Can not get a girl friend....

JonnyC

First time poster here...

I am a single 26 year old male from Cork. The problem is that I am single. I have never had a "proper" girlfriend, been on a few dates here and there over the years that would be about it.

I have a good enough job, prob about a 6 out of 10 looks wise, athletic build.

My main problem is that I am really shy and find it hard to make conversation espically with females. I have plenty of friends for going out with and stuff and go out most weekends but still can not meet anyone.

Can anyone offer any advice? Any good place to meet women in Cork

Thanks?

Saibh

have you asked any of your friends for advice - maybe get them to help you out on chatting up a girl etc

grainne_t

A lot of girls quite like shy guys! You should try the Cube for meeting girls - there always seems to be more women than men there..when you are talking to a girl, just try to be yourself...you will probably come accross a lot beter than some drunken loud as***le:D

dudara

You should check out the Cork forum Region > South > Cork City.

The gang of regular posters there often head for beers and maybe you could join the next session. Social pub groups can be a great way to meet new people and help overcome shyness, as well as meeting new ladies.

I wouldn't really recommend nightclubs etc for meeting people as it just can be too hard to hear what they're saying.

Spyral

best chance are to ask your firends. that way the people come pre-vetted

genie_us

Might not sound too helpful, but the minute you stop looking is when you'll find a really great girlfriend.
That's how I met my boyfriend, it seemed to come from nowhere!

I hope you find someone

SarahSassy

Shy is attractive too!!!! Dont be too hard on yourself. Try to forget that your are talking to a 'girl' and just think of it as chatting to another person... You dont need to think about scoring each time you chat to someone. Talk to them and find out about them before thinking of them as a 'potential';

highlydebased

jergam wrote:

Might not sound too helpful, but the minute you stop looking is when you'll find a really great girlfriend.

+1

Agreed. Happened me recently.

Be yourself......someone will come along someday

CliffHuxtabel

OP, know how you feel. Id consider myself shy as well and it used to rack my nerves trying to talk to women on a night out.

My best advice is just practice. When youre going out just summon your balls and start approaching more girls. Its the buddhist approach to learning: dont worry about the consequences i.e. getting rejected/ scoring. Just observe how you get on and youll get better and your confidence will grow.

You dont have to try any lines on her or try to project a different image of yourself. Just keep the conversation on her and shell give you the benefit of the doubt. Women love attention.

If youre a 6/10 as far as looks are concerned then youre bound to have a few nice girls give you the eye on a given night. If you just try to interact with a few more girls and not fear rejection (some rejection is inevitable, sadly) then you increase your chances dramatically. Good luck.

Sorry for sounding like Swiss Toni!

finbarrk

There is a book called 'the game' written by Neill Strauss I think, it was reviewed on the radio last year and its supposed to be a great help for people in your situation. You might get it on Amazon.

Pompey Magnus

grainne_t wrote:

A lot of girls quite like shy guys! You should try the Cube for meeting girls - there always seems to be more women than men there..when you are talking to a girl, just try to be yourself...you will probably come accross a lot beter than some drunken loud as***le:D

I second the Qube. I recently moved down to Cork and knew not a soul. I quickly discovered the Qube and it proved to be a handy place for meeting the ladies. Don't know too much about anywhere else in Cork though. Not so sure if a nightclub is the place for finding a girlfriend but its a start.

GrumPy

jergam wrote:

Might not sound too helpful, but the minute you stop looking is when you'll find a really great girlfriend.
That's how I met my boyfriend, it seemed to come from nowhere!

I hope you find someone

+2

Nuttzz

jergam wrote:

Might not sound too helpful, but the minute you stop looking is when you'll find a really great girlfriend.
That's how I met my boyfriend, it seemed to come from nowhere!

I hope you find someone

ironically enough i'd given up looking after a barren spell and bang....I think people can smell the desperation

DaMadSprogabeen

finbarrk wrote:

There is a book called 'the game' written by Neill Strauss I think, it was reviewed on the radio last year and its supposed to be a great help for people in your situation. You might get it on Amazon.

I read this book. It is a well worth reading. In terms of helping you get more women I dont know. I think you have to be a certain type of person to follow all the stuff in the book.All a bit false. however it is great at banging home the need to love yourself and to constantly self improve.