night clubs without other halves

lauren_f

hi people
quick question for voting: is it ok for a guy to go out to a club and get pissed with his mates, without his girlfriend or even inviting her, and vice versa?!

spinandscribble

since when is having friends and getting drunk a decision made by a bf/gf? you need to have a life of your own.

mcR

Yeah of course it is. I think it's bad for couples to spend too much time together and I cant stand friends who cant go anywhere without their other halfs

If it's done in a sneeky way that's a different story!

dudara

Thinking about it personally, I suppose that I'd tell my other half, but then we do live together. I don't really remember what the etiquette is in the early stages of a relationship.

meglome

Wouldn't see the slightest issue with going out separately. It’s all about balance at the end of the day.

Fwaggle

lauren_f wrote: »

is it ok for a guy to go out to a club and get pissed with his mates, without his girlfriend or even inviting her, and vice versa?!

Yes

LegacyUser

If it was me I'd tell my bf, but I have no problem going out without him, sometimes I feel guilty leaving him home by himself, but I get over it once om out hehe! He does the same with me, usually lets me know he's going out, sometimes invites me depending on the night and the people he's going out with but not always. He's big boy who can look after himself! Doesn't need two mammies!!

mandcal

ye of course it is. me and my boyf have a nite out seperately once every month and it works well!

MagicMarker

lauren_f wrote: »

hi people
quick question for voting: is it ok for a guy to go out to a club and get pissed with his mates, without his girlfriend or even inviting her, and vice versa?!

How old are you?????

Fysh

Nope, not under any circumstances whatsoever. He is no longer an independent human being, he is your property and must request permission from you to do anything more complicated than going to the toilet :rolleyes:

Sarcasm aside:

Yes, of course it's normal. Moreover, it's healthy for him to do this and you should be doing the same, so as to stop yourself from getting bored with life. Nothing can make a relationship duller than when you do everything together and thus have nothing new or interesting to talk about. You haven't given up all aspects of your former life just because you've embarked in a relationship with this fella, and neither has he.

Frankly, if you think you should be a permanent part of his social life or that you should have the right to veto his nights out with his friends, then your relationship is going to hit trouble sooner rather than later, and were your fella any of my friends I'd have no hesitation in recommending breaking up.

randylonghorn

lauren_f wrote: »

hi people
quick question for voting: is it ok for a guy to go out to a club and get pissed with his mates, without his girlfriend or even inviting her, and vice versa?!

Lord yes ... tho' depending on what stage the relationship is at, at least letting him / her know where you are is probably courteous / a good idea.

/me wondering now whether you're pissed off at him for going out/ ... or whether he's pissed off at you for going out, and you're gathering back-up here ...?

keefg

Niteclubs are for singles only.

The only exception to this is is there is a gang of couples out for some ones birthday, otherwise, leave her at home. End of.

IrishMike

keefg wrote: »

Niteclubs are for singles only.

The only exception to this is is there is a gang of couples out for some ones birthday, otherwise, leave her at home. End of.

Very strange point of view there keefg.
My girlfriend often goes out with her friends to clubs, once every now and then i
go to clubs myself, dont see it as even an issue worth talking about to be
honest.
We are both adults who trust each other so where is the problem?
Becomes an issue when there is trust issues if you ask me

cinnamon

I think the problem lies in the title of this post

night clubs without other halves

Why do ppl use this term? I hate it. YOU are a full person, NOT half of another. While ppl don't use it literally I think they should get out of this mindset.

On topic - yes it is important to do things seperately, but does your boyfriend EVER ask you to go out with him?

How Strange

yes laurenf it is perfectly normal. Why wouldn't it be? Do you expect your bf to do everything with you and include you in every night out?

vorbis

perfectly normal.

My gf actually complained about me going out to meet some friends last night. I listened to it and calmly told her I spent a lot of time with her as well alongside bringing her out to meet my friends as well.

Still though, I can do without that needless bitching. You'd want to be careful OP, that kind of attitude can be very quick to annoy people.

Clare Bear

Of course your boyfriend should be able to go out with his mates to nightclubs without you. Don't be one of those girls who won't let their boyfriends go out without them, it won't do you any favours.

How Strange

lauren f also has a post on PI asking how do you know if your bf loves you as much as he says he does so I reckon the OP has a few trust issues she needs to work on

biko

lauren_f wrote: »

hi people
quick question for voting: is it ok for a guy to go out to a club and get pissed with his mates, without his girlfriend or even inviting her, and vice versa?!

yes

The Hill Billy

How Strange wrote: »

lauren f also has a post on PI asking how do you know if your bf loves you as much as he says he does so I reckon the OP has a few trust issues she needs to work on

Not to mention the "Anal Sex" thread too.

It looks like the OP has just entered the big bad world of relationships & someone is taking advantage of her.

lauren_f - If you're reading this - maybe have a chat with a mate or a responsible adult (an aunt maybe?) about what's going on in your life at the moment. They may be able to answer your questions & advise you better than anonymous people (no disrespect to other boardsies!) on an internet forum.

How Strange

lauren f has a new thread now asking about 22yr old sleeping in bed with boys... either she has had alot of activity in her life recently which she needs answers to or she is throwing out random questions for the sake of it.

Dudess

lauren_f wrote: »

hi people
quick question for voting: is it ok for a guy to go out to a club and get pissed with his mates, without his girlfriend or even inviting her, and vice versa?!

Eh... yes.

How Strange wrote:

lauren f has a new thread now asking about 22yr old sleeping in bed with boys

22??? One of her threads opened with "if a guy wants to have anal sex with a girl does that mean he might be gay".

Marksie

Lauren F: you Have 4 posts to your name. each one of ythose correspnds to simple "voting questions" in some cases and totals 4 Different threads.

What overall is your Personal issue. Rather than 4 threads and single questions could you prepare one thread

estar

lauren_f wrote: »

hi people
quick question for voting: is it ok for a guy to go out to a club and get pissed with his mates, without his girlfriend or even inviting her, and vice versa?!

on how it makes you feel. i ahve to say i do go out the very odd time
without my bf to a night club. but i always keep in touch with him
during the night. id hate him to feel worried. He does the same for me.
Hes just gone off for a long weekend with all his friends and i wouldnt
be worried as we keep in touch. but men need their space as do women.

if he was following me around the whole time or vice versa looking over
my shoulder and at every text i sent, that would be bad. I hve close
male friends I confide in, but i dont talk about personal details of the
relationship. i respect the relationship and do what i have to to maintain
it, he does the same.

I know what to do not to p*** him off, but at the same time if he
was throwing a fit because he wasnt invited to a club with my
girlfriends id be like - listen, get a life.

that said sometimes i do the odd spot check if we are both out,
like, oh im just calling down. silly, ive no reason to do it, its just
terrotorialness, and also i like chatting to him and his friends
they are all great craic.

Beruthiel

Not a PI