Should I Challenge A Member of the Public

Motley Crue

I make my way home on a well known Dublin Bus Route everyday. Theres no real problems, except in the last while, when this women occassionally gets on. I know shes 20, works for some office in town, and dresses in very typical black and white style dress. I know her age and where she works because she keeps yapping on the bus to her mates on her mobile phone. I wouldnt mind, except the other day she made some remarks regarding Jewish people, the homeless, homosexuals and her disabled brother (whose in a wheelchair). She tells the entire bus her problems, when she talks to her friend, and you just keep thinking this girl is a spolit bitch who deserves a good talking to, to make her realise how stupid and prejudice some of her comments are. Especially the ones towards her brother. Im sure its not a reality TV show or anything, im sure shes a real person whose extremely loud, could someone please help me and tell me if I should approach her as I dont see getting another bus or sitting downstairs to be an option.

dr.bollocko

People will always be stupid. People are being stupid right now, in every language, all over the world. They are slagging your favourite book, they hate your favourite movie and they say mean things about your hair.
Its just that you cant hear these incredibly stupid people.
I would say just buy an ipod for your bus rides and you can live in blissful silence, totally unaware of this woman's stupidity. You might even make her realise that what she's saying is rude and ignorant, but more than likely she will just make a bitchy scene and be incredibly rude and ignorant to you, making your day even worse than when you had to hear said silly bitch bang on about other people.

Saruman

No offense but whats it to you? If you do not want to listen then bring headphones and listen to music or something.
Some people are loud and stupid and there is nothing you can do about it. If you say anything to her she will just get defensive so all you will do is create aggro and then give her something to moan about to all her friends for hours.
It will not make her see the light or any crap like that. No one ever has a life changing experience on a bus.

My advice. Leave it and ignore her.
[edit]dr.bollocko seems to have just got in before me with pretty much the same advice

CiaranC

lol, yeah you should shell out 300 notes for an ipod, that will solve your problem. pfft. God, people are doormats.

Tap her on the shoulder and quietly ask her to keep her offensive remarks to herself. Make sure you are calm and polite, but make sure she knows you mean what you say.

Miguel_Sanchez

You could always take out your phone, make a call and talk loudly about the ignorant racist that's sitting in front of you.

Oriel

Jeff_Lebowski wrote:

You could always take out your phone, make a call and talk loudly about the ignorant racist that's sitting in front of you.

Bingo.
Start slagging her off, and wait until she challenges you - then she started it

King of Kings

Saruman wrote:

No offense but whats it to you? If you do not want to listen then bring headphones and listen to music or something.

why should the OP have to tune out?Why should the OP have to change their habits (and spend cash) for some ignoramus.I could go one better and say buy a car.;)

I'd advise you to polietly tell her that you'd rather not listen to her opinions on a daily basis.

That's what i'd advise.
however me being the king of kings I'd tell her to "Shut the hell up". But I'm different and such confrontations don't bother me.


However i do realise over my time on this earth I probably have been vulgar in talking to friends on a bus/dart. By vulgar mean all of the above.
the reality is that she may not realise the extent of her lack of decorum.

Acid_Violet

The best way is to approach her calmly and assertively and say 'there are other people on the bus, could you please keep your voice down?'. You don't need to comment on what a blatant tool she is unless she replies and just say that we don't need to know about her problems and that it's blatantly rude not to consider other people. Maybe say that you're sure that what she's saying isn't something she'd like the people she's commenting about to hear, especially her brother, as in she'd be in a sticky situation if they heard her saying all that crap.

I'd say it's about time till someone takes issue with her, in any manner. Just whatever you do keep your dignity and be tactful so that you make a fool out of her in the way that everyone recognises.

Acid_Violet

Jeff_Lebowski wrote:

You could always take out your phone, make a call and talk loudly about the ignorant racist that's sitting in front of you.

That would be ****ing hilarious.

Just out of curiosity, if you wouldn't mind telling, would this bus route be in the D4 vicinity during most of it's travels and be going along the dual carriageway by any chance, possibly the route number being the digits either side of the number 5?

limklad

All she has done is exposed herself as a racist to others. You got to admire that she very honest and have the balls to say how she feels about these people in public.
Those people only see what they want to. She is using what see perceived as inadequacies of others (Jews, gays, handicaps, blacks, etc) to boost her own poor self esteem so she can feel good about herself. Now that you can see for she is truly is, you can either feel sorry for her, or laugh at her. She is in her own perverse little world. Little does she know or accept that is these people help to us all to bring up forward instead of backward and narrow minded like the racists that she is. People like her who is perverse do not want to change and will not without a big fight and put into humiliation. She is not going to change because you want to, or so you can take the bus ride home without getting annoyed.
If I say the following to her “I feel so sorry for you that you feel so insecure and feel the need to ridicule others to boost your own poor self esteem” You can imagine her aggressive response. It does matter in what you say to her she will get aggressive in either verbal or physical and blame it on you for insulting her.

