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Is it normal to feel insecure one or two months into a relationship?

  • 06-02-2007 7:19pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭


    Hi!

    I'm normally a fairly confident guy. I've been with a girl for the past two months. Things are moving quite fast, although neither of us have said I love you or anything like that.

    The thing is, she makes me feel (or perhaps I make myself feel) very insecure sometimes.

    For example today she was quite cranky and seemed quite withdrawn. This made me feel a bit cranky myself, as I wasn't sure if she was cranky because of me or because of something else. Things she said seemed to suggest it was me (she kind of wanted to be alone) but it turns out it was because of something totally different!

    I tried to explain this to her, but unfortunately being a silly male I didn't explain myself very well.

    What I'm trying to say is is it normal to be feel abnormally insecure at the start of a relationship?


Comments

  • #2
    biko
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 81,219 ✭✭✭✭biko


    Welcome to the wonderful world of longer term relationships :D
    Indeed, it may be very tricky during the first shaky weeks or months. Do I? Don't I? Could I have done better? Is there a future? And on and on...
    I'd say it's individual but as time progresses you will both become more secure and used to the idea of being together. Hope I just didn't add to the confusion.


  • #3
    Ruu_Old
    Closed Accounts Posts: 36,634 ✭✭✭✭Ruu_Old


    You have to know when is a good time to keep quiet and give your other half some space. :) Try not to step on each others toes. If things are going too fast, maybe sit down and have a chat about things with her.


  • #4
    Saruman
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,389 ✭✭✭✭Saruman


    Maybe its just that time of the month.. in which case... say nothing that could in any way be seen as negative to her.


  • #5
    Sony
    Closed Accounts Posts: 301 ✭✭Sony


    I find this fairly normal from my past experiences---what I will strongly advise you is that you just go along with it. Dont bug her by asking if everythings ok too often, Dont keep texting or calling too often (looks desperate) ,Dont try to take up too much of her time and whatever you do DONT start any fights with her about this sort of issue cause the beginning is its supposed fun fun fun and you dont want to be putting ideas in her head that youre going to be like this all the time.

    If its meant to be it will come good in time!

    Best of luck;)


  • #6
    Marksie
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,395 ✭✭✭Marksie


    yeah pretty much. you are still getting to know one another and Misunderstandings like that are pretty common as you are getting used to each others ways and idiosyncrasies.
    just make sure to work them through together and accept them


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