Mobile phone records

LegacyUser

This query is partly technical and partly a personal issue.

My longterm partner was away from home at a function a week ago or so.
I have no firm reason to believe she may have cheated and in general
I am a very understanding and "benefit of the doubt" type of guy.
We've had some ups and downs in our relationship including the
occasioal decline in her interest for me so I suppose curiosity took
the better of me.

I placed a goodnight call to her hotel room around the time she was going to bed.
I know this sings of a certain amount of mistrust but I did peek at her
incoming call list a day or thereabouts after when she was back home
and there was no record on her Nokia 6234 phone of my incoming call.
A little more bizarrely even though the call I made to her appears on
my billed calls (I checked my bill online) the dialled call doesn't appear
on my own phone set (a Sony Ericsson) as a dialled call.
I know she didn't set her phone to divert so the only possibility that
I can see is that (a) she deleted the call record .. and... purely
conjecture..... could have deleted other late evening calls or (b)
this was just a pure glitch in the system and maybe even call records
on phones get truncated automatically from time to time so it would
be extremely foolish for me to make any conclusions.

I kind of feel silly now for going to the bother of checking her
phone call log. It does indeed show I have a sneaking distrust (which
is an awful thing, I admit). I normally feel secure around these things
but maybe her lack of interest in me is purely hormonal and I've
let my suspicions and guardedness play on me.

Any advice or tech info would be gratefully received.
I really dont' want to dive into a forensic examination of totally
circumstantial evidence here. I just need advice or reassurement.

thanks

Nevyn

If you placed a call to her room then surely you rang the phone ext in her room ?
Could she have had her mobile turned off and there for there is no misses call.

If there is no record on your phone of the call being made or dialed when your phone normally logs such things then it sounds like a phone network issue.

Two weekends ago ( ie not the weekend just gone ) there were problems with the vodafone network, friends of mine were ringing me and my phone never rang as the call was not connected across the network corretly, my phone didnt how a misses call and as thier call was never connect corretly it was not listed as dialled/ call connected on thier phone.

IF you are not happy with your realtionship and feel that there issues then you need to talk to her about it.

Red Alert

Some phones will only store the last 5-20 calls.

jimmycrackcorm

I'm perplexed to understand what you would learn from her phone having either rang or not rang.

I missed a call this evening because I left my mobile in the car. Whether I delete any call lists or not has no bearing on anything....

You'd be more productive in posting about your relationship instead.

turbot

In terms of call records:

If you have itemised billing, you should be able to see that you placed a call, provided it connected somehow. Keep in mind these systems are not perfect.

In terms of whats visible on a mobile phone, some phones only store a couple of recent alls. Others get reset if you swap sims (for example, if her friends mobile ran out of batteries) and she put the sim card into your gfs phone.

The phone record alone tells you absolutely nothing.

LegacyUser

Hi Thaedydal

Just to clarify - I phoned her mobile number and we chatted for about
15-20 mins. I didn't place the call to her extension at the hotel.

The record of the dialled call appears on my Vodafone bill details.

The call doesn't appear on her received call log despite the fact that
other calls day before and after do appear on her call log (on her
Nokia handset). That was why I was a bit concerned that maybe
she may have been erasing call records for other calls. Actually
if there were network issues which messed up call records on handsets
then that's a big relief to me and it goes a fair way in terms of
giving a possible explanation.

As regards discussing problems in the relationship .. we have discussed
these at various times. To be honest I thought things were generally
improving in the relationship but this incident shows me that i must
harbour some mistrust for some reason.

cornbb

Forget about her phone record. There's no way you can conclude anything solid from it and if you don't forget about it, the wondering, paranoia, suspicion and guilt (if present) will eat you up and make everything worse. Talk to her about your problems instead.

Nevyn

Becareful about where that mistrust is coming from and what it causes.
I know someone that was so worried that his gf would break up with him and looking for reasons why she might and was that insecure in the relatiomship it started to effect the relationship and she did break up with him.

the-ging

ok Nokia phones only save the last time you called the number, so if you called her phone after the date it will only store the most recent call record.

Well I tested this on a Nokia 6020, and it worked, so I persume its the same for all the nokia's

LegacyUser

Op re the call log : if you have called your girlfriends phone since that evening your number would only be stored in the phones call received log once. If this is the case you can select time of call where your number appears on the log and the times of your most recent calls should appear. I think the time of the last 5 calls received from the number should be stored

But i don’t think the call log is the issue here. You really should look at your relationship & trust issues. If you are prepared to go to these lengths to find evidence that your girlfriend is cheating, you will find something to cause suspicion, whether it is warranted or not. I mean, if you look hard enough you will convince yourself you have found something to prove she is cheating. (even if she is not)

Carry on like this and you will loose her!!!!!!!!!!!!

sceptre

the-ging wrote:

ok Nokia phones only save the last time you called the number, so if you called her phone after the date it will only store the most recent call record.

