Kids who don't get affection from parents will have no morals?

saviourgirl

Was having an argument about this with my friend the other day after we witnessed a spoilled brat of a kid in the supermarket.

I said the reason for that is lack of affection....she disagrees.

What u thinks?

Pompey Magnus

Nah, its because parents are too afraid to discipline their kids for fear that someone will report them for child abuse would be more like it.

humbert

Kids that don't get a good clip around the ear when they behave like little brats grow up to have no morals.

Dave!

Maybe you should ask a child psychology who is familiar with research in the area!

Pherekydes

saviourgirl wrote:

Was having an argument about this with my friend the other day after we witnessed a spoilled brat of a kid in the supermarket.

I said the reason for that is lack of affection....she disagrees.

What u thinks?

Where the fcuk do morals come into that?

Would a kid (no age given) even know what morals are? Parents just indulge their kids too much. That's why they're spoilllllllled brats. Doesn't mean they'll grow up amoral, though.

PCros

Slow coach wrote:

Where the fcuk do morals come into that?

Would a kid (no age given) even know what morals are? Parents just indulge their kids too much. That's why they're spoilllllllled brats. Doesn't mean they'll grow up amoral, though.

I think the op meant they would have no morals later on in life.....

Shryke

Morals are relative. Society, culture and the people around the child will most likely determine whether he turns into a little prick or not.

biko

It's operational conditioning, within behavioural psychology.

The child learns that crying in the shop will get it sweets: crying = reward. One way to stop this behaviour is to buy sweets but the child has to wait to the car to eat them.
Of course there is always the option of ECT, electro convulsive treatment.

Nevyn

If a child does nto bond emotionally with thier parents and feel that thye are loved and want to continue to be loved they will not care about retaining the love and affection of the parents and there for will not care when they are punished.

Part of the parenting relationship is that the child will want to please the parent and not let them down or dissapoint them, if parents do not establish this relationship and firmly the fact that they are in charge then the child will rule the roost and not learn how to be have as they will disreguard thier parents intructions from picking up thier toys to throwing stones to smashing neighbours windows.

There are many children who are given desginer clothes, the lastest games for DS / PSP but who don't have the emotional bond needed with thier parents who are either too busy living thier lives or think that as long as they can meet all the material needs of the chilren with 'stuff' that they are doing thier job.

eoin5

If you have to hit them do it with a newspaper, that way theyll hate newspapers not people in the future

Terry

"Well you know, I became an alcoholic because my parents didn't love me enough. And then I became a junkie because my parents didn't love me enough. And I went into hypnosis and therapy and I found out that parents used to hit me."

Nevyn

Terry wrote:

"Well you know, I became an alcoholic because my parents didn't love me enough. And then I became a junkie because my parents didn't love me enough. And I went into hypnosis and therapy and I found out that parents used to hit me."

PFFF more like they can't be arsed making the effort not to be a junkie or an alcoholic as they don't know how to stick to something and their self esteem is so low the don't think they are worth making the effort.

AS children we can't help the impact our parents have on our lives, as adult we can choose how much our childhood and our parents have on our lives.

Terry

Thaedydal wrote:

PFFF more like they can't be arsed making the effort not to be a junkie or an alcoholic as they don't know how to stick to something and their self esteem is so low the don't think they are worth making the effort.

AS children we can't help the impact our parents have on our lives, as adult we can choose how much our childhood and our parents have on our lives.

That's part of a Denis Leary sketch from "No Cure For Cancer".

We did it all. We did whatever we could get our hands on back in the seventies. We did ****ing handfuls of mushrooms, pills, Ludes, coke. Whatever it was, we just ****ing swallowed it, ok? That's what we did! People go, "Well why didn't you go into rehab?" We didn't have rehab back in the seventies. Back in the seventies rehab meant you'd stop doing coke, but you kept smoking pot and drinking for a couple more weeks. You know? "Yeah, give me a case of Budweiser and an ounce. I gotta slow down! Jesus Christ! I'm outta control. Look at the size of my pants for Christ's sake!"

