I think Im Bi

kalmanon

I think I might be Bisexual but am not sure, I find myself attracted to guys as much as girls, and am unsure of what to do about it. I dont know whether to try and experiment or try to get a gf/bf or to do nothing. What would people advise?

Boston

Here are my thoughts on BiSexuality

In the end the decision is down to you, and the only thing you can be sure of is that either which way, you'll make mistakes.

A few words of of wisdom though,
"A man can build a hundred bridges in a hundred countries, and suck one cock, but he'll be forever known as a cock sucker".

Something I've found very true, so be carefull and in any decision you make, it's very hard to go back.

Hmm_Messiah

I don't want to rubbish what Louiville said, but that kind of thinking delayed me discovering more about "who/what I am"

any experimenting is ok, in any area, and sex just lends itself to experimentation. So what if you do somethign that you fnd later "is not for you"?

If you feel an attraction to guys and girls.... probablymeans you are attracted to guys and girls! At least for now. sexuality is not some static thing.

Experimenting with girls is in some ways the easier option. If you want to check out how things go with a guy but scared of been "marked" by it, then use a bit of discretion.

And have some fun !

purplekitty

heeeey... first of all yoou didnt say what age or anything you where but lemme give you some of my advice that i discovered myself...

never deny yourself anything... always stay true to what you want.

if you think your bi then... you probably are, and theres no harm!!! just twice as many options.
iis easy to start off with a heterosexual option, its just easier and if your not happy with the results or feelings your getting from it then just dont waste any time on it.

be free... its amazing:p

purplekitty

thats so scoldy!!!

Goodshape

Hmm_Messiah wrote:

I don't want to rubbish what Liouville said, but that kind of thinking delayed me discovering more about "who/what I am"

any experimenting is ok, in any area, and sex just lends itself to experimentation. So what if you do somethign that you fnd later "is not for you"?

If you feel an attraction to guys and girls.... probablymeans you are attracted to guys and girls! At least for now. sexuality is not some static thing.

Experimenting with girls is in some ways the easier option. If you want to check out how things go with a guy but scared of been "marked" by it, then use a bit of discretion.

And have some fun !

Was going to say something similar myself -- I don't agree with Louivelle's "words of wisdom".

It's true some people put a lot of emphasis on the cult of sexuality, but you should never limit yourself out of fear of what others might think. They don't have to live your life.

LegacyUser

In my opinion, most people are Bi to a certain extent. I am a 24 year old female and I have been with both male and female. I have to say I'm swinging more towards males but how can one not love the female body?!!! Do what you feel most comfortable doing. I don't regret a thing.

Boston

Well it's grand to say that people shouldn't be limited by what other think of them, but it's hard to live up to that, we all have to live in the real world. You might think that what I said is pretty ****ty, I agree it is, however it is true and accurate that some things can never be un-done, so be causious, don't rush things.

I'm not saying stay in the closest the rest of your life because it's hard.

if you think your bi then... you probably are, and theres no harm!!! just twice as many options.

Most people question their sexuality at some point in their life.

azezil

LiouVille wrote:

however it is true and accurate that some things can never be un-done, so be causious, don't rush things.

I see where you're coming from but I disagree, to hell with pussy footing about, if I didn't throw myself in at the deep end when I did, I'd still be wondering 'what if...' and so far back in homo-represstos land that I'd never come out.

Some people just need to close their eyes and take that first plunge into the unknown, worst thing that can happen is you won't like it, so you move on happy in the knowledge that at least you tried it.

Don't do life by half, it won't get you anywhere but a one way ticket to Regretsville.

Transcendant

They are right you must embrace all parts of your person or it will consume you.,

Boston

You make it sound like this is someone who is definitely Bi and just needs that push. I always come accross badly when discussing these things, purely because I look at it from the view point that most people who ask the question "am I bi" in the end arn't. Explore, fine, do whatever you're comfortable with, but I feel you can answer allot of the questions about your sexuality without committing yourself 100% first.

abetarrush

Whats with all this experimentin jazz??

If you like someone and are attracted to them then its wouldnt be experimentin, it'd just be actin on an attraction

Would you just exp with some randomer?

I agree with Liou, think it over, it could be somethin minor, or very major

I don't recommend gettin a B/GF as if you find out you only like one or the other, its not fair on them

It shouldnt be too hard to find out

GL

Boston

abetarrush wrote:

Whats with all this experimentin jazz??

If you like someone and are attracted to them then its wouldnt be experimentin, it'd just be actin on an attraction

Would you just exp with some randomer?

I agree with Liou, think it over, it could be somethin minor, or very major

I don't recommend gettin a B/GF as if you find out you only like one or the other, its not fair on them

It shouldnt be too hard to find out

GL

You and me are not on the same page. I'm merely saying don't out yourself to the world right away, your saying that that he/she shouldn't be with people because he/she might hurt them. From experience there is only so far you can so in your end head before you'll have to try something one way or the other to know, though it is important to make that journey in your own head first. It is not easy to find out on your own.

azezil

LiouVille wrote:

You and me are not on the same page. I'm merely saying don't out yourself to the world right away, your saying that that he/she shouldn't be with people because he/she might hurt them. From experience there is only so far you can so in your end head before you'll have to try something one way or the other to know, though it is important to make that journey in your own head first. It is not easy to find out on your own.

Oh ok, yeah I agree with that, I wasn't suggesting he 'out' himself, I ment give it a go, as in the physical aspect of being 'with' a guy, then decide.

abetarrush

LiouVille wrote:

You and me are not on the same page. I'm merely saying don't out yourself to the world right away, your saying that that he/she shouldn't be with people because he/she might hurt them. From experience there is only so far you can so in your end head before you'll have to try something one way or the other to know, though it is important to make that journey in your own head first. It is not easy to find out on your own.

I know, I was just sayin I agreed with ye

Nevyn

Free your mind and the rest will follow.
Seriously.
You can be bi and have never kisses or laid a hand on a person of the same gender in a lustfull way.
It is your life and your choices.
You don't have to go experiemnet or give into those wants/needs/urges but you have to be honest with yourself about having them.

azezil

To thine own self be true, but should you be so with others...?

In relation to your sexuality, I don't see any reason to be, however, talking about it with a friend or two may be helpful.

Vinnie69

To Bi or not To Bi that is the question!

Experiment is the way forward in my experience, tried the boys first and the girls afterwards. I discovered very quickly that I could only perform with the girls if I thought of my best friend (took a lot of concentration). Then I came to the conclusion - why settle for 2nd best. Good luck !

fozzle

Thaedydal wrote:

Free your mind and the rest will follow.
Seriously.
You can be bi and have never kisses or laid a hand on a person of the same gender in a lustfull way.
It is your life and your choices.
You don't have to go experiemnet or give into those wants/needs/urges but you have to be honest with yourself about having them.

Bingo.

I struggled with this for years, and in the finest style of self hatred became a vocal critic of bisexuals, labeling them "fence sitters" or just girls trying to attract guys. Luckily in my final year at university I had a very good mate who helped me work through the spiralling madness in my head and accept who I am (cheers beardy!). At the end of the day the most important thing is being content in yourself. Once you accept yourself (as straight, gay, bi, whatever) then everything else falls into place. As Thaedydal says, it's possible to know you're bi without ever touching a member of the same sex, and once you know you're a lot more relaxed which makes it a damn sight easier to pull than if you're stressing out about finding someone to experiment with.

Hope at least some of that made sense.
fozzle

kalmanon

thanks for all the advice guys, I appreciate the diifering perspectives and I suppose I will have to find my own way through all this, although you have all given me something to think about