Do not let this woman get to you. She will get what is due to her and she has herself to blame because it is her choice. You only get into trouble if you try to interfere with her. Just see her for who she is.
If she keeps her behavior up, I am sure she will get fired for degrading or insulting someone at work so keep this one hope close to your heart. If she doesn’t, it would be an absolute miracle….

patrickc

theres generally 2 floors on a bus? no way u can sit well away from her?

GAA widow

life could be worse. if it offends you that much switch on your ipod or move seats.

Rabies

Motley Crue wrote:

Im sure its not a reality TV show or anything, im sure shes a real person whose extremely loud

It is a bad state of affairs when people think they are on some show

As people pointed out. It really isn't anything to do with you. Those are her views, you may not agree with them like most normal people, but igonore her.
Listen to some music, or get a book and try to tune out.

Black Swan

Motley Crue wrote:

deserves a good talking to, to make her realise how stupid and prejudice some of her comments are

Do you really think it will do any good? That you could say anything that would transform her prejudice and behavior into that of a humane person?

ArphaRima

Jeff Lebowski wins this one hands down!... I really wish I'd thought of it myself. But yeah I'd say something alright.

Hagar

Would you even be considering doing anything if it was a 6ft tatooed skinhead on the 39 instead of a woman on the 46?

Red Alert

I'd buy myself a good set of DJ club-grade headphones. Great sound, and you won't have to listen to her. Is it her opinions or noise pollution you find more annoying?

Degsy

I dont think her opinions are any of your business.If she's being loud and disturbing you,you might want to ask her to keep her voice down a bit but getting into a discussion on the nature of her beliefs is really not up to you.

r3nu4l

Yep, saying anything about how ignorant she is being won't change anything. You could ask her to keep it down a bit but that's about it.

Hagar has it spot on, always imagine that the person is much bigger and meaner than you, then think to yourself, would I still say something? If not then don't bother, it's obviously not worth it.

pbsuxok1znja4r

It's not worth getting yourself worked up in the slightest over it. You can't take on mass stupidity like this. You can't win, there'll just be some other loud, ignorant person on the next bus or as soon as you get off the bus. You would have to stop somewhere in trying to set straight people like this so I reccomend you stop before you even start! Get an mp3 player for bus journeys, like.

iremex

"Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish" -- Euripides

as blue lagoon and r3nu4l stated, you'd be wasting your time

BaZmO*

iremex wrote:

"Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish" -- Euripides

"Never argue with a fool, they will lower you to their level and then beat you with experience"

podge79

Motley Crue wrote:

I make my way home on a well known Dublin Bus Route everyday. Theres no real problems, except in the last while, when this women occassionally gets on. I know shes 20, works for some office in town, and dresses in very typical black and white style dress. I know her age and where she works because she keeps yapping on the bus to her mates on her mobile phone. I wouldnt mind, except the other day she made some remarks regarding Jewish people, the homeless, homosexuals and her disabled brother (whose in a wheelchair). She tells the entire bus her problems, when she talks to her friend, and you just keep thinking this girl is a spolit bitch who deserves a good talking to, to make her realise how stupid and prejudice some of her comments are. Especially the ones towards her brother. Im sure its not a reality TV show or anything, im sure shes a real person whose extremely loud, could someone please help me and tell me if I should approach her as I dont see getting another bus or sitting downstairs to be an option.

why are you getting so worked up about it? you know nothing about her - you are basing ur accusations on assumptions you've made from what you've seen and heard on a few occasions you've been on the same bus as her. despite her talking out loud on her phone it is in essence a private conversation - just like two people having a loud conversation in a pub or coffee shop. You just need to tune out and not get worked up so easy - it would be different if she said it to you directly - get a set of earphones or something or if it bothers you that much get off the bus. People are entitled to their own opinions be they right or wrong, and you confronting her will probably only make matters worse - ye having an argument and you getting angrier - and in the end whats the point? You wont change her opinions or the way she acts.

Zambia

Hagar wrote:

Would you even be considering doing anything if it was a 6ft tatooed skinhead on the 39 instead of a woman on the 46?

Never a truer word spoken , this woman is causing no harm to anyone. In facxt I suspect shge has given you and your colleagues hours of conversation.

Let it go mate

Kinetic^

Get an mp3/radio and sit beside her. Then play it full volume in your ears and see if she says anything to you.

Acid_Violet

Surely though, if she's being rude and loud and annoying he should ask her to be quiet at least. I'm completely against being politically correct but if she's saying things that other people would find offensive and saying them loud enough for the whole bus to hear then she should be brought up on it.

Talliesin

Jeff_Lebowski wrote:

You could always take out your phone, make a call and talk loudly about the ignorant racist that's sitting in front of you.

I've done this.

The reaction from the asshole, and the subsequent reaction from others on the bus to their reaction, was ****ing brilliant

Acid_Violet

What did you do OP?

Overheal

Talliesin wrote:

I've done this.

The reaction from the asshole, and the subsequent reaction from others on the bus to their reaction, was ****ing brilliant

TELL US NOW :eek:

padser

Hagar wrote:

Would you even be considering doing anything if it was a 6ft tatooed skinhead on the 39 instead of a woman on the 46?

