worried!!

crazy2000

hi ya all, was woundering if u can help me?

I have had a boyfriend for over 3 years now and i love him to bits.. he was my first rea boyfriend and things seem to be ging well so far...

the only problem is now and again i kind of go through a phase where i tink i cud be a lesbian.. I dont no why i keep questioning myslef about this but it is really starting to wory me now..

I look at girls and say yea they have a nice figure and ass why cudnt i have a figure like that... although i do have a nice figure but ya no girls were never happy with ourslefs..

anyways could this constant questioning be telling me something or are my parniod?

please help...

Boston

Sounds more like you're jealous of /envy other women rather then you want to be with one. How does the thought of being with anotehr woman in the same way as you're with your boyfriend make you feel?

jesus smith

well i have that too where ill look at a guy and think hes attractive butits purely an envious of his appearance thing, i have no actual sexual feeling for him at all. but i was freaked out about it for awhile when i was younger then someone suggested visualising having sex with them and it wasn't arousing. maybe try that?
If you are actually getting aroused by women then its no problem if your still attracted to your boyfriend.
you may just be bi?

frizzefreckles

hi crazy2000,
to me it sounds as though you are just doing what we all do - comparing yourself to other people. I look at other girls and think god I would love her legs, hair or ass. None of those things make me a lesbian as I'm not sexually attracted to them. As the other posters have said are you being aroused by these women you are looking at?

crazy2000

frizzefreckles wrote:

hi crazy2000,
to me it sounds as though you are just doing what we all do - comparing yourself to other people. I look at other girls and think god I would love her legs, hair or ass. None of those things make me a lesbian as I'm not sexually attracted to them. As the other posters have said are you being aroused by these women you are looking at?

I think to be honest youse cud be right in saying i more envy these woman.. I hate the thought of another woman in our relationship.

Jumpy

Well I would like to look like Bautista off the WWE, but that doesnt make me gay.
Dont worry, guys in general will not have any issues with you looking at other women for whatever reason.
Just dont go overboard when looking at guys.
Having a more powerful attraction to the same sex than the opposite is more likely an indicator, but I dont think that is the case with you.

Talliesin

Tori Amos was asked if she was into women by an interviewer.

She said, "well, when I met k. d. lang she looked at me over her sunglasses and I just wanted to crawl into her arms, but there's a hell of a difference between wanting to crawl into her arms and wanting to give her head".

Seems a sensible enough dividing line.

Kell

Talliesin wrote:

Seems a sensible enough dividing line.

Damnit. You beat me to it. I was going to say that if the op had the urge to eat carpet, then maybe. What she describes isnt really being into other women.

K-

yellowdoor

I used to go out with a guy for three years and it turned out that I was a lesbian!! Things are way better now

rainbow kirby

To me it sounds more like admiration/envy than attraction... if you were fantasising about them then that'd be an indicator that you were something other than a Kinsey scale 0, but it just seems to be general woman envy "if I lose 10lb I could look like that" sort of thing. Nothing to worry about!
(Why do you think so many women read fashion magazines? "I want to look like that!")

Catari Jaguar

I've read that all girls are bi. Which makes sense cos it's not weird for them to hold hands or hug or dance sexily together or get changed in each others company. If men did that it'd be odd, but perfectly acceptable for women. Apparently they like pretty boys because they look feminine or something.

Every girl looks at other girls in envy or awe, and obviously you at some stage will think "oh wow, she's hot" like some celebrity or something. I have loadsa celeb girls that I think are hot eye candy, but I've been going out with someone 3 years and just saw 300 and yea, I love men. So I don't think it means anything other than you appreciate hot.

As it was said in SATC to a sexually confused Charlotte: "If you're not willing to eat pu*sy, you're not a dyke"

Also, now that you're paranoid about it, you're making an issue out of it and making things seem worse in your head.. so stop!

Doodee

I'm willing to eat pussy

Catari Jaguar

Maybe you're bi? Twice the fish in the sea.

Esel

Doodee wrote:

I'm willing to eat pussy

You so gay!

OP, you don't sound gay at all. Think of all the girls who look at your body and are envious, but not attracted to you. That will put things in perspective.

Nevyn

Doodee no trolling allowed.

Carrigart Exile

the only problem is now and again i kind of go through a phase where i tink i cud be a lesbian.. I dont no why i keep questioning myslef about this but it is really starting to wory me now..

Welcome to human sexuality pet, its a b@gger. Most people find their mind once or twice will wander to wonder, don't worry about it.

Boston

Carrigart Exile wrote:

the only problem is now and again i kind of go through a phase where i tink i cud be a lesbian.. I dont no why i keep questioning myslef about this but it is really starting to wory me now..

You realise the vast majority of hetrosexuals do that at some point in there life. You're far from odd.

JC 2K3

Lil Kitten wrote:

I've read that all girls are bi. Which makes sense cos it's not weird for them to hold hands or hug or dance sexily together or get changed in each others company. If men did that it'd be odd, but perfectly acceptable for women. Apparently they like pretty boys because they look feminine or something.

Load of crap tbh. The fact it's "not acceptable" for guys to act like that is all a macho stereotype enforced by society.

@OP: If you are happy with your boyfriend you are not a lesbian. Perhaps you're bi, but that all depends on whether you're actualy attracted to these girls, as mentioned previously.