Am I overanalysing?

LegacyUser

I have been seeing seeing a girl for about a month. We were friends before we got together. Everything is going well, and things are developing nicely.

For the past week she's been away on holidays. We are texting each other a few times a day. The texts seem kind of strained, like we know we should be saying "I miss you" so we say I miss you, but not particularly because we want to say it (she's busy enjoying her holiday, I'm busy enjoying my life, etc.) Also, my texts are not as funny or interesting as they normally are! (sounds crazy, I know!) It's just that I find it hard to text someone when they're away on holiday as I can't really relate to what's going on around them.

As a result I feel like she's thinking I'm an idiot (based solely on my texts not being up to scratch!)

All her texts have been fine, and I haven't said anything too weird. I'm just being a bit boring and stiff.

Also I feel like I might be texting her too much. I'm texting maybe 3 or 4 times per day.

Am I overanalysing???

Ruu_Old

She is on holiday and probably enjoying it with her mates. Give her a bit of space and go have some fun yourself, you are wrecking your head thinking about it all the time.

~nop~

Yeah sorry 3 or 4 times a day is far too much. If youre going to say you miss her at least give yourself time to feel it. Let her have fun and you relax and then youll have all the more to talk about when she gets back.

When me and my boyfriend were going out about the same amount of time as you guys and i went on holidays we texted or rang about once every 2 days, and were still together 8 months later. It means when you do its not stupid or meaningless you know? At the very least make sure its not always you texting her first as this will cause her eventually just to see you as a nuscience and getting in her way.

Good luck though you sound like a lovely guy!

LegacyUser

'Thanks for the replies!

She's texted me first a few times, and out of the blue a few times, so it's not just me

However I've just sent her a text there saying I understand the whole being on holiday thing, so I'm cool if she wants to text less...

Ahh I'm such a worrier!'

~nop~

Ah yeah but its sweet because obviously you like her a lot and she likes you.
Hey just make sure you have some stories to tell her when she gets back as well as her having some for you, and other than that youre grand

chuci

wait till she gets back or else since ye have been friends before this then maybe you could tell her stuff thats happening with your shared friends.unless they are on holidays with them.otherwise like2-3texts i think would be enough per day?plus its wrecking your head if you think a text sounds strange re read it again before you send it and decide wether to send it or not.i know what you mean about not being able to relate though it sucks

dame

She's on holiday, stop texting. I'd say one text a day max unless you actually have some news that can't wait. If you can't survive for a one week holiday without panicing over the number and content of your text messages, then you've more to be worrying about than text messages! Living in each other's pockets is never a good thing. Just trust each other, enjoy your time apart and know that you're not going to forget each other in the space of a week!

Black Swan

A text a day is cool. Unless she sends you more, then by all means respond if you wish, or combine them into one response? I'm in an LDR that's been over a year, and I really don't worry about the number per day (as if there was a magic number). Sometimes I get excited about something, or have drank too much java, and I send several. Other days just one. I trust that my partner will tell me if I get too carried away. You two should establish the same kind of understanding?

Beruthiel

insecureguy wrote:

Also I feel like I might be texting her too much. I'm texting maybe 3 or 4 times per day

Way too many texts, she's on hols, leave her be. A text every few days is ok.

Red Alert

When someone's not there, it does change the dynamics of things a bit. So things which were funny (or even just worthy of a text) aren't anymore. For instance I'm not going to MSN my friend in the states saying "this stupid compiler is driving me nuts" but i might have MSN'ed the same person when they were upstairs in the building for instance.

You are doing fine, and by all means if she texts you text her back - don't be playing games with her. But if you feel that there's no news, then there's just no news, so don't text this time and you'll have more to tell next time.

Elphaba

I think it depends on the people. I'm with my boyfriend since last summer and when I went on hols in November I loved gettin texts from him. We wouldnt be texting non stop or anything but it was nice to know he was thinkin of me:o