gfs mates up to something?

LegacyUser

I apoligise in advance as this will be long

I was with my GF Jane for 2 years- she was the love of my life and the nicest person you could meet. I idolized her- but stupidly one night I fell into temptation and slept with someone. I ran all over the place to make sure people didn’t tell her- but I was too late. She left me the next day. I was and still am heartbroken. I was texting her and calling her begging for forgiveness and told her id do anything she wanted.

This is where it gets weird

(First a bita backround info)Im fairly well off-Ive a great job and car- own house(which was left to me by my folks) I own stocks and I have a good few grand in the bank. jane worked in a supermarket and was always strapped for cash but she NEVER asked me for money and wouldn’t let me pay for anything(meals etc) I know money was never important to her.

So you can imagine my surprise when I got a text from her saying” I will take u back IF you give me 1000 euro”- I was stunned- and then I got very mad so I text her back saying “How dare u blackmail me”- and she said “Im not blackmailing u- u said ud do anything to prove how much I mean to u- so part with ur money seen as its so important to u”

I sat down and thought about it………….. this girl has NO interest in money…….. BUT she has 3 little witches for friends-These 3 are the most evil cows on the planet. They “play “ guys and leave when the money is gone. One of them even tried to blackmail me once- saying she would tell my gf I tried it on with her if I didn’t give her money. Ive a funny feeling they are behind it cos honestly this Janes is not into money at all.

Anyway I agreed to give her the money but on the day I was ment to meet her to give her it I got held up at work so I text her and told her that. Then my phone rang and Janes number flashed up- I answered and I expected to hear Jane but it was one of her friends who simply said ” Jane and us KNEW you were full of ****-Now she will never look at u again” and hung up.

I tried to call her back and the phone was off, so I called over to Janes and she answered- Took one look at me and burst into tears. I told her that I was sorry and handed the 1000 euro to her. She looked directly at me and said ”I never wanted the money just leave me alone all of u ”She threw the money at me and kicked me out.

Two hours later I got a text from a number I didn’t know that said “Jane said she wants that money tomorrow and you better have it.

And now im confused-she told me HERSELF that she didn’t want it but im getting texts from her friends saying something TOTALLY different.

Are her friends up to something ????????? And If so why is Jane going along with this- or is she?

cournioni

It's her friends I am nearly certain. Just make sure that you let Jane know what is happening. Show her the text if you still have it.

biko

Speak to Jane only.
Explain the situation from you point of view
Save the text as proof

Do not wedge between her and the friends. Explain "I didn't think you wanted the money but then I got this text" and see what she has to say for herself and her friends.

If you do get back with her you're gonna have to see these people often so be gentle

Zambia

Never bring money into this again. You and your ex need to work this one out.

Oh and FFS if this relationship is important to you try ringing. Texting is for kids.

Oh in my opinion these witches are laughing at you. If you cant get your ex somewhere neutral you are sunk. Plus your begging is lowering you in the eyes of your ex.

You have F**ked up, you did it you made that mistake. Accept the mistake hope she forgives you and ffs be a man about it. Hopefully she can see past it but be prepared if she cant. Put yourself in her shoes and see if you could.

LegacyUser

Dont give her cash. I would book and bring her to a nice hotel for the night and out for dinner -tell her that you are willing to spend the €1000 on you both getting back together but you are not an ATM. She sounds a little mixed up and Im sure her friends have something to do with it - in saying that its coming from her phone so she knows what is going on. Its a strange one......

As an aside, why do you think you wouldnt cheat on her again??? I'm sure she will find it very hard to trust you again - not only did you cheat on her but you tried to get people to lie for you and cover your tracks. I think this makes it even harder to forgive....

BeardyGit

It's tough being heartbroken....

....But plain stupid to think you can buy love. What were you thinking man? Were you seriously going to pay your girlfriend to forgive you for sleeping with someone else? And you really thought that was going to work in some way? I don't care if it was her, or her friends. It was a stupid, stupid thing to think you could pay to make the problem go away.

You did nothing but make it look like you think she's a money grabbing bitch, who'd put money above being treated with respect. You blew it. You're done for. NOTHING you do now will save this situation.

Gil

zeusnero

bladfgfghfhg wrote:

I idolized her- but stupidly one night I fell into temptation and slept with someone. I ran all over the place to make sure people didn’t tell her- but I was too late. She left me the next day. I was and still am heartbroken.

Anybody see any similarities here from a certain US sitcom???

Anyway why the hell didn't you just come clean and tell her yourself, at least that would've shown some balls - plus how big a trail could there have been?