Because that's the big thing now. Rehab is the big ****ing secret now. Isn't it, huh? Yeah, you can do whatever you want. Just go into rehab and solve your problems. Isn't that the big celebrity thing? That's what I'm gonna do. Yeah, I'm gonna get famous. Then when my career starts to flag, I'm gonna go into three months ****ing bender. Ok? Coke, and ****ing pot, and smack, and ****ing booze, and drive over people, and beat up my kids, go into therapy, go into rehab, come outta rehab, be on the cover of people magazine, "Sorry! I ****ed up!" That's what they do, man. They go into rehab and they come out and they blame everybody except themselves. They blame their parents, right? That's the way. Everybody comes from a dysfunctional family all of the sudden, huh? Rosanne Barr comes from a dysfunctional family? Not Rosanne! She seems so normal to me! The Jacksons were dysfunctional!? Not the Jacksons! These people give each other new heads for Christmas for Christ's sake!

I am sick and tired of hearing that ****ing speech. You know? These people come out of rehab they always have the same story. "Well you know, I became an alcoholic because my parents didn't love me enough. And then I became a junkie because my parents didn't love me enough. And I went into hypnosis and therapy and I found out that parents used to hit me." Hey! My parents used to beat the living **** out of me! Ok? And looking back on it, I'm glad they did! And I'm looking forward to beating the **** out of my kids, aren't you? For no reason whatsoever. *thbbt* "What'd you hit me for?" "Shutup and get out there and mow the lawn for Christs sake!" There's therapy for ya! Mowing the lawn and crying at the same time. "The Leary kids in therapy again. Their lawn looks great, it's unbelieveable!"

God.. "I'm just not happy. I'm just not happy. I'm just not happy because my life didn't turn out the way I thought it would." Hey! Join the ****ing club, ok!? I thought I was going to be the starting center fielder for the Boston Red Socks. Life sucks, get a ****ing helmet, allright?! "I'm not happy. I'm not happy." Nobody's happy, ok!? Happiness comes in small doses folks. It's a cigarette, or a chocolate cookie, or a five second orgasm. That's it, ok! You cum, you eat the cookie, you smoke the butt, you go to sleep, you get up in the morning and go to ****ing work, ok!? That is it! End of ****ing list! "I'm just not happy." Shut the **** up, allright? That's the name of my new book, "Shut the **** Up, by Doctor Denis Leary. A revolutionary new form of therapy." I'm gonna have my patients come in. "Doctor, I.." "Shut the **** up, next!" "I don't feel so.." "Shut the **** up, next!" "He made me feel so much better about myself, you know? He just told me to shut the **** up and nobody had ever told me that before. I feel so much better now." Whining ****ing maggots.

And all these people quitting. I think it's a good thing, AA. And the recovery and rehab, because I've got some friends who'd be dead without those programs, but you know something. Now we've got a new problem. Because now they quit drinking and drugs, they're completely stressed out, and they decide to work out, which is fine. I'm not a workout guy, but I understood Nautilus. It made sense. There were arm machines and leg machines. But have you seen these people who are using the stair-master? Huh? Have we turned into gerbils ladies and gentlemen? People are paying money to go into a health club and walk up invisible steps over and over again for an hour and a half. "Where are you going?" "I'm going up! And I paid for it too! I can stay here as long as I want!" Folks, you wanna go up and down stairs, move into a fifth floor walk up on the lower east side. Ok? What's next? A ****ing chair master!? "I sit down. I get up. I sit down. I get up. I sit down. I get up." The door master. "I open the door. I close..." What the ****?

K-9

saviourgirl wrote:

Was having an argument about this with my friend the other day after we witnessed a spoilled brat of a kid in the supermarket.

I said the reason for that is lack of affection....she disagrees.

What u thinks?

It depends. Maybe after the spoiled brat behaviour the mother/father still showers affection on the child regardless of the behaviour. That is wrong to.

Black Swan

Parents have to be good role models (not decipline Nazis with their kids). You can't go out every weekend and get wasted, cheat on your spouse, call in sick at work when you're not, pocket the money when a retailer gives you too much change back, yell and swear at home to get your way, and not expect some of this immoral behaviour to rubb off on your kids?

Don't you just love the expression: "Don't do as I do! Do as I say!"

mc nuggets

I would think that too much affection would turn a child into a spoiled brat. But a child who is spoiled may learn morals from experiences outside of home