Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

Dumb and Funny Warning Labels On Products

  • 27-11-2006 9:08pm
    #1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 691 ✭✭✭


    Toilet Plunger
    Caution: Do not use near power lines.(Say what?)

    Dremel Electric Rotary Tool
    This product not intended for use as a dental drill. (i should hope not)


    Hair Coloring
    Do not use as an ice cream topping.(Dam there goes my dinner plans)


    Dial Soap
    Directions: Use like regular soap. (and that would be how?)

    Stridex Foaming Face Wash
    May contain foam. (you dont say!!!)

    Sleeping Pills
    Warning: May cause Drowsiness(Well thats no good to me)

    Christmas Lights
    Warning: For indoor or outdoor use only.(as opposed to?)

    Mattress
    Warning: Do not attempt to swallow(WHAT?)


    RCA Television Remote Control
    Not Dishwasher Safe(Well how else can i clean it?)

    Pine Mountain Fire Logs
    Caution: Risk of fire(well duh!!!!!!!!!!)

    Hair Dryer
    Warning: Do not use while sleeping. (but thats the only time i have to do my hair)

    Road Sign
    Caution water on road during rain.(Maybe get a blanket?)

    Children's Superman Costume
    Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.(But i wanna be a superhero......)

    Air Conditioner
    Caution: Avoid dropping air conditioners out of windows.(Well im not lugging it down the stairs)

    Slush Puppy Cup
    This ice may be cold(May- thats not definate right?)

    Bag of Fritos:
    You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.(A shoplifters dream!!)

    Boot's Children's cough medicine:
    Do not drive car or operate machinery.(So this is why all those 5 year olds have been crashing thier cars-Mystery solved)

    Sainsbury's peanuts:
    Warning: contains nuts.(Oh dear sorry im allergic)

    Korean kitchen knife:
    Warning keep out of children(But how else will i kill them!!)

    New Zealand insect spray:
    This product not tested on animals.(Just bugs!!)

    Blanket from taiwan:
    not to be used as protection from a tornado(Oh dont worry it wont be)

    Infant's bathtub:
    Do not throw baby out with bath water.(Cos that would be crazy?)

    Package of Fisherman's Friend throat lozenges:
    Not meant as substitute for human companionship.(HA HA HA)

    Curling Iron
    Warning: This product can burn eyes.(Only the eyes-Im ok so)

    Toner cartridge for a laser printer
    Do not eat toner.(But im hungry)

    A toilet bowl cleaning brush.
    Do not use orally.(What about analy?)

    A birthday card for a 1 year old.
    Not suitable for children aged 36 months or less.(In case of????)

    Can of air freshener.
    For use by trained personnel only.(Good im just finished my training course)

    Sign at a railroad station
    Beware! To touch these wires is instant death.
    Anyone found doing so will be prosecuted.(I think the death is punishment enough)

    Manual for an SGI computer.
    Do not dangle the mouse by its cable or throw the mouse at co-workers.(But i hate them)

    Small print from car commercial which shows a car in the ocean
    Do not drive cars in ocean.(But i like to swim).

    Bag of cat biscuits
    Simply pour the biscuits into a bowl and allow the cat to eat when it wants.(No it will eat when i say!!)

    Depend Adult Diapers
    Step into underwear and pull them on just like regular underwear.(Im a big girl now)

    Box of household nails
    CAUTION! - Do NOT swallow nails! May cause irritation!(I dont feel anything so far)


Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,800 ✭✭✭county


    some good ones there


  • Moderators, Education Moderators Posts: 2,432 Mod ✭✭✭✭Peteee


    Cyanide Pills - Caution, may contain traces of peanuts


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 947 ✭✭✭fobster


    pepper wrote:
    Sign at a railroad station
    Beware! To touch these wires is instant death.
    Anyone found doing so will be prosecuted.(I think the death is punishment enough)

    ROFLMAO! :D

    Another one.

    Bag of peanuts. Caution: Small children can choke on nuts.

    Fair enough but so can anybody else, what makes children so damn special lol!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,801 ✭✭✭✭Kojak


    Lol :D:D


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 743 ✭✭✭Mad Dog


    Rofl :D:D


  • Advertisement
  • Moderators, Regional North West Moderators Posts: 19,159 Mod ✭✭✭✭byte
    byte


    pepper wrote:
    Sign at a railroad station
    Beware! To touch these wires is instant death.
    Anyone found doing so will be prosecuted.(I think the death is punishment enough)
    Should that not be electrocuted :)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 15,515 ✭✭✭✭admiralofthefleet


    fobster wrote:
    ROFLMAO! :D

    Another one.

    Bag of peanuts. Caution: Small children can choke on nuts.