Does the fact that you wouldn't do something in a situation where you would fear for your saftey if you did do it, mean you shouldn't do something you believe to be correct in a situation where you don't believe your saftey to be at issue.

For example if 10 grown men are kicking the sh1t out of someone on the ground and you are passing by and decide to call 999 but not to intervene directly as you might get severely injured.

Does that mean that the following day when you see two '12 yr olds' kicking the sh1t out of an 8 yr old you are should do nothing except phone 999??

Acid_Violet

padser wrote:

Does the fact that you wouldn't do something in a situation where you would fear for your saftey if you did do it, mean you shouldn't do something you believe to be correct in a situation where you don't believe your saftey to be at issue.

For example if 10 grown men are kicking the sh1t out of someone on the ground and you are passing by and decide to call 999 but not to intervene directly as you might get severely injured.

Does that mean that the following day when you see two '12 yr olds' kicking the sh1t out of an 8 yr old you are should do nothing except phone 999??

Ah logic.......

Dudess

Degsy wrote:

I dont think her opinions are any of your business.If she's being loud and disturbing you,you might want to ask her to keep her voice down a bit but getting into a discussion on the nature of her beliefs is really not up to you.

I know what you're saying, but on the other hand, it's not as if she's talking about bands, films, books and colours that she likes but the OP hates. I think it's fair enough for a person to intervene when another person is making remarks that are downright offensive and hurtful. Maybe other people on the bus are members of the demographics which she's insulting.
Yep, I think she should be challenged - especially when she's blabbing all her poison in a public arena. Nobody should stand for that.

spurious

Perhaps she has an illness?

There is a young man gets on a bus I get who likes to talk in a very loud voice about emails he has received. They are generally of the 'you have won a million pounds' and 'I want you for sex' type. Now, he spouts on and on about these in a way that makes it clear he thinks he is the only one on the bus who has ever turned on a PC let alone knows anything about them. It's kind of sad in a way. He thinks he is impressing us all when really most people feel sorry for him that he needs to 'show off' at his age.

I described him to a friend of mine and she said my description of how he went on reminded her of a child she used to work with in a centre for kids with autism - sure enough, on hearing his name another time, it was him.

Ignore her. It's not like everyone else on the bus thinks you agree with her nonsense because you are not challenging her.

summerwine

Tbh, if you hear this every day, its prob worth saying something early and politely. Rather than it building up and wham you explode some day when you are at the end of your tether with her. I would suggest like a few others have suggested that you politely tell her to keep her voice down especially if it is to do with racist issues that others could get very offended with.

Baring in mind she is only 20, she still has to learn alot about life!

Overheal

If you see her that often; it might even have a lot more impact if you hand her a hand-written letter when you/she gets off?

Sinfonia

Jeff_Lebowski wrote:

You could always take out your phone, make a call and talk loudly about the ignorant racist that's sitting in front of you.

Ohhh, absolutely do that OP, that is a GREAT idea!

summerwine wrote:

Baring in mind she is only 20, she still has to learn alot about life!

Ah here, that's no excuse, if she was 5, and said "Daddy, why is that man brown?", you'd let it slide.
20 year olds should, and largely do, know better.

Acid_Violet

Overheal wrote:

If you see her that often; it might even have a lot more impact if you hand her a hand-written letter when you/she gets off?

Wouldn't waste my time, she's clearly a spa and she'd think the OP is in the wrong for thinking that. A nice swift confrontation and blow to her confidence would work better. She clearly isn't scared about speaking her mind after all and when she makes a tool of herself the results will only but hilarious.

Overheal

Is she like this?

PeakOutput

Motley Crue wrote:

I make my way home on a well known Dublin Bus Route everyday. Theres no real problems, except in the last while, when this women occassionally gets on. I know shes 20, works for some office in town, and dresses in very typical black and white style dress. I know her age and where she works because she keeps yapping on the bus to her mates on her mobile phone. I wouldnt mind, except the other day she made some remarks regarding Jewish people, the homeless, homosexuals and her disabled brother (whose in a wheelchair). She tells the entire bus her problems, when she talks to her friend, and you just keep thinking this girl is a spolit bitch who deserves a good talking to, to make her realise how stupid and prejudice some of her comments are. Especially the ones towards her brother. Im sure its not a reality TV show or anything, im sure shes a real person whose extremely loud, could someone please help me and tell me if I should approach her as I dont see getting another bus or sitting downstairs to be an option.

secretly record her and post it up here

Lemming

BaZmO* wrote:

"Never argue with a fool, they will lower you to their level and then beat you with experience"

Plagarist

Kold

Bludgeon her to death.

louisecm

dr.bollocko wrote:

People will always be stupid. People are being stupid right now, in every language, all over the world. They are slagging your favourite book, they hate your favourite movie and they say mean things about your hair.

Woah. Thats deep.

Spiritus Mundi#

Kold wrote:

Bludgeon her to death.

A little extreme but full marks for ingenuity!!!!

StupidLikeAFox

The world is full of arseholes, and your not gonna change that no matter how hard you try

Nevyn

Kold banned.