Readjusting After Year Away

Anselm

Hi there everyone, would like a few opinions on this, I know a lot of us have been there.
I have recently returned from a year away travelling the world, best year I have ever had, fantastic, but now I am back ! I have had mixed feelings long before I came home, even though I was looking forward to seeing family & friends.
Anyway, I am feeling very out of sorts and depressed to be honest. Have a job sorted, which is good, but I feel like I am back where I was a year ago, living with my parents again, which feels very awkward, they really welcomed me home and threw me a party, but they feel hurt because of my mood, which I am ashamed to admit hasnt been good, I just cant shake the depressing feeling of being back in a rut. I feel very guilty about ruining the big homecoming which they all worked so hard on, and a bit worried about readjusting to Ireland.
Would welcome any thoughts and advice if possible.
Thank you

rediguana

I feel your pain. I came home in 2003. I didn't even want to, but my money ran out.

I still miss being abroad. If it's important to you, cultivate a career (nurse, teacher) that makes future foreign travel easy.

In the meantime, try not to mope around. Nobody will understand anyway

empirix

I hear ya buddy, was away travelling for two years and got back January 06 - with my Swedish soon to be wife, have not really settled here, same old same old, only hanging around cause of my wonderful chick, family and friends etc. I am content but was much happier away, already i've packed in two jobs and into my third(and these are high end jobs) which is worrying, everyday at my desk i think about the times i was away and the job i had while living in Oz/Bangkok. Probably still in no mans land regarding what decision to take, its hard, parents are getting on, my girl is happy living here. As i said, i am content here but know i could be happier somewhere else but hey i could be hell of a lot worse off. My advice is give it time, you'll have a better understanding of where you want to be in 6 months time, then make a decision, try to think positively and think about what you got(family friends etc). Travelling is brilliant but you have to settle at some stage in life, no matter how much it sucks

Tak3n

get a job in a foreign country... marry a foreign girl

susanna

Anselm how long have you been home?

I came home from Australia in December and at first it was horrible. I felt completely out of sorts and it took me a while to settle back into life here. I was depressed too and felt terrible for my parents and friends because they were so happy to see me and all I could do was mope! But it does get easier, once you start working that will help. Just try to keep yourself busy!

If you're certain that Ireland is not for you, its worth checking out the work/visa situation in the countries you visited.

Its been three months home for me now and it nearly feels like last year was all just a dream!

Anselm

Susanna, Im only home a week to be honest with you - the big issue for me is that my Family were so hurt that I was so underwhelmed to come back....I hope that time will make it easier to adjust - im sure it will, but right now I dont feel to great about myself...very guilty

Zambia

Anselm wrote:

Susanna, Im only home a week to be honest with you - the big issue for me is that my Family were so hurt that I was so underwhelmed to come back....I hope that time will make it easier to adjust - im sure it will, but right now I dont feel to great about myself...very guilty

Im home ten years ,,, Still think about it but I dont have the money too spend my life traveling and staying put has its ups too. So my ass is planted till I find the cash to change that.

Trust me it will be fine. Just get back to finding a job you like or get busy finding a traveling job if thats what you want. Re-training is a possiblity you should know by know what a great big world it is.

Travelling jobs appeal greatly as there is no pressure you know this is not your career plus they dont need to pay great as you need less cash.

If you spend your life looking back you tend to go around in circles.

John Mason

been there done that .........it will take about a year to settle back but i know this sounds really harsh, dont meet up with any of the irish people you meet abroad. it just prolongs the pain.........wait a year or so before you meet uo with them

drunkenfool

its takes me months and months to settle back in properly after ive been away, even if i was only away for a few weeks. you always have fun when your abroad, i guess its part of life really.

Talliesin

Anselm wrote:

the big issue for me is that my Family were so hurt that I was so underwhelmed to come back.

For your family your homecoming meant that you, who had been away, was now back. To them it was all exciting and good.

To you, while you got to see your family again, it meant that a particularly exciting period in your life was over.

It's only natural that there should be an imbalance in perception here.

k974

i've been gone 3 years and cant face moving back either

LegacyUser

'Anti-climax, happens to everyone. I'm depressed when i get back from a two week holiday with my mates, let alone going away for a year.

Start planning your next trip! '

mossym

k974 wrote:

i've been gone 3 years and cant face moving back either

neither could i after 3 years..after 6 years i couldn't wait to get home

WindSock

Maybe try getting another Working Visa for somewhere else. Head off again until you feel ready to come home. It took me the best part of 4 years. I knew there was no way I could return until I myself felt like I wanted to.

LegacyUser

'Hi I know alot of people in this situation although I have never personally been in it myself! I think life for us young people nowadays is really confusing and a bit bewildering..The travel thing is a perfect example..we have so much easier, choices and oppurtunities that generations before us had to work harder and longer to achieve, and its like that once they pass, we are left feeling empty and constantly searching for the next thing...I suppose you have to focus on your daily routine o.p., take each day at a time, ask yourself what is it you really want from your life?'

LegacyUser

'I know how you feel; I came back from Erasmus and felt like "Well, here I am again" and felt like everybody was acting like I hadn't been away at all. My family and friends just didn't understand how I was feeling, and would constantly tell me to cheer up, which of course just made me worse. Once you get back into the swing of things back home, you'll probably find it's not on your mind so much anymore.'