Help Clearing My Head Before Sleep

LegacyUser

I'm going through a pretty emotional time at the moment - I'm trying to make a big change in my life and it will be a few weeks before I know whether I get what I want or not (I'd rather not go into the details of what it is on here) but as a result of all this turmoil I am having difficulty sleeping.

I lie in bed going over and over things in my head (things which are out of my control). When I do get to sleep it's not very restful and when I wake my head is immediately filled with these thoughts again.

I am wondering has anyone else experienced anything like this and if so do they have any advice about the best way to go about clearing my head and relaxing before going to sleep? I've tried several methods but to no avail.

Marksie

NonStopThoughts wrote:

thoughts again.

I am wondering has anyone else experienced anything like this and if so do they have any advice about the best way to go about clearing my head and relaxing before going to sleep? I've tried several methods but to no avail.

OP what methods have you tried?

I use both meditational techniques (conscious breathing) to calm the mind and yoga relaxation techniques to untense the body.

biko

You can try wearing yourself out. Go for a run or similar/ a quick shower and then straight to bed.

Sometimes white noise/rain/classical music can help in the sense that is causes you to focus on it rather than on the thoughts.

I'd also suggest meditation of the focusing on breathing kind.

Talliesin

Meditation, but that's sort of a circular answer since meditation is just clearing your thoughts. Still, if you focus on breathing in a steady rhythm (in for a count of four, hold for two, out for four, hold for two, and so on), then briefly tense your feet's muscles before letting them relax and work your way up from there so that all of your muscles are in a more relaxed state then that's a start. Ideally you should aim to clear your thoughts entirely, but don't work too hard on it - let thoughts come and go and if any remain obstinately then go back to focusing on your breathing.

Physical exertion can also help - if you do any sort of physical work-out then doing that shortly before retiring could help.

SassyGirl_1

You could try writing them down - pen and paper or on a PC (depending on your typing speed/skills)

I find that when I have a problem or issue that is plaguing me, my mind can become consumed with "What Ifs" - "What if I did this/that - What if this happens or does not happen as a result" - trying to work out all the angles and issues, the possible outcomes. All of it just noise that will not stop.

Writing it down somehow makes it stop. Makes it permanent and final.

seamus

Talliesin wrote:

Meditation, but that's sort of a circular answer since meditation is just clearing your thoughts. Still, if you focus on breathing in a steady rhythm (in for a count of four, hold for two, out for four, hold for two, and so on), then briefly tense your feet's muscles before letting them relax and work your way up from there so that all of your muscles are in a more relaxed state then that's a start. Ideally you should aim to clear your thoughts entirely, but don't work too hard on it - let thoughts come and go and if any remain obstinately then go back to focusing on your breathing.

I have found this works well in the past. It doesn't always necessarily "clear your head", but it definitely makes you more relaxed and sleepy.

Physical exertion can also help - if you do any sort of physical work-out then doing that shortly before retiring could help.

I think this depends a lot from person to person. I've found that physical exertion will focus/clear my mind, but usually leaves me wide awake.

Capt'n Midnight

biko wrote:

You can try wearing yourself out. Go for a run or similar/ a quick shower and then straight to bed.

don't, even going for a walk shortly before will wake you up.

for me no caffine in the afternoon/evening

don't read or get your brain excited before going to bed , relax

getting honestly tired over a few hours might be better maybe go swimming earlier in the evening

ali.c

Yeah I tend to get that when i am stressed out over something. Some things that work for me are
1. turning of the tv and the computer at least an hour before bed
2. Reading in bed, but only something that is not particularly capivating or i have read recently
3. As other people have said some breathing excercises etc, or just plain counting, so every time you find your attentions wander just come back to the count or the breath.

However as you know there is nothing you can do about it, you could try just acknowledging that everytime the what if's come up and then let the thought go.

Revelation Joe

NonStopThoughts wrote:

I lie in bed going over and over things in my head (things which are out of my control). When I do get to sleep it's not very restful and when I wake my head is immediately filled with these thoughts again.

I am wondering has anyone else experienced anything like this and if so do they have any advice about the best way to go about clearing my head and relaxing before going to sleep? I've tried several methods but to no avail.

Write these things down before you go to bed. That way, your brain lets go of them. It kinda says to itself: 'OK, I can't do anything about these now, so I'm not going to worry about them until the morning'.
I find this especially useful with work problems.

Crumble Froo

SassyGirl_1 wrote:

You could try writing them down - pen and paper or on a PC (depending on your typing speed/skills)

I find that when I have a problem or issue that is plaguing me, my mind can become consumed with "What Ifs" - "What if I did this/that - What if this happens or does not happen as a result" - trying to work out all the angles and issues, the possible outcomes. All of it just noise that will not stop.

