should i break up with short term girlfriend

LegacyUser

i am going out with my girlfriend for 5 weeks only(she's 21 and i'm 23)we have everything in common, and i mean everything in common, even to the point that when she came back to my gaff we had exactly the same stuff in our fridges and in our food storage(press), it was all going rosey up until last week, i treated her like a real princess and she loved me for it(her last boyfriend treated her like sheet for 3 years, and she broke up woth him 3 montyhs ago), we just 'clicked' and i went along with it cos it 'felt right' ya know?, we said it to each other many times that we are made for each other and how strange that we met and fell for each other straight away(never happened), well anyways bout 10 days agoish she started to be distant towards me to the point that she would not like me to hold her if we were watching a movie etc.(just sit beside her) and would make the odd comment when we'd chat ,'one was i was too affectionate towards her at times', this after 4 weeks of pulling my arms around her avery time we were sitting together,


we both live in galway anyways and she had to go to dublin for a week to see her mum sister, firends etc. so i gave her some space, i said i'd let her contact me if she wanted to(we both hoped the week would clear her head), i get a call off her on sunday night when she was 2 days in dublin and she was so stoned that i couldn't talk to her for long cos she seemed distant so i said to myself grand i'll give her a shout the next day, (yesterday) rang her twice yesterday with it ringing out, so tried her once today as was slightly worried but thought she may have lost her phone, she would normally call back from a mates phone fairly staright away, so rang her from work a couple of hours ago and still no answer(she doesn't know my work phone no.)

she calls me in work an hour ago not realising who i was saying.... 'ohh...hey!', i then replied to her 'how are things i tried calling ya yesterday did ya get any missed calls', which she replied, 'ohh ya' could get back to ya had no credit!, and the i said 'excuse me',which she replied 'well in fairness'

now this sems very strange to me as she had credit to call me in work and is lying should i drop ties, i think i should as she is lying to me saying she had no credit and then started to think of more lies(you can tell when someone is trying to look for something going 'mmmmmmmmm')

i fell like she is showing her true colours which is a petulant child

lads and ladettes advise??

Gingerspice99

Just ask her out straight what the prob is

It is strange though seeing as you were getting on great an all

But really I would just say things seem to have turned abit sour what the story

Good Luck

Fanny Cradock

It is possible that you are not made for each other. I wouldn't base a relationships worthiness on the condiments contained in your respective fridges.

There are really a whole host of possibilities: maybe you are coming on too strong; maybe she isn't over her ex; maybe it's her; and maybe it's you.

If you do decide to talk to her don't lay it on too thick. In as nonchalant a manner as you can muster, just ask her what the story is.

spinandscribble

shes probably just overcome with the attention shes not used to and sees it as too much. tbh thought she doesnt seem to care what shes making you feel by ignoring you and not being straight with you.
best thing to do is wait for her to come to you. dont make contact. when she does ask her what is going on with her and tell her to be honest. dont lay it on thick. she might fear your about to say "i love you" or something and shes freaked you by this whole made for eachother stuff.

just because shes used to be treated like sheet doesnt mean she has a right to treat you similarly. dont let that cloud your judgement. she should welcome you with open arms.
but sometimes women/men who stay with their OHs for long term while being treated like crap scream of simply loving the drama.

Sony

Hi skywalker,just read about your problem there and thought you might like to hear my 2 cents.

Listen first of all you need to be honest with yourself and consider the possibility that ... she may not be interested in you anymore. If this is the case then theres nothing you can do but forget about the girl-its happened us all mate.

But dont think about that yet, stay positive here because you need to remember that this is the only way you will have any chance of getting this girl no matter how she feels. You've made a mistake already in my eyes by confronting her about not returning your calls - this is a BIG turn off ,it comes across as desperate and controlling. However, You CAN redeem yourself in this respect by making sure you dont act like this with her again.

What you then need to do is give the girl space, make sure she knows that you have a life of your own and try just trrrryyyy to play it cool. Dont keep calling, texting or asking her out - This is a surprisingly hard thing to do but believe me its for the best and if it means you getting this girl - well its worth a try is'nt it;)

spinandscribble

just occured to me...
could it be possible she was planning to ring you later when she had more time?

maybe shes not the affectionate type? sorry im tossing and turning on this one.

