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Stargate jokes

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  • 09-06-2007 1:41am
    #1
    neon_glows
    Closed Accounts Posts: 873 ✭✭✭


    How many System Lords does it takes to screw in a light bulb?
    Your god does not screw in a light bulb. Your god holds the light bulb and the universe revolves around me.

    How many Ancients does it take to change a light bulb?
    We view changing light bulbs as futile; they will just keep burning out. So we sunk the city.

    How many Asgard does it take to change a light bulb?
    The Asgard would never invent a light that superheats a small filament of tungsten within a noble gas by passing a strong electrical current through it.

    Daniel: Do you remember that time you lost Machello?
    Jack: Oh, I always figured you were more of a double bass kinda guy...


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    #2
    ixoy
    Moderators, Entertainment Moderators Posts: 17,990 Mod ✭✭✭✭ixoy


    Because it's a classic:

    Jack: Jaffa jokes? Let's hear one of them.
    Teal'c: I will attempt to translate one. A Serpent guard, a Horus guard, and a Setesh guard meet on a neutral planet. It is a tense moment. The Serpent guard's eyes glow. The Horus guard's beak glistens. The Setesh guard's nose drips. (Teal'c starts laughing as everyone stares)


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    #3
    User45701
    Registered Users Posts: 6,905 ✭✭✭User45701


    it was more the way he laughed it was just hysterical


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    #4
    Kojak
    Registered Users Posts: 12,801 ✭✭✭✭Kojak


    ixoy wrote:
    Because it's a classic:

    Jack: Jaffa jokes? Let's hear one of them.
    Teal'c: I will attempt to translate one. A Serpent guard, a Horus guard, and a Setesh guard meet on a neutral planet. It is a tense moment. The Serpent guard's eyes glow. The Horus guard's beak glistens. The Setesh guard's nose drips. (Teal'c starts laughing as everyone stares)

    That was priceless, alright.

    Teal'c laughing his ass off, then he looks around and sees that no-one else is laughing. Pure quality :D


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    #5
    robnubis
    Closed Accounts Posts: 563 ✭✭✭robnubis


    Dont know any myself, but a little quip that i found funny was an outtake from the voice recording of the ill-fated SG1-The Alliance Video Game

    Michael Shanks in the voice of Thor: "I've lost my ass-guard!"


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    #6
    somuj
    Registered Users Posts: 867 ✭✭✭somuj


    Not really a joke but was so funny.

    The episode where one of the Aincents falls for Carter and takes corporial form again. The part where she refuses Teal'c and O'neil entry to her house.

    Jack "so what will we do now"

    Teal'c replies "I have heard of a place where humans do battle in jello"

    Jack "call Daniel"


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