Is he interested or not?

LegacyUser · 03-08-2007 4:42pm #1

Story so far.... Met a guy thorugh friends (we are both late 30's), he called me and we had a couple of long conversations and then we went on a blind date. Got on very well, even though I didnt know how much I was into him but did know I liked him a lot.

He then invited me to a wedding. We had a ball and got on great. I met his friends and family and spent 2 great days together. The following day he asked me 'WIll you come to x (where he lives)'? and I thought he said 'when will you come to x?' so I said I dont know... He looked upset but I didnt cop the mistake and we went our separate ways. He called later that evening and we were in contact the next couple of days by text.

I called him last week and told him he should join me and a friend out on Saturday last. He joined us on the night out and we got on famously... We spent 8 hours on our own chatting, shopping and having a few drinks.... We stayed at my friends house (all innocent) and spent the day on Sunday having lunch and reading the papers - all very relaxed and I really enjoyed it. My friend thought we looked like an old married couple cos we were so comfortable... He then called on Sunday night and told me he had a great time.

And you ask whats the problem - the problem is that I have heard nothing since. He said he would call during the week and didnt..... Did I read all the signs wrong??? I did feel relatively confident that he was interested but obviously not.....

Oryx · 03-08-2007 5:32pm

Phone him, phone him, phone him.

Why put yourself through an agony of uncertainty when talking to him will tell you where you stand?:)

Poco Loco · 03-08-2007 7:55pm

Hmmm...how about text him? Just a feeler one like 'how was your week' or something? If he isn't interested and you call him then it could be an awfully awkward call.

TheDriver · 03-08-2007 9:34pm

By God your not 16, phone him and see what the story is.

BrandonBlock · 03-08-2007 9:42pm

Post a message on his bebo- be sure to write "bmb" (bebo me back) though so then the ball is in his court to contact you. Or else just txt him.

zipy · 03-08-2007 9:57pm

BRANDONBLOCK surely you dont think people in their thirties bother communicating via bebo, I as one like to think I have evolved a little further than that.

Esel · 03-08-2007 10:49pm

BrandonBlock wrote:

Post a message on his bebo- be sure to write "bmb" (bebo me back) though so then the ball is in his court to contact you. Or else just txt him.

[Zimmerframe]Bebo, you say? bmb? Harrumph! Send him a telegram. Stop.[/Zimmerframe]

OP, use the far-speaking thingie.

Chinafoot · 03-08-2007 11:14pm

Maybe he's waiting for you to contact him. Pick up the phone and call him ffs.

LegacyUser · 04-08-2007 12:56am

I wish it were easy for me to pick up the phone and ask him... I am shy in that regard and would end up taking 90 to the dozen and making an eejit of myself and not asking what I wanted to know....

I sent him a text... He replied and questions about me, what Im doing for the weekend etc, that someone was asking for me ..... There was some chit chat on text but no mention of meeting again...

I guess thats it... Shame!

Marksie · 04-08-2007 10:48am

WhatdoIknow? wrote:

what Im doing for the weekend etc, !

there was an opening.

WhatdoIknow? wrote:

There was some chit chat on text but no mention of meeting again

Did you ask whether he was free and may want to meet ? or leave it to him?

WhatdoIknow? wrote:

I guess thats it... Shame

Nonsense. C'mon its you who are letting it go. You are in your late thirties not teen.
Phone him, or send send a text asking of he wants to go out to dinner or the cinema, whatever.

Oryx · 04-08-2007 11:13am

Fortune favours the brave! As I said, phone him. So what if you talk 19 to the dozen? Maybe he likes that about you?

You sound like youd rather let him go than face your fear of calling him. I feel like giving you a metaphorical push* to go do this.:D

*I was gonna say kick up the ass.:p

LegacyUser · 04-08-2007 11:26am

I see where you are coming from but I suggested we meet last weekend, which we did. We dont live close to each other so it involves an overnight stay when we do meet....

Beelzebub · 04-08-2007 11:28am

Don't give up!!!
Ring him! Or maybe call to see him! If it was me I'd love if a girl did that!:)

Chinafoot · 04-08-2007 1:03pm

Maybe after your little slip-up he is just wondering if you're really interested and is leaving it up to you. Not exactly the most mature way to be carrying on but in fairness you both seem to be going on like teenagers.

