Donations to Charity

EricM

A minister, a priest, and a rabbi are discussing what they do with donations.

The minister says that he draws a circle on the floor and throws the money up in the air.
Whatever lands in the circle, he gives to God, and whatever lands outside the circle, he keeps for himself.

The priest does something very similar.
He draws a circle and throws the money into the air, but whatever lands outside the circle, he gives to God, and whatever lands inside, he keeps for himself.

The rabbi has a slightly different method.
He doesn't draw a circle, he just throws all the money into the air.
Whatever God wants, he keeps.

radioactiveman

mods is this acceptable?

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

why wouldn't it be?

Cake Fiend

radioactiveman wrote:

mods is this acceptable?

You're right, it's not funny enough. This joke needs more elephants.

radioactiveman

not trying to be picky, it just gives the message that the rabbi would keep all the money for himself which struck me as a bit of a stereotype

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

*shrug*

I seem to recall some child molestation catholic jokes, it's all fair game

Zapp Brannigan

Jews like money!? *shockhorror*
There's only stereotypicism (is that a word) if you look for it.

I thought it was a good one.

The Bollox

well now Radioactiveman does have a point. there are no good priest and Rabbi jokes. but I don't hear him coming up with any good ones!

and yes yes that was stolen from Peter Griffin

Hagar

It's just a joke, I'll throw it up in the air and if God strikes anyone down we know he was annoyed.

Guy:Incognito

radioactiveman wrote:

not trying to be picky, it just gives the message that the rabbi would keep all the money for himself which struck me as a bit of a stereotype

If the kippah fits......

galwayrush

Hagar wrote:

It's just a joke, I'll throw it up in the air and if God strikes anyone down we know he was annoyed.

LMFAO..Top Answer.:D

WindSock

radioactiveman wrote:

not trying to be picky, it just gives the message that the rabbi would keep all the money for himself which struck me as a bit of a stereotype

You're absolutley right. Lets ban all jokes that imply any sort of stereotype.







tumbleweed bounces by....

NeVeR

it's a great joke... come-on

ShowUsYourXbox

I remember hearing this joke in primary school, 15 years ago!

Caliden

That was in the movie short circuit so so so many years ago.
Still funny

Lola123

radioactiveman wrote:

not trying to be picky, it just gives the message that the rabbi would keep all the money for himself which struck me as a bit of a stereotype

This is the "humour" forum!!!!

h57xiucj2z946q

radioactiveman wrote:

not trying to be picky, it just gives the message that the rabbi would keep all the money for himself which struck me as a bit of a stereotype

lol


why do jews have big noses?
air is free

why do they have big feet?
*stamp* its my euro

how do you know your at a jewish dinner table?
fork in the sugar bowl

how do you know your at a jewish house at christmas?
parking meter on the roof

Gran Hermano

I thought it was kosher

patmac

Sarah Grumpy Yarn wrote:

lol


how do you know your at a jewish house at christmas?
parking meter on the roof

lol
jewish boy says to Dad 'can I have 50cent?' Dad says '40cent? what do you want 20cent for?'

Why has a 50p coin got corners on it?
To get it out of a Jews hand with a spanner.

Lighten up Radioactiveman, you sound like the guy in the Simpsons whose sells your comic.

Loomis

Zapp Brannigan wrote:

Jews like money!? *shockhorror*
There's only stereotypicism (is that a word) if you look for it.

I thought it was a good one.

lol ye there is, they call it stereotyping

dubtom

A very old one. Joe meets a sad looking jewish guy in a bar and says to him, why the long face, whats up. Jewish man says, ayyaya,3 weeks ago my aunt died, left me €10000, god bless her soul, two weeks ago I won the lotto,€15000, thank god thank god,last week my mother died and left me her house,half a million euro,god rest her.So why the long face, asks Joe. This week,said the jewish man,fuxk all.

Terry

patmac wrote:

lol
jewish boy says to Dad 'can I have 50cent?' Dad says '40cent? what do you want 20cent for?'

Why has a 50p coin got corners on it?
To get it out of a Jews hand with a spanner.

Lighten up Radioactiveman, you sound like the guy in the Simpsons whose sells your comic.

He has a point.
Worst. Joke. Ever.

To continue the trend:

Saddam Hussein called President Bush and said, "George, I had a wonderful dream last night. I could see America, the whole country, and on each house I saw a banner."

"What did it say on the banners?" Mr. Bush asked.

Saddam replied, "LONG LIVE SADDAM HUSSEIN."

Mr. Bush responded, "You know, Saddam, I am really happy you called. Last night I had a similar dream. I could see all of Baghdad, and it was more beautiful than ever. It had been rebuilt completely, and on each house flew an enormous banner."

"What did the banners say?" Saddam asked.

"I don't know," replied Mr. Bush, "I can't read Hebrew."

WindSock

Sarah Grumpy Yarn wrote:

how do you know your at a jewish house at christmas?
parking meter on the roof

Why would Santa visit a Jew?




Sorry, thats it. No punchline, just a question

WindSock

patmac wrote:

lol
jewish boy says to Dad 'can I have 50cent?' Dad says '40cent? what do you want 20cent for?'

I can't stop laughing at that

drunk_monk

Q: What's a Jewish dilemma?
A: Free ham.

Q: Why do Jewish wives use gold diaphragms?
A: Their husbands like coming into money.

Q: What do you get if you cross a Jew with a Gypsy?
A: A chain of empty retail stores.

Q: How did they know that Jesus was Jewish?
A: Because he lived at home until he was thirty, he went into his father's business, his mother thought he was God, and he thought his mother was a virgin

Q: What's the definition of Jewish foreplay?
A: Two hours of begging.

endplate

The first time I heard the OP's joke was at the end of Mass being told by the Parish Priest to the congragation

Gingervitis

drunk_monk wrote:

Q: What's a Jewish dilemma?
A: Free ham.

Sure he could just sell the ham on:)