Suicidal Friend

LegacyUser

I don't know what more I can do. A good friend of mine has been really depressed recently, and has started talking about killing himself, saying that he would be better off dead, and that if he does it, that I should look at it, that he made his own choice, and did what he wanted to do, and that suicide shouldn't be looked at as something bad.
I realize that he is sick and needs help. I don't mean that in a bad way, it's the truth. He said that he's been to a therapist, and that he didn't help him at all.
I told him that he should see another therapist, and that depression is temporary, suicide isn't. He says he has been depressed for over 10 years. He recently had a bad breakup, and also has a history of family members who have killed themselves.

I told him that it's not true that nobody would care if he killed himself, that I'm his friend, and I want to help him. I also made him promise, he would seek help. I don't know if he will. At this point, I don't know if there's anything else I can do. I'm really worried about him. He said he has tried to kill himself several times before, and showed me the scars. He has also started to cut himself, to, in his words, see if he still feels anything.
I don't know what to do. I know, he can get over his depression, and I've told him this, but he doesn't seem convinced.
Has anyone here been in a similar situation? What should I do? Should I call someone for him?

LegacyUser

You definitely need to get help for him. I have been in exactly the same situation, you could almost be talking about my ex (recent break-up, history in family, says exactly the same things). We broke up recently, any time I tried to leave him before he'd threaten to kill himself so I'd just stay but this time I just had to leave him then he started making threats to me and to himself so after getting the police involved they advised if he threatens to kill himself again I need to let them know straight away because I was advised not to talk to him because of his threats to me. Even if he's just saying it as a cry for help then it's obvious he needs help. He probably has a few psychological conditions that need dealt with but may feel uneasy seeking help himself, he might feel it's a bit silly and doesn't want to bother other people. I don't know where you live but I'm sure there are facilities available in your area to help with this situation, even if gets mad at you for interfering, you know you're doing it for his best interest so don't worry about that. He'll probably thank you when he's feeling better.

Crea

Call these people for advice or better still get your friend to call them

www.samaritans.org
www.aware.ie Helps people with depression
www.letsgettogether.ie Councels suicidal people

Your friend also needs to talk to his GP and get medicated for depression. There is no way that he can get out of this hole alone and, as good a friend as you are, you're not equiped to deal with this.
Good luck

Marksie

Suicidlefriend wrote:

Has anyone here been in a similar situation? What should I do? Should I call someone for him?

i think you do anything and everything you have to, there is ahistory of this in teh family yous say? and there is evidence of self harm before?

Regardless of a cry for help, there is a real potential for something to happen here, so use any and all professional resources you can. Hell use eny resurces you can

ZiabR

Crea wrote:

Call these people for advice or better still get your friend to call them

www.samaritans.org
www.aware.ie Helps people with depression
www.letsgettogether.ie Councels suicidal people

Your friend also needs to talk to his GP and get medicated for depression. There is no way that he can get out of this hole alone and, as good a friend as you are, you're not equiped to deal with this.
Good luck

Agree with all of this, get help for your friend fast before they do something silly.

LegacyUser

'

logik wrote:

Agree with all of this, get help for your friend fast before they do something silly.

If a call centre is who he calls for support at his lowest point, don't expect don't expect miracles. Depression to is a condition of the brain, that is triggered by chemicals you eat or are exposed to and stress and personal crisis is a factor. Like asthma, if treated well, the attacks are temporarily eased by inhalers but if you live in a muggy dusty room, and you take inhalers for temporary relief, you will have another one, but realising the dust is causing it important.

The same applies to your friends depression, if he feels low and Samaritans advise well, and he lives through it, another depressive episode may be tolerant to the same level of help.

You're friend I feel is calling for help, not suicide. He sealed up anger for long enough, and he explodes asking for help.

So you tell him, excess alcohol quit, if he takes amphetamines curb them down. I found myself improved by eliminating processed foods. I also advise a simple psychological evaluation, and doctors listen to your face to face visits.

Also dope use, causes extreme instability in potential bipolar disorder patients and those with mood disorders of any level of severity.

Contact a doctor for you depression and talk to anybody about your life day to day symptoms. We don't need a pill to go by life to daily activities, but a cup of coffee is a stimulant, and so is nicotine. So they are useful you may or may not agree but they withdrawal is a problem and all substance we have withdrawal from including hunger as it's a withdrawal from energy. So never abuse alcohol it makes the next day a total downer.

Good luck.'

jdivision

The best thing for that person would be to get away for a while, preferably somewhere warm where they can just forget about what's going on in their lives and start to relax and realise life has an upside. The self harm thing is common enough with people who are emotionally numb, it's their only way of feeling something and they can get some endorphins from the pain the cuts inflict. If attempted suicide runs in the family it's doubly worrying and your friend should probably go back to the therapist again or if your friend's not happy with that one get another one asap

Victor

Upanddown wrote:

If a call centre is who he calls for support at his lowest point, don't expect don't expect miracles. Depression to is a condition of the brain, that is triggered by chemicals you eat or are exposed to and stress and personal crisis is a factor. Like asthma, if treated well, the attacks are temporarily eased by inhalers but if you live in a muggy dusty room, and you take inhalers for temporary relief, you will have another one, but realising the dust is causing it important.

The same applies to your friends depression, if he feels low and Samaritans advise well, and he lives through it, another depressive episode may be tolerant to the same level of help.

You're friend I feel is calling for help, not suicide. He sealed up anger for long enough, and he explodes asking for help.

So you tell him, excess alcohol quit, if he takes amphetamines curb them down. I found myself improved by eliminating processed foods. I also advise a simple psychological evaluation, and doctors listen to your face to face visits.

Also dope use, causes extreme instability in potential bipolar disorder patients and those with mood disorders of any level of severity.

Contact a doctor for you depression and talk to anybody about your life day to day symptoms. We don't need a pill to go by life to daily activities, but a cup of coffee is a stimulant, and so is nicotine. So they are useful you may or may not agree but they withdrawal is a problem and all substance we have withdrawal from including hunger as it's a withdrawal from energy. So never abuse alcohol it makes the next day a total downer.

Good luck.'

I have removed about half of your post. Please don't make medical recommendations as this is not a medical board. Please read the charter.

Attol

Just make sure his friends are there for him. People making him feel loved could help a lot. The worst thing you could do is start excluding him. Organise nights watching movies or whatever where people get to bond. Take him away somewhere he's wanted to visit so he can get a bit of time to forget his problems at home. That could help him relax and give him time to see how he can address his issues. Make sure he doesn't feel alone.

Esel

Ring any large hospital and ask to speak to the Psychiatric Registrar, or ring a psychiatric hospital and ask to speak to any doctor. Explain the situation to them and ask them what you can/should do.

AFAIK, any person threatening suicide should be taken seriously, and the professionals should be informed immediately.

Telling your friend you are there for him, rallying round etc is all well and good, but I don't think it will change his thinking if he is depressed enough to be contemplating/threatening suicide.

Do you know who his GP is/was? Contact them if you do. Are you in touch with any of his family? I think they should be informed.

I know if I was in your situation, I would get onto a hospital psychiatrist pronto. If your friend does end up taking his own life, at least you will have done all you could.

Hope it all works out OK.

LegacyUser

Here's another link that might be of use. This page in particular offers advice to people who have been approached by someone who feels suicidal.

http://www.sosadireland.ie/helpothers/helpothers.htm