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To lie or not to lie

  • 03-04-2007 11:56am
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭


    I've been going out with my current girlfriend for the almost nine months. She was the first person i ever slept with and i was hers. Problem is she thinks i have slept with other people before her and stupidly i confirmed that, now this has become an issue over the last few days and seeing as up to now i was never honest with her about that i feel i should come clean, however i 'm afraid she'll stop trusting me and start doubting other things i've told her, so should i ease my conscience and come clean or carry on lying while she is blissfully unaware??


Comments

  • #2
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Deal with it. Don't tell her.


  • #3
    Femelade
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,820 ✭✭✭Femelade


    how has it become an issue over the last few days?


  • #4
    Fizman
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,605 ✭✭✭Fizman


    Unregged wrote:
    should i ease my conscience and come clean or carry on lying while she is blissfully unaware??

    Leave her blissfully unaware of the x amount of women she thinks you have slept with??

    My two cents would be (if it is such an issue in your relationship) to tell her exactly how it is, that when you didnt know her so well you foolishly went along with the person she had assumed you were. (i.e. she thinks your a good looking lad who has probably had his fair share of women). I think this is common enough for a partner to think first off.

    However it does depend on her level of maturity as to how she will react. Some girls may understand why you initially did lie so as to hide possible embarassment as a result of your inexperience. Others may be a little harder to convince (less mature women). Tell her because I dont think this is an issue that will just vanish regardless.


  • #5
    Mr. Incognito
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,798 ✭✭✭Mr. Incognito


    I'd come clean. No-one is going to resent the fact that they were your first. In fact she'll be delighted and if you tell her that you were embarrassed but now you just want to be honest with her and don't feel like you have to prove yourself then she'll be delighted, and trust you more not less.


  • #6
    dame
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,623 ✭✭✭dame


    SetantaL wrote:
    I'd come clean. No-one is going to resent the fact that they were your first. In fact she'll be delighted and if you tell her that you were embarrassed but now you just want to be honest with her and don't feel like you have to prove yourself then she'll be delighted, and trust you more not less.

    Agreed.

    There was a thread late last year posted by someone else with this same issue.


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