    Fair enough but so can anybody else, what makes children so damn special lol!


    some bloke sued a peanut company and won a few years ago after he choked on peanuts, now certain brands of peanuts carry the warning 'warning:may contain nuts'


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 157 ✭✭carpenoctem


    :D LOVE those. A few to add:

    On a Swedish Chainsaw:
    "Do not attempt to stop the blade with your hands or genitals."
    (I want to add that in Swedish the word for genitals is the same as the word for limbs, but it still cracks me up!)

    On a bottle of shampoo for dogs:
    "Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish."

    On a Revlon hairdryer:
    "Do not use in shower."
    (But wouldn't that be handy? To wash the hair and dry it at the same time!)

    On a hand held massaging device:
    "Do not use while sleeping or unconscious."

    On a toilet at a public sports facility in Ann Arbor, Michigan:
    "Recycled flush water unsafe for drinking."
    (Damn, I always drink out of loos!)

    On a 13-inch wheel on a wheelbarrow:
    "Not intended for highway use."
    (Well where ELSE would you have wheelbarrow races then?!)

    On a rock garden set called 'Popcorn Rocks':
    "Eating rocks may lead to broken teeth."
    (Hmmmm... it may just lead to more than that)

    On a laser pointer:
    "Do not look into laser with remaining eye."
    (Cause if you just looked inte the laser with one eye, you may not wanna lose the other one as well?)

    On a microwave oven:
    "Do not use for drying pets."
    (Words defy me...)

    A label inside a protective bag (for fragile objects), which measures 15cm by 15cm by 12cm:
    "Warning: Do not climb inside this bag and zip it up. Doing so will cause injury and death."
    (If I were a midget, I would say TOO LATE :D)

    On a packet of blu-tac:
    "Do not use as ear plugs."
    (Well, everyone knows that chewing gum's the way to go!)

    On a Boeing 757:
    "Fragile. Do not drop."
    (Yeah, I thought that was the whole idea of aircraft?)

    On a ortable stroller:
    "Caution: Remove infant before folding for storage."
    (That might be clever)

    On packaging for an iron:
    "Do not iron clothes on body."
    (Well, if you dry your hair in the shower, this is just another way to save time...)

    On a hammer:
    "May be harmful if swallowed."
    (Well if you swallowed the nails from the last one...)

    On seal on a packet of ketchup:
    "Do not eat if seal is missing."
    (Well how would you know?!)

    On the metal barrel of a .22 calibre rifle:
    "Warning: Misuse may cause injury or death."
    (There's a risk...)

    On a 6x10 inch inflatable photo frame:
    "Not to be used as a personal flotation device."
    (Again, if I were a midget...)

    On a cordless phone packet:
    "Do not put lit candles on phone."
    (And you would do that why?)

    On packaging for a wristwatch:
    "Warning! This is not underwear! Do not attempt to put in pants."
    (Again, why?!)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,584 ✭✭✭c - 13


    This one has always been my favorite, seen it on matches and a few other bits and pieces.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,399 ✭✭✭✭r3nu4l


    Very good pepper :) I like them :D

    Originally posted in AH I see, isn't this the second thread in two days you've had moved? :D I guess you just post everything in AH and use the mods as your aministrative staff to ensure it eventually gets to the right place :D


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 33,763 ✭✭✭✭Princess Consuela Bananahammock


    Billy Connolly was on telly last night about hairdryers:

    "Do not use while in shower..."
    The acting-stupid was first rate!

    Everything I don't like is either woke or fascist - possibly both - pick one.



  • Closed Accounts Posts: 691 ✭✭✭pepper


    r3nu4l wrote:
    Very good pepper :) I like them :D

    Originally posted in AH I see, isn't this the second thread in two days you've had moved? :D I guess you just post everything in AH and use the mods as your aministrative staff to ensure it eventually gets to the right place :D

    Ya i wasnt sure where to put it sorry


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 950 ✭✭✭Feral Mutant


    pepper wrote:
    Korean kitchen knife:
    Warning keep out of children
    Who are they to tell you how to raise your kids?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,399 ✭✭✭✭r3nu4l


    On the bottom of Mars celebrations boxes:

    'Do not read this while box is open' :) (obviously a joke)


  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 93,603 Mod ✭✭✭✭Capt'n Midnight


    fobster wrote:
    ROFLMAO! :D

    Another one.

    Bag of peanuts. Caution: Small children can choke on nuts.

    Fair enough but so can anybody else, what makes children so damn special lol!
    Because they have smaller oesophagus / windpipes ?

    or maybe it's because kids nowadays are allergic to peanuts, that sort of thing didn't happen when I was young.


Advertisement