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i just want to kill her

  • 28-07-2007 8:08am
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Im met my (now ex)bf a year ago- he moved up to Dublin from limerick, he had lived with his dad in limerick but after too many arguments he moved up to Dublin to be with his mother.Im 21 and he is 20

    After we got together we had the "Ex" chat and he said hes had a lot of girls but only one he loved and that was Kim, She was a year older than him they were together 2 and a half years and at one stage he considered proposing to her- He said even though she annoyed the hell outta him sometimes he loved her to bits and she was the only one who stuck by him even when they broke up they were best friends.

    When he moved he cut contact with her- he told me the reason he did this was she got engaged to a man and that he was insanely jealous, and he told her he still loved her and she dismissed it. I feel it was a bit horrible of him to do this after he called her "His rock" but its his choice.

    Anyway we broke up cos he said he was still mad about her and didnt want a relationship when he liked someone else.This annoyed me but nothing i could do about it.

    I was in the city last week and i saw him talking to a girl in a cafe. They seemed very flirty and ill admit i got a pang of jealously.

    I met him later and mentioned it to him and he said it was Kim. He said she had come up to Dub for the day and they had coffee-He said her fiance cheated on her and she was single. They had just randomly bumped into each other in town. His next works stung me like a knife........

    He said "It was so good seeing her-shes as beautiful as ever, God im still madly in love with her"

    I havnt stopped crying since then! ITS NOT FAIR! I NEVER HAD A CHANCE WITH HIM BECAUSE HE PUT HER ON A PEDISTOL AND NEVER TOOK HER DOWN!!!!!!!

    i just want to kill her


Comments

  • #2
    kittenkiller
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,433 ✭✭✭kittenkiller


    At least he was honest about it and didn't lead you on once he knew how he felt.

    There's nothing you can do except move on and try to forget about him.

    It's not her fault he feels that way about her.

    Give yourself and everyone involved a break and forget about it.
    The best way to get over one man is to get under another!
    You're 21, not getting any younger, life's too short to waste letting yourself be love-sick over someone.


  • #3
    Duckjob
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,859 ✭✭✭Duckjob


    Thats a hard situation for you, but for your own sake you should chalk it down to experience and move on.

    He needs to get over his ex before he can have a successful relationship with anyone else. You could waste the best years of your life waiting for this, and it might never happen.


  • #4
    PeakOutput
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,639 ✭✭✭PeakOutput


    obviously you like him but do you not think its now a case of you wanting wat you cant have?


  • #5
    milkerman
    Closed Accounts Posts: 460 ✭✭milkerman


    Kittenkiller has put it very plainly.
    The guy tried to move on after the rebuff from an earlier girlfriend, for whatever reason-he couldn't. He was honest with you. Sometimes honesty really hurts but is definitely the best quality to find in anyone.
    Move on girl, light a fire in some other fellah.
    For what its worth, your ex may well be setting himself up for serious heart break as this other girl dumped him before, she could meet someone else and do exactly the same again.


  • #6
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Bottom Line: He doesn't like you enough physically or as a person to see as his girlfriend.

    That's the truth. So find someone who does...there are plenty out there....


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  • #7
    dudara
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 33,518 ✭✭✭✭dudara


    Don't be angry at her - she really has nothing to with with all this.

    In fact, there's no point in being angry with your ex either. He just didn't move on before he met you. Lots of people make that mistake.

    Put it down to bad luck and experience, and concentrate on moving on yourself. Don't hold a grudge.


  • #8
    Sleepy
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 24,366 ✭✭✭✭Sleepy


    The guy thought he was ready for another relationship and was wrong. He made a mistake, was honest about it and did right by you in telling you so. He could have been a little more tactful but at least he didn't string you along like many guys would. Would you have prefered him to accidently call out her name some night?

    Face it, you don't want to kill her. You want someone (not even necessarily your ex) to feel the same for you as your ex does for her. You're simply jealous of her.

    Honesty's always the best policy. It can hurt at times but at least you know there's no point wasting time on this guy when he's still mooning over her so you can get on with your life and find someone new.


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