LegacyUser

'it wouldn't le me log in as unregistered84 for some reason?
so here is the new me


thanks lads, my head is wrecked, she was to give me a ring when she got out of the cinema but didn't bother her hole for some reason, i feel like i am dealing with a child now, i won't be contacting her at all to be honest, i feel like throwing the stuff she has left over here in to a bag and popping it in to where her flatmate works adn saying 'this belongs to so and so', is that rash?'

smileysurfer

''thanks lads, my head is wrecked, she was to give me a ring when she got out of the cinema but didn't bother her hole for some reason, i feel like i am dealing with a child now, i won't be contacting her at all to be honest, i feel like throwing the stuff she has left over here in to a bag and popping it in to where her flatmate works adn saying 'this belongs to so and so', is that rash?'[/QUOTE]
''


im not sure if you should jump straight in and end it now as ye seem to have been getting on really well up untill now and it wud be a shame to end it now nad possibly regret it later.
my advice wud be to give her another day or 2 and dont contact her!!
And then see if she contacts you,im sure if you give her a day or 2 she'l realise what she really wants.

biko

1. You may have been the rebound guy and she needed a dose of loving before she could let go of the earlier guy.

2. In the beginning of a relation it's so easy to focus on the similarities that you forget about the differences. They eventually show up though.

If she cannot be arsed to contact you back you should definitely have a sit-down with her before you two decide how to move on.

Most PI threads would be eliminated if people just talked to each other more before posting "strangers, what do you think?".

Dublinstiofán

skywalker84 wrote:

i treated her like a real princess and she loved me for it(her last boyfriend treated her like sheet for 3 years, and she broke up with him 3 montyhs ago),

??

Sounds to me that if ya want a long term relationship with her, you have to treat her exactly the way the old boyfriend did, like ****.

She obviously liked being treated like **** if she hung about for three years!
She's obviously not used to being treated well, I'd find someone who is, who will appreciate you.

1 Talk to her about it, if you feel satisfied with the solution, stay where you are for the time being.

or

2 get out. Is she worth the hassle if shes playing up already after 5 weeks?

No use both having Rice krispies in the press if she's ****ing a bowl at your head when your trying to get them!

5starpool

It sounds like you are getting very serious for a 5 week relationship. Chill out, wait til she comes back, meet her and be calm about it, and ask if anything is up as you think she has been acting like there is something wrong. If you don't get a satisfactory answer or get brushed off, then if things don't improve in a few days just end it. No real drama necessary really at this point., there are no kids to fight for custody over (unless that is the secret problem?)

azezil

Best just give her some space, it seems to me she's trying to sort something out in her mind, don't contact her for a couple of days, see if she calls you, if not... then I'd say its over.

spinandscribble

give it a week after shes back- if she hasnt contacted you to say sorry drop her bits over. she'll probably enjoy being treated like sheet again and come running back *roll eyes*

Maple

as hard as it will be, don't contact her. let her sort her head out. just leave it be, give it some time. dont go throwing her stuff in a bag just yet. It could be that she's just getting the wobbles about finding someone so soon, maybe she just doesn't trust your motives just yet. let her work it out in her head, just give her some space. Hope it works out for you.

Caliden

It's onyl been 5 weeks in fairness. Take it easy, coming on too much too fast could scare her off. You make it sound like you're going to marry her.
Take it easy becasue you might see too much of each other and get annoyed.

It could've been 'rag week' last week which would explain the change in mood. Just take it easy and don't be so clingy ringing her every second of every day.

Maple

Caliden wrote:

It's onyl been 5 weeks in fairness. Take it easy, coming on too much too fast could scare her off. You make it sound like you're going to marry her.
Take it easy becasue you might see too much of each other and get annoyed.

It could've been 'rag week' last week which would explain the change in mood. Just take it easy and don't be so clingy ringing her every second of every day.

:eek: :rolleyes: asinine response. just because a woman has been out of sorts, she's obviously on "the rag"? ridiculous.

Kell

U84 wrote:

my head is wrecked, she was to give me a ring when she got out of the cinema but didn't bother her hole for some reason,

Well fúck her then. She is not worth the effort. After five weeks you are still supposed to be up to your elbows in vaginal secretions not having your head wecked by someone. If she is píssing you off, walk. You owe her nothing and you owe yourself everything.

Go find someone nice who doesnt wreck your head who'll you'll still be coming up for air from a year later.

K-

Nevyn

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