too much

Jaffa Cake

Hi!,
This is my first time to post here but I really would like to get some advice/opinions on something.

I have been going out with my boyfriend for a year and a half now and we love each other dearly. It really is a fantastic relationship. The only problem is my boyfriend has what seems to be an insatiable appetite for sex. At the moment we have sex about 7 or 8 times a week and this isn't enough for him. He is always looking for more. I've tried talking to him about it but he keeps saying he is a young man in his prime.. he is 25 and I'm 28.

I am studying at the moment and working part time and I'm tired... alot.. but he still keeps "pawing" at me every night... even after we've had sex! I know it's not a bad complaint to have and that he finds me attractive and it would be worse if he didn't but I can't continue like this.. I need my sleep! I think 7 or 8 times a week is plenty for anyone... is it not? Am I being unreasonable?

Kell

Jaffa Cake wrote:

I think 7 or 8 times a week is plenty for anyone...

Sounds normal for two people living together for that period of time yeah. If its annoying you that much, then just tell him no.

K-

kmick

You could just do the extras and not do the full whack 3 times a week which would cut down and get you more sleep. Its his age - it will calm down when he gets older. However lack of it will drive him elsewhere so make sure you look after him if you catch my drift. Also if you initiate more he will calm down. Guys only want what they cant have.

Miss Fluff

Try and coordinate it so that it doesn't interfere with your sleep, i.e. early in the morning/early evening/during the day.

PS, don't think you can ever have too much tbh

biko

It doesn't seem extreme for two new lovers but I guess after a year and half it can get to you if this is what he is like all the time.

ntlbell

Jaffa Cake wrote:

Hi!,
This is my first time to post here but I really would like to get some advice/opinions on something.

I have been going out with my boyfriend for a year and a half now and we love each other dearly. It really is a fantastic relationship. The only problem is my boyfriend has what seems to be an insatiable appetite for sex. At the moment we have sex about 7 or 8 times a week and this isn't enough for him. He is always looking for more. I've tried talking to him about it but he keeps saying he is a young man in his prime.. he is 25 and I'm 28.

I am studying at the moment and working part time and I'm tired... alot.. but he still keeps "pawing" at me every night... even after we've had sex! I know it's not a bad complaint to have and that he finds me attractive and it would be worse if he didn't but I can't continue like this.. I need my sleep! I think 7 or 8 times a week is plenty for anyone... is it not? Am I being unreasonable?

I'm worried about a couple of things here.

1. You consider 7 times a week a lot.

Sex once a day for people your age isn't a lot.

2. You describing him wanted to have sex as "pawing" WTF?

You don't have to have sex at night, have it in the morning after a good nights sleep? when you get in before/ or after dinner.

Explain to him that you do be tired at night and throw out a few ideas on different times etc.

ffs.

AnonoBoy

Yeah. If you've already got into the rountine that in bed at nighttime is the only place and time for sex then you're already on your way to a live of non-excitement.

Try it earlier in the evening - in the kitchen after dinner - wherever!. Tire yourselves out early and then get a good night's sleep!

Jaffa Cake

Hi thanks for the replies.
Unfortunately morning sex really isn't an option! I work 6 14 hr shifts a week (3 are unpaid part of my course and 3 are paid part time work)
I don't think my boyfriend would be too impressed at me waking him up at 5:30am! I do try to give him lots of attention on my one day off but alot of the time I have essays to do etc... I guess he'll just have to be understanding for the next 2 yrs till I graduate!

Shelli

Jaffa Cake wrote:

I don't think my boyfriend would be too impressed at me waking him up at 5:30am!

Just like you none too impressed with his "pawing" at you when your tired. Try waking him once or twice, he'll soon get the idea that it's not much fun when your exhausted!

Isobel

Jaffa Cake wrote:

I don't think my boyfriend would be too impressed at me waking him up at 5:30am!

He will if you wake him up with a blow-job!


Sorry had to be said

Mrs_Doyle

ntlbell wrote:

I'm worried about a couple of things here.

1. You consider 7 times a week a lot.

Sex once a day for people your age isn't a lot.

I love the way everyone likes to make out that their having 24/7 sex marathons.

7 times a week is a lot if your absolutely wrecked tired.
Sex is going to feel like a chore at this rate, the girl needs some sleep!

OP, I bet ya if you had a weekend without sex you would be well rested, and gagging for it, by the following Monday.

Do ya think he would agree to this?

aibby

I know where you are coming from I used to go out with someone and he wanted sex every morning and every night. I can tell you that I got sick of it. There was no fun in it because I felt I had to have sex even when I didn't feel like it.
To answer your question, I would agree that sex every day is excessive and can lead to boredom. Dont mind the others who say sex every day is normal. Its not.

I'd say the norm would be 2/3 times week if you are in a long term relationship.

boffin

Wow If you're working 6 x 14 hour shifts a week and going to college ---I have no idea how you have the energy or time 7 or 8 times a week--- so imo your boyfriend should thank his lucky stars.

Could your boyfriend not take up a physical sport such as running or something like that in the evenings and burn up some of that extra energy he has?