Money Mad

LegacyUser

I have a serious problem in that im money mad. i hate my job but wont leave it because im paid so well. The job makes my life hell but the satisfaction when i get paid is great, its like some sort of drug for me.

Then when i get paid i dont spend a cent more than i have to. Ill often skip lunch to save myself a few quid! I have loads of money in the bank and nothing to spend it o but still i live like this!

I know i cant take it with me, but why do i continue to live like this?

Carrigart Exile

unclemiser wrote:

I have a serious problem in that im money mad. i hate my job but wont leave it because im paid so well. The job makes my life hell but the satisfaction when i get paid is great, its like some sort of drug for me.

Then when i get paid i dont spend a cent more than i have to. Ill often skip lunch to save myself a few quid! I have loads of money in the bank and nothing to spend it o but still i live like this!

I know i cant take it with me, but why do i continue to live like this?

There's nothing wrong with building a nest egg although missing lunch to save an extra couple of Euro sounds almost compulsive behaviour. Don't be the architect of your own misery and loneliness, read what happened to Scrooge before he saw the lights

LegacyUser

'This happened to me, i even stopped going out to save money, i was saving most of what i earned, then one day i just decided to spend the lot.
Now im learning to enjoy myself again.'

pepper

unclemiser wrote:

I have a serious problem in that im money mad. i hate my job but wont leave it because im paid so well. The job makes my life hell but the satisfaction when i get paid is great, its like some sort of drug for me.

Then when i get paid i dont spend a cent more than i have to. Ill often skip lunch to save myself a few quid! I have loads of money in the bank and nothing to spend it o but still i live like this!

I know i cant take it with me, but why do i continue to live like this?

i have the exact opposite problem money burns a hole in my pocket i have to spend it- it annoyes me if i dont.

Oh the positive side you will never have debt problems if you can save like that

But then again you may miss out on a night out or friends wedding etc just to save money that u dont need to save

I personally think you should set urself a goal that once a week u buy something you wouldnt normally(Like u said lunch) or even a can of coke- start slowly and work your way up

DublinWriter

unclemiser wrote:

I know i cant take it with me, but why do i continue to live like this?

It could be a 'hangover' from the way you observed your parent's attitude to money when you were young.

Coileach dearg

unclemiser wrote:

I have a serious problem in that im money mad. i hate my job but wont leave it because im paid so well. The job makes my life hell but the satisfaction when i get paid is great, its like some sort of drug for me.

Then when i get paid i dont spend a cent more than i have to. Ill often skip lunch to save myself a few quid! I have loads of money in the bank and nothing to spend it o but still i live like this!

I know i cant take it with me, but why do i continue to live like this?

Are you from Cavan?

Fajitas!

Tbh OP, budgeting is what you need. Set up two bank accounts, one for saving, one for casual spending. Put the majority of your wages into the saving, and some into the other...

This way, you know you're still saving, but have money if you do need to get lunch, go for a pint etc...

Dukephil

It's good that you have recognised that this could become an issue. Has this gone to the stage where relationships are being affected? Do you pay for your round when you go out? Or do you try to hide this attittude to spending from your friends by buying more than your fair share and then agonise later?

LegacyUser

Was glad to read your post, because I can be exactly the same way, and I dont know why.....

I dont have a house or kids or anything - I do rent and have bills to pay, but the rest of my money I obsess about saving.

I wouldnt go so far as to not eat lunch (If I NEED it i.e food, shelter, warmth) then Ill pay for it. What I do do is bring in my lunch. Costs me about €1 a day.

But my salary is minimum wage, so maybe this is why I am so obsessed with saving (I have only saved roughly €4000 in the last year).

I love going out and all that. What happens me is that I wont spend money on anything during the week (maybe petrol and 1 pack of fags). I "trick" myself into thinking I am saving money and then at the weekend I go out and blow €70-€80 - sometimes I feel a bit crazy....