Saying that, it looks like these girls are trying to play you and have a certain amount of influence over your (ex)girlfriend. Unless you can talk to her, by herself then imo there's no chance.

King of Kings

give nobody any money.
jane will take you back if she wants no money is going to change this.
the fact that you were willing to buy her love back says a lot about you - i can only assume you did this in a moment of panic or weakness , but tbh it comes across that you feel that you can buy her love back.

Ignore her friends but in fairness your relationship doesn't stand much of a chance if she has such friends constantly in her ear

My advice is to keep your cash and move on.

Jotter

[QUOTE=bladfgfghfhg

I was with my GF Jane for 2 years- she was the love of my life and the nicest person you could meet. I idolized her- but stupidly one night I fell into temptation and slept with someone. [/QUOTE]

thats the stupidest thing Ive ever heard - you dont idolize the love of your life and then sleep with someone else just out of the blue. Youre looking back on your realationship through rose coloured glasses me thinks. If you want her back you guys need to forget abuot money and friends and all that and talk about how things were, why you REALLY cheated and if she can trust you again etc etc.

and yes I agree totally with the person who said stop texting and call her.

Marksie

Gil_dub summarised it. You screwed up all along the way.

But what is done now is done.

The thing that strikes me is that her "friends" seem to be playing jane the same way they play men.

No money should change hands.

If necessary, all you can do in articulate all this in a letter and leave it at that. no contact, no face to face, put it down in writing and just let it go now.

LoGiE

Thats scary to be honest with you.... Trying to extort money from you is a vile thing for anyone to do. Cut your loses and hope you never see jane or her psycho mates again.

Carrigart Exile

Stop all contact immediately. Absolutely do not part with any cash and refuse point blank to have any further discussions with Jane whilst her friends are there.

kittenkiller

Work on getting her to talk to you and forgive you before you ask any other questions.
Forget the money, it really does sound like her "friends" are manipulating her and if you hand over cash in exchange for forgiveness, everyone except for the coven of witches will end up disappointed.

She sounds like a really nice girl. Don't give up on her and don't think that you can pay for forgiveness.

Grovel, plead, beg... But give her some time to calm down and start thinking for herself first.

You're in a terrible situation. Don't make it worse by going along thinking you want to be with someone that you can just buy off.

Mezcita

Fundamentally you couldn't have loved her that much if you decided to sleep with someone else. People always use the "I was hammered" excuse but deep down it was a decision you made yourself. Learn from it. She wasen't the one for you.

As for the money, ignore the texts. Just her mates messing about.

Thomas_S_Hunterson

Mezcita wrote:

Fundamentally you couldn't have loved her that much if you decided to sleep with someone else. People always use the "I was hammered" excuse but deep down it was a decision you made yourself. Learn from it. She wasen't the one for you.

As for the money, ignore the texts. Just her mates messing about.

Ah now come on, that's a bit of a naive attitude, the OP (I assume) is human and as such, subject to temptation.

you must have been pretty mentally screwed over by events to be going to her house and agreeing to give her €1000.

The proper thing to do when that was first mentioned was to THEN call over to "jane's" house and ask wtf!?!

Texts are the work of the Devil.

In actual fact pm's are the work of the devil.

Mezcita

sean_keevey wrote:

Ah now come on, that's a bit of a naive attitude, the OP (I assume) is human and as such, subject to temptation.

I don't think its really being naive. Course, we're all human and we all see people who we may be attracted to on a daily basis. However, following through when you are apparantly in love with someone else is completely a different scenario.

If the OP began this story by saying that he woke up and did not realise how he managed to end up beside this random girl, then I may understand a little.

Problem is that he didn't. We all have the little voice telling us not score somebody else when we are going out with a person we feel for. However, people frequently ignore that voice.

I mean what's the OP's other half meant to do? Tell him not to worry about it and give him a big hug?

He got busted, should try and learn from it, and move on.

MojoMaker

bladfgfghfhg wrote:

I apoligise in advance as this will be long

I was with my GF Jane for 2 years- she was the love of my life and the nicest person you could meet. I idolized her- but stupidly one night I fell into temptation and slept with someone. I ran all over the place to make sure people didn’t tell her- but I was too late. She left me the next day. I was and still am heartbroken. I was texting her and calling her begging for forgiveness and told her id do anything she wanted.

This is where it gets weird

(First a bita backround info)Im fairly well off-Ive a great job and car- own house(which was left to me by my folks) I own stocks and I have a good few grand in the bank. jane worked in a supermarket and was always strapped for cash but she NEVER asked me for money and wouldn’t let me pay for anything(meals etc) I know money was never important to her.

