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Paddy Power Shrinks in Bizarre Poker Accident

  • 01-04-2007 4:42pm
    #1
    pokerpaddy
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 37 ✭


    hessosmallfl8.jpg

    Paddy Power Shrinks in Bizarre Poker Accident
    Bookie vows never to play poker with Witch Doctor Ever Again

    Irish Bookmaker Paddy Power is today coming to terms with having shrunk to just over six centimetres in height. Medical staff are struggling to explain how normally healthy Paddy has shrivelled down to a not-so-fun-sized two inches.

    Consultants from the Dublin Institute of Micro Medicine believe his pea-sized brain has probably not coped very well with the reduction. It is now the size of a ball-bearing. Responding to this in a barely audible chirping noise Paddy said “The voodoo who do what you don’t dare do people”

    In a press conference held Thursday evening, Paddy’s distraught wife commented that “Paddy was never a big man, but what he lacked in size he made up for in personality,” holding back the tears she asked “What am I meant to do with a finger of a husband?”

    Company representatives are hopeful that they will be able to source the person responsible for this atrocity and get Paddy back to full size for next weekend’s €2Million Irish Poker Open which will be aired on RTE TWO on Saturday, Sunday and Monday at 11.30pm.

    TV producers are confident they can make clever use of camera angles to make Paddy appear normal sized on screen.


Comments

  • #2
    The Clamper
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,317 ✭✭✭The Clamper


    i bet the witch docor's hardest job was reducing his ego to suit the new mini-sized Paddy

    i heard Samanth Mumba's dad, Peter, is over here at the moment and i feel quite confident that for a few beads, a bag of salt and a mirror, he would be able to bring back Paddy to his normal larger-than-life stature

    i'll give Peter a call now and see if he can do some of that Voodoo stuff he learned in Zambia before they exiled him to this green country of ours

    imagine having a choice of country to be exiled to, so that you could be a fairly reclusive personality and somehow choosing Ireland, then his daughter becoming a famous singer / entertainer and making him famous all over again, now what are the odds of that Paddy ???

    Paddy's odds of survival should be good, but there is never a bookie around when you want one

    could this be a ruse by Paddy and his team in an effort to avoid handing out €2 Million next weekend ? will there be an overlay ? is there odds being offered on how many players will turn up and cough up the necessary cash ?

    i am also interested in the odds of my being placed 457th, if the odds are good enough and i can get enough on, i believe i could last that long and bust out on any hand, this could be more worth while than winning it and so much easier :cool:


  • #3
    The Clamper
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,317 ✭✭✭The Clamper


    OK, I SPOKE TO PETER MUMBA AND HE PASSED ME ON TO A GUY IN PARNELL STREET WHO SHOWED ME A VIDEO FROM THE 1960's CALLED "Land of the Giants"
    it was only then that i realised that we had all been taken in by this crazy-take-the-piss April fools joke.

    and all the trouble i went to

    not impressed at all Paddy...i hope you park legally,,, thats all i'm saying


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