Writing it down somehow makes it stop. Makes it permanent and final.

i remember sayin to my counsellor of a few years ago that i couldnt sleep at night at all, and he suggested writing stuff down. was dubious initially, and i still remember the first words of my first entry was 'ok, so im supposed to be writing down waht im thinking. what the hell am i thinking? i wonder why i dont know what im thinking..."...

2 A4 pages later i had a lot of inner shít out, and was sleeping like a baby

ive recommended it to a few friends since, and only heard good things about it.

one thing id say is to try not do it on a laptop or whatever, as the temptation to feck around online, or just the glare from the screen doenst help with a sleepy mood. cuddling yourself into bed, opening a copy/notepad, and just writing, having a definitive stream for your thoughts to flow through really helps me anyway.

Giblet

Gets some Brian Eno and a pair of headphones.

Fanny Cradock

Giblet wrote:

Gets some Brian Eno and a pair of headphones.

Music for Airports!

You should try some Valerian root tea (I'm having a cupa 'Dr. Stuart's' brand right now - I guess any health shop should sell it). Sadly, it smells like poo, but happily, it does the trick for me.

If you can't get asleep, and you find yourself becoming frustrated with the sheer physical effort of trying, get up and do something to relax your mind for 5 or 10 minutes.

hupyago

NonStopThoughts wrote:

I'm going through a pretty emotional time at the moment - I'm trying to make a big change in my life and it will be a few weeks before I know whether I get what I want or not (I'd rather not go into the details of what it is on here) but as a result of all this turmoil I am having difficulty sleeping.

I would suggest talking about whatever it is to someone

NextSteps

Chamomile tea or hot milk and a biscuit, plus a very boring book (try a fridge manual or similar) will get your eyelids drooping.

Caliden

It's really strange but I just think about a single colour (i.e. blue, red, etc.) and within 5 minutes I'm asleep for the night. I went through a pretty tough break up a few months ago and couldnt sleep at night but this seemed to help me. Helped also during my final year exams.

my name is

few drops of valarium root (spelling) in a glass of water before bed, will help relax you and clear your head.

You'll pick it up in some supermarkets or chemists.

LegacyUser

Thanks for all the replies. I really appreciate it. Tried writing things out last night and I think it helped me. Got to sleep with less effort after doing it.

Hopefully once this whole situation is resolved (for better or worse) I will be back to my normal sleepy self every night.

CathyMoran

I would agree with the writing things down route of getting sleep. I remember when I was having my surgery and could not sleep, I wrote everything down and managed to get some sleep, if it works for that then it can work for anything.

b3t4

Things I've used in the past and still use at times.

1. Writing stuff down.
2. Sudoko, (the hard ones, I find that if I tire my brain out then it nods off)
3. Only allowing myself to think of the colour black and pushing other thoughts out of my head.
4. Telling myself (out loud) that there isn't anything I can do about what I'm worrying about now so there isn't any point to it.
5. Very rarely I'll just tell my brain out loud to 'shut the hell up' (yes this is an odd one
6. Try to learn something new (the concentration needed puts me right off)
7. Make myself stay awake. I've always found that the more I want to go to sleep the less likely it is that I will. Reverse pyscology for sleeping
8. Force myself into a routine that meant I had to wake up early.

For a situation like yours I'd say writing things down would be your best bet.

Good luck with it.
A

boardinwork

Reading all this is making me tired!

Yeah i actually have had this problem all the last week and it was doing my head in coz id be in bits in work. Then spoke with a guy yesterday and he said to breath deep and slowly and it will improve my life! He is a bit of a genius lecturer type and i tried it last night. 4 or 5 seconds in then 3 or 4 out. He said if you get into that habit of breathing you will always stay that bit calmer and it isnt difficult to keep doing it. He even put down Harrington Vs Garcia in the Golf recently to Harringtons breathing. You could see he was calmer because he took long deep breaths. The commentators even noted it. I know anyway, this is my new little thing to try out, maybe work out maybe not

Sangre

Loads of exercise during the day. Then just before or while in bed fire off a few knuckle children.

projectmayhem

NonStopThoughts wrote:

I am wondering has anyone else experienced anything like this and if so do they have any advice about the best way to go about clearing my head and relaxing before going to sleep? I've tried several methods but to no avail.

i've had this a lot of times. it always happens when big things are coming up, or generally when things are on your mind. my solution is to listen to my mp3 player (music and/or podcasts). i tend to nod off while listening, and wake up the next morning remembering nothing of what i heard, but with an empty battery.

always works for me