True mustard story

Solksjaer

I was in a chipshop in Waterford one weekend after a hard nights stag drinking. Anyway, I asked the chinoitalian behind the counter if they had any mustard. One of the chipper queue smart asss roared at me. Yer not in Dublin now with yer fancy mustard requests, gwan home ya Jackeen. Obviously I was startled by his racist remark. So I gave him the finger..., the chipper assistant then intervened and said, of course they has mustard, and brandished a bottle. The smart ass meanwhile got a bit irate with my one fingered reply, so he approached me in an agressive manner. I took the bottle of mustard off the counter and squirted it into his eye (quite a good shot actually), then all Hellmans broke loose, unbeknownst to my good self, his mate approached from 7.oclock and went for me, pulling me by the hair (big girl) I turned around and got the culprit with a huge dollop of chipper mustard right in the ear, he hit the deck like a sack of spuds . Another local guy then went for me, I turned and squeezed but shock horror I was out of mustard ammo and cornered. The eye and ear guys had both recovered and things looked bad, just then the chipper assistant gave me a quick whistle, and threw me TWO FULL bottles of mustard. I bit the top of both bottles and roared. OK REDNECKS LET'S BOOGIE......I blinded one and deafened the other two, they fled screaming and I had just enough mustard left to christen my 1st Waterford burger. It tasted really nice.

Pharell_st

sounds like they were as keen as.....