Friends being an issue

LegacyUser

Im 24 and been going out with a girl since december,prior to that i was singal for 3 years,
My Friends seem to be pissed with me for not being around as much,
Like a week ago i was in the pub with my gf and the lads came along i was delighted to see them but i had to go 10 mins later, Cause i was in work in the morning,they all got moody with me,they think im under the thumb.
Which iam not.

Ive been out on saturday nights with them like always and i call down to them when i can,i dont belive in leaving ur friends behind when u get in to a relationship like they have done to me in the past, but i always thought when u get into a serious relationship you spend most of ur time with her.

I love her to bits and love being with her,i love my friends to but they are getting on my nerves at the moment i try my best to see them.

Are my friends being unrational.

Petey2006

You're probably still in the honeymoon period when you want to see your new girlfriend all the time. Your friends are always going to have a problem with that. I think it's natural. But give it a little time and things will settle. It's always been that way in my group of mates anyway.

LegacyUser

I was in the same situation as you. I have been with my g/f for 5 years now.Before her i hadnt dated anyone in a while so it was the first big relationship for me.

Because i never had a long term girlfriend,before my lovely one now..all my mates relied on me being out with them..getting pissed with them..going on trips and so forth.Good ol reliable so n so..

After i started dating with my g\f i saw less of them..and yes..they got cheesed off..but you see they took me for granted.always expecting me to be there to rally the troops.

What i did was ask them..are you pissed off with me? and just see what they say and go from there.Your g\f wont be happy knowing that she might be in the middle of all the tension and will feel responcible..so try to reassure her.

They got over it..they grew up.Give them time and everything will ajust.

Well after 5 years were all great mates and probably know eachother a little better too. They couldnt be happier for myself and my girlfriend as were going from strength to strength.

aye

yeah they are. they are doing it tho cos they probbably miss having you around.
it happen to all blokes when they get a girl, you start to spend less time with your mates.
they should be happy for you tho, and if you still see them on sat night, and one or two nights during the week that would be enough in my opinion. i'm single and don't see my friends more than that.
maybe try going to the gym with them, or playing footie or something that you can stick to each week.
a friend of mine when he got with his girl spelt it out that he plays footie on sunday night and he stuck to it. it meant that even if he was really busy with her all week, we got to seem him.
she should understand this as i'm sure her mates wanna see her too, so talk to her about it.

LegacyUser

She has no problem at all with me going to see my mates and either do i with her seeing her mates,its just i thionk there being a bit irational and i thought they could at least be a happy for me.like we all have to grow up sometime am i wrong

aye

Frustrated83 wrote:

She has no problem at all with me going to see my mates and either do i with her seeing her mates,its just i thionk there being a bit irational and i thought they could at least be a happy for me.like we all have to grow up sometime am i wrong

no your right. but they will get over it.
just dont exclude them from your life from now and you should be fine. yes you'll see them less but they'll get used to it.
i have friend i dont see from one month to the next cos all they do is hang out with their girlfriend, doesnt mean i give them a hard tim about it, they do what makes them happy, your friend will learn to accept that she is now part of your life.

Antigone05

give it time. they will get over themselves. enjoy the time with your girlfriend

LegacyUser

'Thanks everyone for the advise it was very helpful'

Kell

Frustrated83 wrote:

but i always thought when u get into a serious relationship you spend most of ur time with her.

You dont have to. Time apart is as constructive as time together. If you always did certain things with certain people on certain nights, dont stop. If you spent most of your time with your GF, you'll find you may run out of things to talk about.

K-