Dirty Tenant

Dr.Bunson

I have my own place (I'll be paying the mortgage for the rest of my life, but it's mine). I took a friend in as a tenant a few months ago, both to help him out and to help myself (pay the mortgage). As a friend I have asked him for less than the market rate for the rent. I never have a problem with him paying the rent, but I find that he is absolutely filthy. There are only two of us in the house. I find myself having to pick up everything after him, food and wrappers off the couch, and the floor. I regularly have to un-block the kitchen sink. I only use the en-suite bathroom to do all my bathroom stuff, and he uses the main bathroom. I have had to clean bathroom recently before I had a party as I was so embarrassed with the state he has left it in (I won't go into the details, but the white ceramic toilet isn't exactly white anymore). I have to apologies to my friends and family if they need to use the bathroom when they are visiting for the state of it. I have had words with him about the dirt but he doesn't consider it a problem. He's too "busy" to clean up after himself.

I've asked him to clean up, and he has not. And now after yet another ECB interest rate rise I have had to increase the rent a little (to help me with the mortgage).

This is my home, and it is like a pig sty. I can't live like this any more. But equally, I feel that this situation will end our friendship.

I'm looking for advice, should I kick him out, or should I put up with the filth?

KTRIC

You have two options here, you kick him out or you continue to act like his bitch and pick up everything after him.

Nevyn

Lay sown the lay you are not his mother cleeaning up after him and he should shape up or ship out.

cold_filter

tell him you are doing him a favour by letting him stay at less than the market rate and if he doesnt clean up his act he can go pay the full rate somewhere else

Jocksy

Thats the price you pay for buying a house you can't afford.

DamoKen

Jocksy wrote:

Thats the price you pay for buying a house you can't afford.

very insightful and helpful, at what point does the OP say he can't afford a mortgage?

I've had tenants in before, doesn't mean I can't afford the mortgage, couple of hundred euro extra in your pocket though is nice to have.

OP, sounds like your friend is either taking advantage of your friendship, or is just plain dirty. Maybe he's used to his mother cleaning up after him? Up to you but if someone was taking the p*ss like that in my place and ignored reasonable requests to clean up their act and help out, they'd be asked politely to leave within the month.

Cantab.

DamoKen wrote:

very insightful and helpful, at what point does the OP say he can't afford a mortgage?

I've had tenants in before, doesn't mean I can't afford the mortgage, couple of hundred euro extra in your pocket though is nice to have.

OP, sounds like your friend is either taking advantage of your friendship, or is just plain dirty. Maybe he's used to his mother cleaning up after him? Up to you but if someone was taking the p*ss like that in my place and ignored reasonable requests to clean up their act and help out, they'd be asked politely to leave within the month.

I used to live with a chap (very nice guy and all) in his house (he's minted and his dad owns a farm and about 30 other gaffs). Anyway, the guy just couldn't look after himself having spent all his life in boarding school. Jacks and kitchen constantly in a mess - when I tidied he just messed up the place again. Some men just need wives or mammies - I've come across this a couple of times. I reckon it's time to go nuclear - i.e. you move out or he does. Try the stern words with him on the understanding that if the mess happens again, he's out.

There are some good articles if you google "Doing business with friends and family".

Noelie

Jocksy wrote:

Thats the price you pay for buying a house you can't afford.

bit of a stupid response and totally OT, if i was the OP i'd report you. you just sound jealous the the OP has bought himself a place to live.

Your mate has to go, he won't change espically since you've been cleaning up after him all this time. if you can do without the rent just tell him you don't want a lodger anymore, or don't take in another lodger for a few months as kicking him out could strain your friendship.

gandalf

Give him a final warning and make it clear to him that if he doesn't pull his weight within a month he is out.

BingoWings

I've been in this situation and after I vowed never to rent a room to friends after.

We parted ways, as we couldn't live together, and remained friends after.

Kick him out now before you end up resenting him and the relationship is lost.

tbh

you tell him you are doing him a favour by renting to him at less than market rates. You also point out that, initially it suited both parties to enter that agreement, now it doesn't suit you anymore because if you got someone else in, they would pay more rent and keep the place clean. You then ask him why is it in your interest to let him stay. If you keep making empty threats, he'll continue to extract the urine. It's time to get tough!

Glowing

If he can't get off his arse to clean up after himself, suggest he pays for a cleaner to come in once or twice a week?

Edit: Alternatively, you could try picking up everything he leaves lying around and pile it into his room - dirty dishes, wrappers, laundry etc. He'll soon get the idea .....

alliekatt

Just charge him by the hour for your cleaning services and add it to the rent. If he complains, it's nothing personal; it's your precious time he is wasting and it's your time, not his. If he wants to make it his he needs to pay for it. Case closed.

Why does it seem only straight men can be nasty to such an alarming degree...*sigh* he sounds like my ex-husband lol.

DonJose

Jocksy wrote:

Thats the price you pay for buying a house you can't afford.

I agree 100% with the remarks above. It sounds like the OP invested in a property that was beyond his means and had to rent a room to supplement his mortgage.

Noelie wrote:

bit of a stupid response and totally OT, if i was the OP i'd report you. you just sound jealous the the OP has bought himself a place to live..

Are you serious, what is there to be jealous of. The OP is renting a room to a slob, he has no privacy in his own home nevermind hygiene, because more than likely he does not have the means to facilitate the current mortage he undertook. There have been 7 interest rises in the past 15 months which have probably increased his mortgage by at least €300/month, with the prospect of more interest rises to come.

Victor

OK folks, back off on the "can't afford the mortgage" comments. It is perfectly reasonable to use a spare room to accommodate someone, especially with property in demand.

There are other ways of dropping hints if you don't want to confront him yet!

Putting a mop & bucket next to his bed along with other cleaning materials, not so subtle notices "please clean up" strategicaly placed where he messes as well.

If you offer him two rates one with maid service & one without, He'd probably pay the higher rate (may even pay for a cleaner instead of you doing it) if you up the rent enough.