If you are too shy to call him then send him a text asking if he'd liek to meet up again. Simple really. All he can do is say no.

LegacyUser · 07-08-2007 6:01pm

'I have been reading a neighbouring thread about the same thing and have decided just to leave it....

There is no longer any confisuion over that issue.... We talked about it and cleared it up.

He spent 2 days with me. Flirted, teased, talked, listened, called me that night and texted me to say he had a great time and would call that week and nothing..... He replied to my text, told me a friend of his from the wedding was asking for me etc but didnt exactly give me the option to ask too many questions....

He is a friend of a friend, we know a lot of people in common so why didnt he have the balls to just say 'adios' - I would have a lot more time for him.'

MissThing · 08-08-2007 1:11pm

Faint heart never won fair lady (or man) for this matter. It seems that you want him to take the lead, make the trip, issue the invite, chase you down..and you wonder why you're still single, get a grip.

DaMadSprogabeen · 08-08-2007 1:16pm

holy jaysus....you seem to have met someone you get on really well with and are willing to knock it on the head for the most spurious reasons....get of your hole and ring him....jesus:rolleyes:

NovemberStar · 08-08-2007 1:30pm

Hi there,

Im going to have to disagree totally. I dont think you should ring him. If he is interest HE will make the effort.

In my experience men don`t generally like to be chased. It can scare them off. Sorry guys but its true.

It souns to me like you made yourself seem too available. This can be a huge mistake. Pull back a little and see what happens.

NovemberStar

NovemberStar · 08-08-2007 1:31pm

Sorry for the spelling mistakes--I was eating a pot noodle while typing!

K-9 · 08-08-2007 2:22pm

NovemberStar wrote:

Hi there,

Im going to have to disagree totally. I dont think you should ring him. If he is interest HE will make the effort.

In my experience men don`t generally like to be chased. It can scare them off. Sorry guys but its true.

It souns to me like you made yourself seem too available. This can be a huge mistake. Pull back a little and see what happens.

NovemberStar

Well he did ask her to a wedding as well. I wouldn't do that, too serious on a 2nd date, so sounds like he was/maybe is in to her. He did in some of the texts as well ask what she was doing for the weekend.

We don't like been chased but we don't mind a girl sending an odd text either.

ollyk1 · 08-08-2007 2:38pm

Did nobody make a physical move at any stage??

It sounds to me like ye got on well but maybe he's getting mixed signals on the physical front having spent quite a bit of time with you and it's still all fairly innocent. He might be pulling back rather than risk looking foolish. Just a suggestion to think about.

I'd give him a call and suggest a meeting and give it one more go and if you are physically attracted to him let him know.

LegacyUser · 08-08-2007 2:51pm

'Ah yeah there was snogging etc but I meant that we didnt have sex...... There was a spark (at least on my part:S )

I dont at all expect him to do all the wrok.... I suggested he come along the last night out and then texted him last week.....

Just think its bad form on his part at this stage... He said he would call and didnt..... Thats over a week and a half ago now.. Pride is damaged but more so im annoyed my gut got it wrong with him.... He had always called when he said he would and I started to relax and trust him rather than keep my guard up.'

LegacyUser · 09-08-2007 2:27pm

'Oh FFS. He lives in the same city of some relations of mine and would be quite good at one particular sport.... Just found out my uncle went up to him out of the blue and introduced himself as my uncle.... Would this spook you guys??? He probably thought I had a wedding dress picked out.... jaysus...........'

aye · 09-08-2007 3:12pm

I find it bad that he said he'd call and didnt, i dont agree with that really.
he may have a genuine reason for not calling tho.

As a bloke, i wouldnt be freaked by the uncle thing.
I wouldnt be freaked if you called and asked to go out. and i like the girl to do some chasing.
sorry but not all guys are willing to do all the leg work, and why should they!

text messages are just a bad idea. you need to talk to him.
phone him, ask him if he wants to meet up again.
least you'll know one way or the other.

Is he interested or not?

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