ThreeSomeFun

LegacyUser

Hi guys,
going unreg for this.

recently myself and the Bf have gotten into the scene of 3 sums / swinging. We both find it really exciting for obvious reasons. But we get the feeling we cant really tell anyone about it as it seems to be frowned upon. Whats your views on this?

chamlis

It's a bit odd, would be most ordinary people's reactions I'd imagine.
As for the old guard and religious zealots, they'd probably think you were satan's spawn or some such.

Really, what do you expect?
I don't have a problem with it (Hell knows I've tried to try it), but it's really none of my business. Or in other words, I wouldn't want to know. So don't tell me.

doubtfir3

I think that someone is always going to get hurt at the end of this.

I had an friend talking to me about this a couple of weeks back, and how 'great' it was but I couldn't help but wonder what is supposed to happen when inevitably someone gets jealous/attached/offended?

If you're very secure in your relationship and you feel that you want to do this then go for it.. but be careful.. and be aware.;)

Miguel_Sanchez

ThreeSomeFun wrote:

But we get the feeling we cant really tell anyone about it as it seems to be frowned upon. Whats your views on this?

Well one of the reasons you shouldn't go around telling people about it is that there's nothing more boring about people who go on about their sex lives all the time. It's that sort of 'oh aren't we so wild we do X, Y and Z in the bedroom'. It smacks of attention seeking and those sort of people tend to believe that they're the only ones who get up to X, Y and Z. Thing is - lots of other people are doing it too it's just that most people don't feel the need to blab about their sex life to whoever will listen.

So - bear this in mind. Most people don't want to hear about other's sex lives.
Why do you want to tell people about it? Unless of course you're trying to get them to take part with you.

LundiMardi

Yeah, if you told me, i'd just be like ''and i wanted to know... why?''

And personally, i can't see how any good can come from this.... couldn't do it myself with someone i really cared about, if i couldn't give a **** about them tho, that's a different story:)

LegacyUser

Jeff_Lebowski wrote:

Well one of the reasons you shouldn't go around telling people about it is that there's nothing more boring about people who go on about their sex lives all the time. It's that sort of 'oh aren't we so wild we do X, Y and Z in the bedroom'. It smacks of attention seeking and those sort of people tend to believe that they're the only ones who get up to X, Y and Z. Thing is - lots of other people are doing it too it's just that most people don't feel the need to blab about their sex life to whoever will listen.

So - bear this in mind. Most people don't want to hear about other's sex lives.
Why do you want to tell people about it? Unless of course you're trying to get them to take part with you.

I know were your coming from but its just the fact of having someone else to talk to about it.

With regards to getting hurt well god only knows what will happen. but we decided to try. no harm in trying i suppose? just wanted your opinions

Nevyn

If some one told me I would not bat an eyelid but I would consider it to be a confidence and certainly something not to speak to others about.

Some people you will be able to tell other's you will not.
I can certainly understand you being all a buzz about this new wonderful and intresting aspect to you life and the urge to tell others about it.
If you can't not find such people with in your own socail circle then I would suggest you seek out discussion groups to talk about your experiences and maybe learn a few things from others.

Speaking about the new aspect to your life some people will not want to know at all for a range of reasons from moral grounds to being uncomfortible knowing the personal details of your sex life to really wondering why on earth you felt you had to tell them.

If I were you I would be selective to whom you choose to confide in and remember to play safe.

LegacyUser

Me and my bf decided last year that we'd try it out.. only as yet we've had no luck, we are both fairly good looking, young, fit ppl, the problem is we don't know where to find a willing subject.. We've tried adult chat rooms, gay bars etc.. no luck.. Any prospective girls in the chat rooms either turn out to be guys or just chicken out or whatever.. Any tips op ;-)

Talliesin

If you're in the swinging scene, as you say, rather than just enjoying a threesome with one other person, the obvious answer seems to be "talk to people on the scene".

Now, you may or may want to be open about this aspect of your life with other people to varying degrees for varying reasons, but as far as finding people you can really talk to, the scene's your best bet.