Extremely nervous driver

Nightwish

So at the old age of 24 I decided to finally buy a car. I am on the final 6 months of my 2nd provisional at the moment. My driving history is scant and intermittent. I first learned when I was 17, and I used to drive my then boyfriends car around some private forest land they owned. I loved it, until one day right in the middle of my Leaving Cert, I crashed the car into a pillar. I caused a fair bit of damage to the car, and since then I've been really nervous. I got lessons when I was 20 and again, I was very nervous, and used to throw up before the lessons. I chickened out of a few lessons too. My instructor was a wonderfully patient man, but in the end I was used to the duel control car. He had to use his brake on more than one occasion! After my 6th lesson, he died suddenly, and I've never driven since. Now I've a car sitting outside, which, in short, I am petrified of. Has anyone got advice for overcoming this? Has anyone else been in this situation?

BobTheBeat

Sounds like lady luck hasnt been smiling your way! Seriously, you have just been unfortunate in your past experiences. That coupled with perhaps an overly accomodating instructor, has made things difficult for you.

Probably that hardest part for you now, is to just get used to the car. Go out and sit in it, get used to the gearing, and find a comfortable driving position. Start it up, maybe drive it up and down the driveway (if you have one). Maybe try and find someone who has a calming effect on you, and bring them along with you.

About two years ago, I was involved in a serious accident and bore witness to another in which one of the drivers was killed. There was only three months between the 2, talk about bad luck!It gave a serious knock to my driving confidence (I had been driving for four years previous). I can honestly say I was terrified of my car. It scared the sh1t out of me, just to sit in it. And I like cars, so this was alien to me. After some fairly lengthy therapy (which I dont think you'll need hopefully!), I managed to overcome my fears. I think the key is to just learn to be comfortable and to realise that you are in control constantly. And thats the crux of it,.. the control. If you wanted to, you can pull over and turn off the engine, maybe even get out and walk around and catch your breath. There should be nobody putting you under serious pressure or judging your driving - unless its an instructor.

But dont allow it to just sit outside and be a reminder of your fear. Seize the day! (and the keys):o The very best of luck to you.

smdweb

If you are learning , getting a good professional instructor is vital. I though I was able to drive, but the amound of bad habits I picked up over the years was amazing.
Only when I wanted to polish up for my test did I realise I actually had many poor elements to my driving.
Much improved now !

Accidents can happen to anyone, event the best drivers - so don't be put off

Best of luck with the driving.

princess-lala

hey, i crashed my car 6months ago after being on the roads for two years!! was never nrevous and now im unreal!!!! i did alot of damage to myself and the car!!
get somebody to drive the car to a supermarket late at night and then you drive it around there. you will never get over this unless you get into the car and drive!!
bring somebody with you at all times
good luck with it:D

missmatty

I was the same (still am a bit) so I can really sympathise. I guess just take it in baby steps. I have a car now just got it but haven't brought it up to where i live in Dublin just yet. I guess ask around for a good instructor in your area. Mine was great, he had the patience of a saint.

Nightwish

Thanks for all your replies. I don't feel like such a freak now. My boyfriend only started driving last year and he took to it with unbelievable ease. I plan on doing a bit of driving around the town late at night when there is very littel traffic, but I'm still unsure about lessons. There are so many shíte instructors out there I dont know who to go to.

Lindaloo

nightwash, I found my instructor through irishmotoring.ie where there are a lot of reviews for shools from clients

I wouldn't say I'm flying about the place but I'm out on the road when I thought I'd never be and I'm getting more and more confident the more I'm driving!

You'd a horrible run of luck and I wish you all the best.

TwoShedsJackson

Nightwish, try these guys http://www.schoolofmotoring.ie/parkschoolofmotoring/Main/Home.htm and book lessons with Paul. He has the patience of a saint and is probably the calmest person I have ever met, let alone a driving instructor.

He taught me and my wife to drive in six months, both of us being quite nervous at the start, and we both passed our test at the first attempt too, thanks to him.

Nightwish

I am in Kilkenny, which limits the availability of instructors. I know from asking around there are a lot of awful ones out there. I'll try the Irish Motoring site and see if there are any Kilkenny instructors on it. Thanks.

goz83

Nightwish wrote:

So at the old age of 24 I decided to finally buy a car. I am on the final 6 months of my 2nd provisional at the moment. My driving history is scant and intermittent. I first learned when I was 17, and I used to drive my then boyfriends car around some private forest land they owned. I loved it, until one day right in the middle of my Leaving Cert, I crashed the car into a pillar. I caused a fair bit of damage to the car, and since then I've been really nervous. I got lessons when I was 20 and again, I was very nervous, and used to throw up before the lessons. I chickened out of a few lessons too. My instructor was a wonderfully patient man, but in the end I was used to the duel control car. He had to use his brake on more than one occasion! After my 6th lesson, he died suddenly, and I've never driven since. Now I've a car sitting outside, which, in short, I am petrified of. Has anyone got advice for overcoming this? Has anyone else been in this situation?

I don't think an instructor would be helpful for your first couple of times back in the car because they usually make people nervous even if they are good drivers.

Not to be cliche here but the longer you leave it, the harder it will become. I've had 4 minor accidents in my 4 years of driving a car. The last one was only a couple of months ago and it was in a company car.Cosmetic damage was covering the whole passenger side and it was almost a write off as a result. I was forced into hedges on a narrow and dangerous road by trucks coming the other way. The trick is to get back to driving as soon as possible and not to let fear set in.

Since this is already the case with you I would recommend a visit to a hypnotist. If you google Irish Hypnotists Association" you will come across recognised and properly certified hypnotist. It is a very unregulated industry and almost anyone can call themselves a hypnotist (even if they have never attended a class). The IHA is a body which regulates the teaching and practicing of recognised and IHA approved hypnotists. This will help you overcome your fear of driving via positive reinforcement. Just be open to it and it will help.

wyk

Try a little Jameson or Stella before your drive, it will loosen you up plenty. But, then again, this Texan IS from America - home of the drunk driver.

But seriously, ya just need some more experience. I drive a 13 ton truck like I was born to do so. I've been driving since I was 12, and licensed straight for over 20 years with about a 1/2 a million miles or more under my belt. After a while, it's like breathing.

Wes