" and the one of the other girls in the house who is her best friend were sticking together. halfway through the night she texted me saying someting along the lines of "you and your friend are spending too much time together xxxx". (I didnt have my phone with me so I didnt see the text till I gor home.) "Sarah" came up to me in the club asking did I get her text. I said no...What did it say...She said she had deleted it. Nothing happened that night.

So by the next morning I was thinking that maybe she does like me. Over the weekend, I never metioned the text to her.

On Monday we went out again, myself, her, her best friend and her best friends BF. From some of the things that happened during the night, I got the feeling that she definatly does like me. I had the chance to do something about it but basically.....I didnt have the balls. Yesterday then she was a bit stand-off ish and not very happy which is unlike her.

So tonight I have decided to definatly do something about it. I just have to know either wasy because this week its been wreaking my head.

It seems straight forward just to ask her but the problems arise because she gives off so many mixed signals. One day it would seem she is into me and then another time she would'nt. We happened to be talking about previous relationships in the house over the weekend She talked about a guy she met whom she hopes to see again or lads that she fancies.

So what Im looking for help on how do I approach it tonight?
I see three options:
1. Ask her myself straight-out. How would I do this? Should I mention the text?
2. Ask her best-friend first whom I know they share everything to get a clear story?
3.Wait?

Any advice is appreciated.

Dinxminx

She's a girl - of course she gives off mixed signals! Either ask her straight out in an "I like you, do you like me?" way (otherwise she might deny it thinking you don't feel the same) or wait and crank up the flirting. Good luck!!

Saruman

You could try asking her out and emphasise its just the two of you
Then again... who am i to give out advice.... I did not have a proper girlfriend till i was 24.

biko

It sounds to me like she is "throwing" herself at you and you are missing the signals. This pisses her off.

If I was was in your shoes I'd crank up the flirting to overload tonight like Minx said. Compliment her on her clothes and smell. Let her catch you looking at her. Touch her.

Say "It's so so nice being out with you" or words to that effect and give her a quick kiss on the lips.

star-pants

Same advice as has been given - -she was probably flirting with you (you were a little vague on the night out that you missed your chance so I can't tell) and you didn't respond the way she'd hoped.
So of course she's going to either try and make you jealous / think you don't like her that way and move on.

I suggest if you want to date her - do something quick before she does possibly get with some other guy.
If you have the chance tonight, flirt away - give compliments etc like Biko said - see how she responds, if you get the all clear -- go for it!!

best of luck x

LegacyUser

Thanks for the advice guys. I'll be honest. most of the women that i've been with usually come on to me first. She is just a very confusing girl on a night out. she'd be chatting to me sometimes and then she would be off, and I would'nt see for for a while. Ill flirt like a madman tonight anyway. I was actually thinking of taking her aside and saying something to her or does that sound like a bad idea?

star-pants

Hi LOST!
Flirting is a good idea -- some might advocate the pulling her aside and saying something - could go 50-50 -- I'm not sure perhaps others will have better experience/responses to that bit hun.
IF you're unsure of her intentions then perhaps do so - and if she declines, you can say you were getting odd signals or something... But just if she wasn't responsive to flirting - then perhaps saying something might make things awkward if she didn't like you that way.

But by the sounds of it -she may well like you -- so flirt like a madman and best of luck pet

Bosco84

You better do this fairly early on in the night, she could go off with someone else just to show you that she can (if she is reasonably good looking). Don't say I din't warn you. Have a few drinks in your place first and make sure she knows that you like her before the both of ye leave the house.

LegacyUser

Do the straightforward, logical thing. In this case, to avoid making things very awkward, when her best friend is suitably inebriated, just ask her if she knows, say you don't want to make things awkward between you 2 but on the other hand you want to know. Does she know? No matter what the answer is the situation remains positive, you keep your dignity and your present good relationships within the house if the answer is negative - if she says yes she does like you you can go from there. DO NOT confront the girl in question.

LOST! wrote: »

Hi all,
Recently I moved into a house sharing with three girls and a guy. I'm there about a month.One of the girls in the house I fancied her from the start(call her "Sarah"). We do get on very well together but I presumed that she never fancied me.

However last week, a friend of mine came up to stay. the girls in the house were impressed by my friend, sure hes a good-looking man.anyway we went out a few nights. Now myself and my friend were together chatting most of the night and "Sarah" and the one of the other girls in the house who is her best friend were sticking together. halfway through the night she texted me saying someting along the lines of "you and your friend are spending too much time together xxxx". (I didnt have my phone with me so I didnt see the text till I gor home.) "Sarah" came up to me in the club asking did I get her text. I said no...What did it say...She said she had deleted it. Nothing happened that night.

So by the next morning I was thinking that maybe she does like me. Over the weekend, I never metioned the text to her.

On Monday we went out again, myself, her, her best friend and her best friends BF. From some of the things that happened during the night, I got the feeling that she definatly does like me. I had the chance to do something about it but basically.....I didnt have the balls. Yesterday then she was a bit stand-off ish and not very happy which is unlike her.

So tonight I have decided to definatly do something about it. I just have to know either wasy because this week its been wreaking my head.

It seems straight forward just to ask her but the problems arise because she gives off so many mixed signals. One day it would seem she is into me and then another time she would'nt. We happened to be talking about previous relationships in the house over the weekend She talked about a guy she met whom she hopes to see again or lads that she fancies.

So what Im looking for help on how do I approach it tonight?
I see three options:
1. Ask her myself straight-out. How would I do this? Should I mention the text?
2. Ask her best-friend first whom I know they share everything to get a clear story?
3.Wait?

Any advice is appreciated.

-avey-

Id say she is a little shy herself, she has been giving you signals that she likes you but seems to be waiting for you to make the move.. i think you should be more flirty around her, as suggested but make sure the two of you want to start something up as it may make things awkward you two living together

TheJoker

Dinxminx wrote: »

She's a girl - of course she gives off mixed signals! Either ask her straight out in an "I like you, do you like me?" way (otherwise she might deny it thinking you don't feel the same) or wait and crank up the flirting. Good luck!!

Sorry but I would have to advise against this. If you do ask this way she may thing you are trying to do an impression of Borat, hence taking the pi$$. That's what poped into my head when I read it.

But you should just lay your cards on the table.

Dinxminx

Lol obviously not those exact words!!!

LegacyUser

Well Guys I didnt try the the Borat line last night, good suggestion though. We didnt go out....So I said nothing. I have to say something tonight I know. The women in the house are going off this weedend so I would like to give her an idea before she goes. I'm toying with the idea of saying something to her Best Friend (though it sounds like something you do when you are 12) which I know will get back to her. So even if we dont go out tonight, shes knows and next week is a new week. I worried though that I might have missed my chance.

biko

Perhaps a text now to say "Looking forward to seeing you tonight. Perhaps we could do something, just us two, next week?"
Then turn on the charm full throttle when you see her.

azezil

Maybe she just wanted to be with your friend....

LegacyUser

i agree with azezil, even though i don't like it.