May be true for the 6020 but it hasn't been the case with Nokia phones I've had.

As for the OP, it's not exactly enough to build a body of evidence on.

milod

trustissue101 wrote:

Just to clarify - I phoned her mobile number and we chatted for about 15-20 mins. I didn't place the call to her extension at the hotel.

OP, you certainly are harbouring mistrust, and there's got to be a reason for that, one you need to identify and work on...

So you chatted at bed time for 15 to 20 minutes... did she seem impatient or eager to get rid of you? and if she did, is it because you're a little 'needy' at the moment? or maybe you would rather believe there was a taller, richer, more handsome guy (with a bigger penis of course...) waiting patiently for her to finish?

Perhaps you need to work on your self esteem, and try to explain this to your girlfriend too. If she understands you're having issues, she'll be less likely to take offence when you inevitably reveal your mistrust.

I shouldn't really encourage you sifting through circumstantial evidence, but I know Motorola phones only keep the single most recent call of any series of made, received, or missed calls - not sure if this applies to Nokia. So if you called her more recently, her phone might only store the most recent call...

dr.bollocko

the-ging wrote:

ok Nokia phones only save the last time you called the number, so if you called her phone after the date it will only store the most recent call record.

Well I tested this on a Nokia 6020, and it worked, so I persume its the same for all the nokia's

From having worked with numerous Nokias before and for a mobile phone company, this is true of most if not all models of nokia. If you called her after the date you originally called her, then the last time you called her may have been erased.

Though why it would matter I really dont know.
I mean you cant even draw a conclusion from what you are implying. Its just paranoia for the sake of having something to worry about from what I can see.

LegacyUser

'OP

Billing is not generated by the phone, its generated by the billing engine in the core of the mobile network after the handset is authenticated and the call is set up and torn down.
Deleting call's received dialed missed etc on phone will do Nothing to her bill whatsoever. If you freaked look at the phone bill thats 'the bible'.

Personally I think you worrying over nothing and have too much time on your hands'

Gone West

Look, you obviously have bigger issues with her than anything.
You have serious trust issues that need to be addressed before you can continue a relationship with this person.

LegacyUser

If there were calls from before and after that proves that if she was deleting calls she was only choosing specific ones. So on top of her secret lovers number why would she proceed to delete yours and leave the others there??

Lou.m

Jeez just ask her:o Just say you tried to call that weekend and ask if her phone is working. If you dont feel you could ask her then something is wrong between you. It could be that it was a glitch it could be that she was tired and did not want to answer. Just ask her did she ever get your message or whatever. Dont make it all secretive and complicated just ask ' hey i made a call to you that weekend and could not get through do you know what happened?' I think it is very worrying that you have gone to all this effort of checking her phone and then posting here without going to her about it. You should be able to communicate a bit better in your relationship i dont mean to be harsh but why are you talking to people on boards about this but you cannot talk to her. You should be able to talk to her about anything maybe that is what you should work on.:o

LegacyUser

'OK. I've definitely over-reacted in the way I approached all of this.
I suppose curiosity got the better of me.

I might post issues about the relationship on an entirely different thread
but I do take the advice that really I should be talking to her about
relationship issues. I also take to heart the fact that I need to bury
mistrust and the source of it unless there is a very good reason for
me having it in the first place.

I think the strongest likelihood here is that there was a simple glitch
or just literally the mobile handset did obliterate my original incoming
call record on her phone (because I called her the following morning
from my handset again).

Thanks for the advice. I kind of new these things in my heart but
needed to be told by you guys that I was getting over suspicious
for no real reason.
There are intimacy issues in my relationship and I think I tend to
react by trying to over analyse why my wife (yes wife) might be
lacking intimate feelings for me. To be honest.. the cause is probably
mostly tiredness and hormonal reasons and I've probably being
worrying unnecessarily....

I can see that it will be counterproductive for me to harbour those
inadequacy/mistrust feelings too much or at all in the future.'

lazygit

if i switch off my phone, when i turn it back on, the recieved call and dialled call list is empty.

Black Swan

trustissue101 wrote:

I kind of feel silly now for going to the bother of checking her phone call log. It does indeed show I have a sneaking distrust (whichis an awful thing, I admit).

I think you answered your own question?

Capt'n Midnight

If you dropped the phone it could loose all setting except those on the SIM, I used to have a phone like that , wouldn't remember a thing if went flat or battery popped out.

Was the place near the boarder or could her phone have been roaming to a different network that might have made your number different. What's the prefix to hide your number again ?

It's very easy to delete records on a phone if you, can't remember how many times when trying to look at messages it was on the Delete yes/no stage.

Many phones will take micro SD or other memory cards, technically speaking it could be possible to get the phone to record every converstation.. Of course any evidence that something like that was happening would almost certainly mean the end of the partnership so really about as useful as a chastity belt.