overactive sexdrive prob since split

LegacyUser

i'm 22 year old girl, and i have recently found myself single. we'd been going out for 2 years and we broke up mutually, because it just wasn't working out, we'd fallen out of love. for a while towards the end we'd had an issue with sex, where i had lost my sex drive a little (i think because i'd started on the pill). and when we broke up it was nothing much to me, i was sad because i'd lost a friend, more so than a lover. its been about 3 months now, since we split.

the problem is, since we split up, i've started getting my old sex drive back. i think its because i went back off the pill. but its driving me crazy.

i haven't gone out much since we split, because i was keeping myself really busy at work and staying in with my friends, so i haven't met anyone else i'm interested in. so i obviously haven't kissed or slept with anyone for 3 months. maybe its 3 and a half months, considering our sex life wasn't what it used to be when we broke up.

anyway, what should i do? i almost feel like ringing him to ask him if he wants to meet up for a shag, no strings attached!! LMAO! should i just go out this weekend and have a one night stand or something?? i seriously feel like i'm about 12 again and the smallest things are making me horny, and i'm even having sex dreams about my co-workers, which is completely unhelpful and dangerous (he's married, and actually my boss).

its not a problem for me to meet guys, or guys that fancy me, not being big headed, but there's always a few. but i rarely meet anyone i really fancy back. so right now it would be easy for me to have a one night stand, but hard for me to feel good about it after. i've tried masturbating, and even looking at porn (LOL), but i think its making me worse, the more i masturbate the more i think about sex. its not really that satisfying anyway, even though i orgasm, most of my thoughts are about being close to someone else, if you know what i mean? the chemistry and kissing hard and pulling and squeezing and fighting against each other because you both want it so much!

also i'm afraid of getting into some kind of over masturbating routine, which i think i had when i was younger, when i'd masturbate 3 or 4 times a day. i'd love to meet someone i really liked so we could work through this together (LOL), but i can't imagine i will.. so what should i do? either to fufil myself, or get my mind off sex? anyone been in this situation before?

sorry if this message was a little too graphic.. thnx

Black Swan

kitten69 wrote:

the problem is, since we split up, i've started getting my old sex drive back. i think its because i went back off the pill. but its driving me crazy.

sex dreams about my co-workers, which is completely unhelpful and dangerous (he's married, and actually my boss).

so right now it would be easy for me to have a one night stand, but hard for me to feel good about it after.

Danger, cause you are on the rebound! Suffered through that once myself. If you hurry into chance meetings or sneak out with co-workers or the boss (yikes!), only heartbreak can follow. Stay busy, be friendly with friends, but don't rush into a relationship. Have you tried strenuous regular exercise?

Kell

kitten69 wrote:

so right now it would be easy for me to have a one night stand, but hard for me to feel good about it after.

Erm, why would you not feel good about it afterward except for the fact that the sex is more than likely going to be a dunk fumbling experience leaving you sexually unfulfilled. The "on the bonnet of the car in a thunder storm best sex of your life" doesnt happen on a one night stand, I'll credit you, but why not enjoy it and have a laugh while you're at it (pardon pun please).

Sex is sex- a physical act not to be confused with sex with a partner that involves feeling. Your unwitting slave doesnt need to be the shining star of your eye in the fancying department either. If he has a functioning appendage and a hard spot for your soft spot, whats the worry? You need sex girl, so go get it.

Such a shame you're so young and I've grown a conscience.

K-

onemanband

I think you could use a fxxx buddy to tide you over until you find Mr Right. Do you have any unattached male friends that you suspect would be good in the sack?

You need to find a bloke who you somewhat fancy and has mega technique. Problem solved until you find Mr Right!

LegacyUser

'thanks for the advice guys. the problem is, i'd had quite a few one night stand/casual sex partners (or fxxx buddy as someone put it) before i met this guy. and when we first got together thats pretty much what we were going to be, but we ended up liking each other a bit more (never enough to be head over heels in love though, so it was a bit depressing sometimes).

anyway, the reason i don't want to start doing that again is because it is a pretty lonely unloving kind of thing, which is fine sometimes (hell, its even turning me on thinking about it, LOL!), i just don't know if it will throw up another set of problems the next day? like feeling slutty, worrying about what other people think, feeling empty etc. when all i really want the next day is a cuddle!

anyway, i think i need to steer clear of the casual sex route, its a bit dangeros emotionally (and maybe phsyicily!). so any other suggestions? i might try the excercise thing, i have been meaning to start jogging in the evenings again. although i don't think it dampened my sexdrive before.. the masturbation isn't helping, i just end up doing it more and more often (i'm up to about 4 times a day right now, is that crazy?)'

McGinty

This may sound really nuts, but are you bored with life at the moment, I don't know what the average amount of times to masturbate a day, but it sounds like to me that there is an emptiness in what you are feeling, I'm in a similar boat as you, however I'm busy with studies etc, so although I feel fruity at times it passes quickly because I have to focus on something, often being really busy helps with an overactive drive. I agree with you that the casual thing won't work, it sounds like you enjoy the feeling of closeness, not a wham bam mam, and casual sex for me I beleive feels empty, and most times reallt crap.

craichoe

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Package

should i suggest the obvious?