So you can imagine my surprise when I got a text from her saying” I will take u back IF you give me 1000 euro”- I was stunned- and then I got very mad so I text her back saying “How dare u blackmail me”- and she said “Im not blackmailing u- u said ud do anything to prove how much I mean to u- so part with ur money seen as its so important to u”

I sat down and thought about it………….. this girl has NO interest in money…….. BUT she has 3 little witches for friends-These 3 are the most evil cows on the planet. They “play “ guys and leave when the money is gone. One of them even tried to blackmail me once- saying she would tell my gf I tried it on with her if I didn’t give her money. Ive a funny feeling they are behind it cos honestly this Janes is not into money at all.

Anyway I agreed to give her the money but on the day I was ment to meet her to give her it I got held up at work so I text her and told her that. Then my phone rang and Janes number flashed up- I answered and I expected to hear Jane but it was one of her friends who simply said ” Jane and us KNEW you were full of ****-Now she will never look at u again” and hung up.

I tried to call her back and the phone was off, so I called over to Janes and she answered- Took one look at me and burst into tears. I told her that I was sorry and handed the 1000 euro to her. She looked directly at me and said ”I never wanted the money just leave me alone all of u ”She threw the money at me and kicked me out.

Two hours later I got a text from a number I didn’t know that said “Jane said she wants that money tomorrow and you better have it.

And now im confused-she told me HERSELF that she didn’t want it but im getting texts from her friends saying something TOTALLY different.

Are her friends up to something ????????? And If so why is Jane going along with this- or is she?

Stop being a wuss and grow a pair of ****ing balls. Paying a bird to stay with you - what the **** next? :rolleyes:

Moojuice

Dont give her ANY money and if her friends call or text reply and tell them the guards are involved and you are passing all texts and topics of conversations on to them, that should scare them ****less. It sounds extremely dodgy, but so does you story in fairness.

Explosive_Cornflake

Jotter wrote:

thats the stupidest thing Ive ever heard - you dont idolize the love of your life and then sleep with someone else just out of the blue. Youre looking back on your realationship through rose coloured glasses me thinks. If you want her back you guys need to forget abuot money and friends and all that and talk about how things were, why you REALLY cheated and if she can trust you again etc etc.

and yes I agree totally with the person who said stop texting and call her.

Sometimes that's what just happens

de5p0i1er

My 2cents:
Her friends are trying to screw you out of money stay the hell away from them and let her know whats going on.

SarahSassy

They obviously got your number from her??

WindSock

Did Jane not think it was wierd that her 'friends' were using her phone to text you? Surely it is obvious that it is her friends doings, would you not have told them to get f-cked and what business is it to do with them when you were talking to them? This is a very odd story. Don't part with your money, you are not a cash cow. To be swindled out of money for your emotions is vile.

Chinafoot

boreds wrote:

To be swindled out of money for your emotions is vile.

So is thinking you can buy forgiveness.

OP, you fúcked up.

You cheated on your girlfriend and you hurt her. Her friends think you're a bastard and perhaps want to show your ex just how much of a bastard you are in case she's considering taking you back.

They worked out a perfect way to do it. "Look, he thinks he can buy you! Do you want to be with someone like that?!"

Jane's reaction to your arrival shows just how fed up she is with both sides. She's being pressured by her mates to screw you over and see what a bastard you are and she's being pressured by you to take you back after you screwed her over.

The poor girl must be completely heartbroken.

I agree that these girls sound like a pack of bítches and if you knew that you should have ignored them, especially when money was brought into the equation. All you did was prove that you think you can buy her and thats going to push her further away.

Personally I think you should do the decent thing and leave Jane alone.

Rattlehead_ie

TBH,

It may not JUST be Janes friends that are trying to screw you over........ after you sayed you called over and she said
"I didnt want the money"
She obviously knows about the money thing and maybe just maybe, she wanted you to prove yourself to her. She and her friends never wanted the 1k, it was the point that you would throw something like that easily at her no questions asked just to be with her......... when you were late to meet her to give her the money, she thought that you werent willing? you understand?

Now this brings up another issue........... she was never going to take the 1K off you, but is this how she value's your relationship, I would understand her point but only 1K.

My opinion, talk to her if you can, sit her town explain that you would give 10 times as much to be with her, she doesnt want the money she personaly values 1K as alot same way as Im sure she values and loved your relationship.
If she does take the money.......... take it straight back off her, PIHB and run away!!!!!!!!!