Stuck In a Cycle

LegacyUser

Hey I post on Boards but very rarely on PI but i just need some comments or someone elses views. Be Brutal .

Im currently a second year in college, age 23. I find myself losing complete interest in it. When I went to college the first time at 19 I lost interest , dropped out got a job , lost interest in that and went back to the point I am now. Im afraid I can see it all happening again. Point is Im realising I am 23 and Im in exactly the same position I was when I was 19. Nothing has happened to me or for me in the past 5 years. So all in all you could call them 5 wasted years and a large part of mylife wasted for nothing which puts a dampener on trying to drag myself out of bed now to go to college , somethimg which is more impossible to do everyday (in bed atm).

Key Points:
Im exhausted with the same stuff
Im afraid im stuck in a cycle of nothingness

perhaps this makes no sense, i guess I just need to vent or have someone listen.

Thanks

Kell

OP wrote:

Point is Im realising I am 23 and Im in exactly the same position I was when I was 19. Nothing has happened to me or for me in the past 5 years. So all in all you could call them 5 wasted years and a large part of mylife wasted for nothing

"And then one day you'll find, ten years has got behind you, no one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun".- Roger Walters.

You need some perspective here. At 23 you are a toddler. The retirement age is 65 therefore you have a potential 42 years which is almost twice your current age. Stop being so hard on yourself.

You give up on things as you seem to suggest that if it doesnt work out the way you want it to, you quit and do something else. Thats bollíx. Real (TM) facts of life-

1) Most of life wont go the way you want it to, get used to it
2) Most of life is repetitive monotany punctuated with occasions of fantastic fun
3) At some point you will have to commit yourself to earning a wage doing something that may well not make you ecstatic to come to work in the morning. Deal with it

OT- there seem to be a lot of younger folk out there thinking "is this it. Home to the telly 4 nights week and maybe a pint at the weekend". This is the reality unless you choose otherwise, so pull your finger out of your rear ends and do something with your lives.

OP- make a decision and follow through with it and get over yourself. Life is only as complicated as YOU choose to make it.

K-

SmoothyG

Hey OP,
you are definatly getting down about your boredom, Its tough adjusting to making all the calls yourself, trying to entertain one's self all the time is difficult. Like with college we all have to spend a lot of time doing things we think are boreing because the end result is worth it.

It doesnt matter what course you do there will be loads of research and boring sh1te to do.

you sound like you only get exited by changes, (i cant stand the monotonus parts inbetween) but the trick is to keep your focus short term.

most of all, IT IS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY TO MAKE YOURSELF HAPPY.
you are born into a very small population fo the world whom has the oportunities you have, Mopping around feeling sorry for yourself seems kinda self absorbed considering what we see on international news every day.

so cheer up, put on a smile thank your lucky stars you wernt born in Iraq and go out for a pint, on your own if needs be, and say hi to the first pretty girl you see.

MikeHoncho

You sound a lot like a friend of mine OP. He was in nearly the exact same situation a couple of years ago and guess what he dropped out just like you are contemplating. He also has always had problems getting out of bed to face the day.

He spent 2 years doing nothing in a dead end job. He recently realised what a massive mistake he made and has gone back to finish the same course he dropped out of in the first place and I havent seen him as happy in years.

Overheal

or: you could join the Army....at least thats what my Dad always said...F****er.

Im in my first year, and I get what you mean; but I also already had to repeat the LC so thats where I dug up my motivations. Sadly, this saw a lot of time of me smoking in a process I called 'meditating' (pfft) from which I ironically concluded I was wasting ever-more time in the process of asking 'whats my motivation'.

In the end, I stopped thinking about it altogether, and focused on my studies. I found that I felt the most rewarded as I have in my entire School-faring life; because now I know stuff; and only from finally understanding all that mindless drivel can I finally piece it together to become something useful

Right now, I figure Im just going to keep learning until I get to some state of Academic Nirvana, where I say "ok...this is it..".

I wonder if that helped as much as I had hoped, but meh.

Last thing: Im not a bookworm: I smoked too much, got 400 points in the LC (after beating my own *** off I can tell you) and now Im pursuing games developent...and as obvious a career choice as that sounds, Im still not entirely sure what I wanna do, I just know its somewhere in that ballpark

Black Swan

If you are really grand at something and you enjoy doing it, my cousin used to tell me that I would have no need for money.* Well, find something you can be good at and enjoy, and go do it!







*He was talking occupation here, not playing computer games or whatever...

Overheal

I agree: find something you enjoy doing, and you wont need to spend money to go do things you enjoy

Esel

Overheal wrote:

Im still not entirely sure what I wanna do, I just know its somewhere in that ballpark

Do you have 'ballparks' in Carlow now? I know you used to have 'fields' there!

@OP: Do you smoke? If so, this may be a factor in your apparent lack of motivation.

Overheal

Aye, I had noticed that, Esel. Ive dabbled in it only a handful of times since I got here, opposed to the 4 times a week during my leaving :?

Stupidly though, I still have that nagging habit of leaving my projects until the week before they're due: Well...2 weeks, now that I checked, but hey Im workin' away

And yeah, the ITC just built a new Pitch and theres another one ready next year

LegacyUser

'Thanks folks . It really helped .

And I do smoke although will quit soon '