Desperate UCC Student

Dennis the Stone

Just saw this on the UCC bebo page. Yikes.

I will Pay any girl to go out with me PLEASE. 1 day ago



I am a girl-starved guy! STARVVVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!!!

Please help me. I have never even met any girl ever... but I'm not all that hideously ugly and I'm not fat, I mean it's possible to look at me....

I will pay you maybe E150 plus, just name your price, just to go out with me for one hour, that's all I want... and you'd like it too.

Please, please, please, please... oh for the love of God.... as long as you're not extremely fat/ugly... I'm paying you for it!

OH PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEEEE
..........

I'm not a typical guy that is trying to get a girl... I have never fcking met any girl before in my life ever... and I think I'm going to almost cry now... I'm going demented because all I want is to meet a girl once ever... that's all I freaking want it's nothing compared to what most guys have... and I think it would be so horrible for you to say: "oh I won't take the E150+ because I'm more moral than that/I'm not a slut"... that is the most immoral and fcking horrible, sick, disgusting thing to say ever. You'd like it as well. It doesn't even fcking matter to you but it matters so much to me... come on all I want is to meet up with a girl, that's all I want........ give a guy a break. And if you think I don't deserve to meet a girl because I don't know how to then You are a sick freak and should be fcking shot! And I'm not psycho or anything like that... maybe I'm just a little bit edgy because when someone is unnaturally deprived of something like sleep or anything he needs they just get a bit emotional and agitated... but obviously I wouldn't be like that if some girl met me... MEET MEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!! please... I'll be so gooooodddddddddd......... and you'll be happy and have the money as well.... and I'll pay you more if you want, just name your price. And you'll be doing something so good and making someone so happy...! Please....... I've tried fcking everything... but everyone ignores me... please just help someone out this once...

Red Hand

Now what lady could resist that?:)

Honestly, it must be a joke.

Stark

He doesn't seem quite as smooth as Richard Gere when it comes to soliciting hookers.

Terry

link.

Dragan

Actually, I met my current girlfriend based on a very similar post that I made on a bebo page.

Now we boil small animals in the basement and are adding to our joint collection of bodyparts and are very happy together.

biko

And if you think I don't deserve to meet a girl because I don't know how to then You are a sick freak and should be fcking shot! And I'm not psycho or anything like that

Smooth talker

Dennis the Stone

Terry wrote:

link.

you want the link? don't think you can see it if you're not a member of UCC..

here

I for one admire how he is straight to the point, and If I could pretend to be a girl I would. 150 quid to hang out for an hour with a loner? Shwayt.

Heyes

How sad :rolleyes:

Terry

Kemos wrote:

you want the link? don't think you can see it if you're not a member of UCC..

here

I for one admire how he is straight to the point, and If I could pretend to be a girl I would. 150 quid to hang out for an hour with a loner? Shwayt.

It's you, isn't it?
Come on. Tell us.
We won't be too harsh on you.

Dennis the Stone

If I had all that money to be spending on girls I'd be off to Amsterdam

Overheal

poor lad got his pic stolen and some eejits put it up on bebo....

gotta hand it to them: this is hilarious

people kill people over bebo though

NutJob

Sounds like his mates broke into his account.

Either that or his mind has broken

monkeyfudge

How has he never met a female? Was he raised in a monastery or something? Has he never been on the UCC campus?

Stark

I think he means "met" in the Cork sense. As in "Will you meet my friend?" (typically heard coming from 13 year old girls engaged in knacker drinking session).

skywalker

biko wrote:

Smooth talker

Yeah, jesus. That was the sentence that stuck out for me aswell. :eek:

Red Hand

monkeyfudge wrote:

How has he never met a female? Was he raised in a monastery or something? Has he never been on the UCC campus?

There aren't any women in UCC, obviously.:)

Overheal

I shudder to remind myself of all the years I spent in Flannans....stupid guy-school...

:|

Kemos wrote:

And I'm not psycho or anything like that

Ha:D

daveirl

This post has been deleted.

connundrum

daveirl wrote:

This post has been deleted.

I was asked to meet someone in Offaly before, couldn't make it due to previous engagement... oh well

Overheal

'met' was a whore term: its how they shake hands