Talliesin

If you skip lunch you are making yourself less healthy and also doing without a break in the job that you don't like (even if you leave the office for an hour, a break with a meal is a bigger break than one without as it helps change your thought patterns from those you need in work).

Have it as an absolute rule that you don't skip lunch (or breakfast).

Beyond that, pick some goals - anything - and do them. Your job will be easier to put up with if you've something of value to you elsewhere in your life, and you have the money to have a bit of freedom in what you do in this regard.

I wonder if possibly your niggardliness is a way of justifying your continuing in your job to yourself - the only benefit you see is the money, so you'd better damn well have a lot of money or else you'll have to confront how uphappy you are in your job?

LegacyUser

I actually think this may be more about security and control than anything else. Could it be that having money in the bank makes you feel more secure, so you don't have to worry about unexpected bills, being unable to work for an extended period or loosing your job suddenly etc.

Some people need a cushion that's there to reassure them, especially if they're they type who get worried and stressed about these things. To some degree then it might be a good thing, but not if you let these habits take over your life

LegacyUser

That is exactly it. I need the cushion and the reassurance that the money is there. I love knowing that I have more money saved up than most people my age.

I wouldn’t try and get out of my round, if somebody got me something or I owed it I’d definetly pay it back, but I would never buy anyone a pint out of the good of my heart, not in a million years would I do that.

If I want to buy something I’ll go to a million shops just to ensure I can’t get the item for a euro cheaper. Then I’ll be delighted knowing I saved myself a euro!

I have a well paying job (even though I despise it so much and don’t think I can take it anymore), cheap rent, a car paid for by my job and don’t really spend much on clothes etc. I may go out once every couple of weekends, but even then I’d ensure I could do a night out on under 45euro and if I spent more than that it would wreck my head for the next few days as all my 1euro savings here and there have gone to waste!

SO that’s the situation, I find myself getting seriously stressed, annoyed and frustrated by it all. I know I have to relax a little but the more money I get the more I want more and get worse and worse.

I have to change, no 2 ways about it, money is controlling my life.

Marksie

I am pretty good at money management, but usually there is a goal for it at the end. I was brought up with a "dont be in debt" ethos but did reqalise eventually that you have to live as well.

I dont think that being careful or saving money is the issue here. Its what are you saving it for?

as you said the money is controlling your life it should be the other way around really.

It is all about the work life balance in the end. Yes its nice to be comfortable and have savings. No-one likes paying over the odds (though we all know it happens in dublin) and it is nice to shop around and get bargains.
But it can go too far and this is whats happened in your case OP. The reason for saving money has got lost in the fact you are saving money.

Now i am not going to suggest you splurge all of a sudden, it is probably gainst your nature. But do occasionally treat yourself, when the voice says no iots too expensive, just occasionally say F*ck it all and get it anyways. It will help to juts lift you from the mindset you are in.

Talliesin

unclemiser wrote:

If I want to buy something I’ll go to a million shops just to ensure I can’t get the item for a euro cheaper. Then I’ll be delighted knowing I saved myself a euro!

It can be worth thinking about the time spent on this.

If it takes you just a quarter of an hour to save that one euro, then you're working at less than minimum wage.

Do you want to be working at less than minimum wage?

If you are enjoying a bargain-hunt, then that's different, you've spent some of your time on something and gotten enjoyment from it.

Extend this. Think about how much you get paid per hour. That is what your company thinks an hour of your time is worth. All the money you have, you have because you have convinced someone that your time is worth that.

Now, think of the time that you have to yourself. Imagine it being worth the same amount of money, but that it's going to be spent no matter how you use up each of those hours.

Are you getting your money's worth? Could spending a bit more - say having a good meal rather than something that just keeps you going as one example, mean you get a better bargain over-all?

Rb

Blow the lot on coke and hookers.

LegacyUser

you are lucky to be able to work i am also obsessed with momney and cannot work due to illness, always looking at cars in front of me and see if theie reg is newer than mine, want a newer one and when I get it wil want newer still

Could put a link to what Freud said about money but think that is not allowed? Mods please confirm, thanks